I would not buy a huge house. I would buy a small cabin on a lake and write. Since money is not a problem, I wouldn't care if I got published. I would also travel. I would probably do the cliche thing and backpack around Europe. I would take pictures and probably write a book about my travels. This book would not be some "Eat. Pray. Love." bullshit. I would take the time to write it in my small cabin by the lake. If it got published, that would be great. If not, it wouldn't really matter. I see this as a long-term plan because you can write for forever.
I'd finish my Master's, then take a PhD. Not having to care about making a living from my field of study, I could learn whatever I wanted. I'd have two or three kids. This is a big one: I'd buy a big chunk of land somewhere close to where my family lives in southern Ontario. I'd then get in touch with the local college and allow the agricultural students access. It would be one big giant dog park, but it would have different areas and trails as dictated by what the students/teachers of the college felt would be appropriate given the geography and the soil conditions. Plus, I figure, if I let the students use the land for research and learning, I figure I'd get the maintenance and planting for free. (Not that it would matter, but still.) There is a complete lack of good off-leash parks in that part of the world, and it would be so awesome to have the use of several hundred acres just to walk your dog wherever you felt like.
Interesting that, if you won the lottery, the first thing to go would be FutureWife... Honestly? I'd give it away. I've heard too many stories of people winning the lottery and having it ruin them - their relationships with family, friends, the whole bit. I'm smart enough to make a good living on my own, as are the people in my life that I'd share the money with - they don't need it, and neither do I. Aw, hell, maybe I'd set up an education fund for the nephew before I wrote a big effing cheque to the Canadian Cancer Society.
Buy a large parcel of land and build a therapeutic community (that's extended rehab). 75% of the residents aren't covered by insurance and can't afford to self-pay, and the other 25% is a mix of insured/self-pay. I'd live and work there the rest of my life, but for one month each year, me, the wife and kids travel and see the world together. I would also establish scholarships at my high school and college alma maters.
I'd be willing to bet everything I own that if you were actually given the money you would change your mind very quickly.
Finish college. Get custody of the kids. Hire nannies from playboy. Take some cooking classes. Take a run at the world series of poker. Basically spend my days making a bucket list happen. Oh, and of course massive party at my house, I would fly out any TiBettes who wanted to attend. Their significant others, and most Tibers would have to figure out their own ride. And, of course, get Hotwheelz laid. Oh, one of the first purchases I would make would be a play set of every card from every set of Magic the Gathering.
Perhaps. But until someone plunks that satchel at my feet, I stand by my convictions. I make good money. I don't need millions to make me happy. If I did, I'd probably be one of those people throwing $20 onto the LottoMax (or Powerball, or whatever the fuck it is) every week.
On the giving it away front, I've atually thought about this. I'd take a chunk, whatever amount I figured I needed to fix my house the way I wanted and buy the piece of crap next door and tear it down so I can have a citrus orchard and room for my peacocks to wander around, enough to set up trust funds for the kids so they would have enough to be able to live well and be educated well, but not enough for them to be useless, and take the rest and dump it, tax free, into a charitable foundation, with all of the legal implications of that, created and administered by me. That way I give myself a job, working for myself, doing something useful. People begging me for money is just a bonus.
Instead of incesting, I'd use the money to develop a time machine to go back and fuck Helen Keller (See other thread).
Some people are SO selfish. I would throw the a TIB party and invite every one of you. I'd pay airfair too! Hookers, blow, hairbrushes, pudding pools, gorilla costumes, shitpussies, drano, otters, unicorns, the whole nine yards. I'd do it right.
I'd open up my own gym. A Westside Barbell, Elite FTS kind of place. Monolifts, power racks, bumper plates, chains, bands, you name it. And if you curl in the squat rack you get tarred and feathered. If I had enough money afterwards I'd start my own E-Sports association, like MLG or IPL. Have invitational open tournaments first, and have amateur only open bracket tourneys for less money. Then combine the two into an MLG style event. Holding an EVO style SF IV series? Hell yes. Although I'd bring back an SF III only tournament since, let's face it, that is by far the more complete game.
Lets say I won... $50 million. $15 million goes right to stocks/bonds or otherwise invested. I want a nice reliable income. $5 million goes to my daughter when she hits 21, and of course is used to raise her in comfort til then. $10 million to open and operate a few businesses. First off I'd buy my favorite strip club, and just kinda hang out there when I wanted to and let somebody else handle the day to day stuff. Throw in a few Section-8 housing complex's, with convenience stores nearby selling dirt-cheap cigarettes, beer, and snack foods just for even more money. The other $20 million goes to build a very nice underground bunker/mansion in northeast Nevada, Elko County to be more specific; and to buy a condo in Louisville, Kentucky and one in Charlotte, NC. What's left goes into bank accounts for daily living expenses. If all goes well I'd eventually have enough cash built back up again (over the next 25 years) to establish a military-history museum using my private collection as a base; which of course I'd expand in the meantime using my titty-bar profits. Granted I know fuck-all about money and investments so the numbers would have to be fudged a bit should this ever happen but it's generally along the lines of what I'd do.
I would start my own show 'Undercover Busboy.' I would go to various cities, work in various restaurants as a, wait for it, busboy. I would have a fake Spanish accent and everything. Then the 'gotcha' moment would be me screaming obscenities at the boss for being a prick. I'd probably get bored of that in a few weeks, so I'd play golf. A lot. Live out my days by the shore. Relax. Write.
- Midget butler. Nice salary, major benefits in exchange for all the horrible shit he'd have to do. - Buy an island where I'd develop a machine to hijack space shuttles, pitting the two space super powers against each other. - Invest heavily in various techs, then flood Silicon Valley by detonating explosives on a fault line. Blame it on earthquake. - Start a media network. Manipulate events to start WWIII for my own exclusive coverage. - Launch an EMP satellite to shut down bank instiution electronics to cover up a massive hacking robbery worth billions. - Invest heavily in gold. Involve the Chinese to melt down the U.S. gold supply to make my investments skyrocket in value. - Buy a fluffy white cat. - Kill Bond.
For whatever reason this made me laugh. The thought of you upbraiding some fat ass red faced restaurant owner and then driving off in Lambo while ripping off your fake stringy mustache was a fantastic visual. FOCUS: Unlike some of you, I would welcome the money. I think alot of my activities would be scalable. For example, I'm 26 and single. Despite dreaming of owning a mansion, I have no need for one yet. An awesome penthouse apartment in a solid building will do. Similarly, I still plan to live/work in the city, I don't need a fleet of whips. A luxury daily driver and something fun like a 612 would work. When I'm in my 30s, 40s with a family? Then I start doing things like buying 25 acres and building an estate that would make a Gilded Age robber baron blush. Similar to what someone said, while I would travel, I would much prefer a couple residences in places like London, Barcelona, and the like. Visiting a country or new place is fun, but so often, I find myself leaving and wanting to stay for another week. Not to see more landmarks, but to see what it would be like to really live there. Cultural immersion for me. I'd need a hobby or a job. Would definitely start a record label/studio. Music production and recording is something I've wanted to dive more into for a few years, but I've had limited time and resources to do so. Having plenty of both I'd spare no expense to put talented people around me. I wouldn't be some hack celebrity who used their wealth to pump out their shitty singles or band's albums, but rather have the resources to learn and experience with the best and see where that takes me. Every stupid rich person needs some dumb extravagences. I'd lean towards my own menagerie of sorts. Aquariums in every room, probably a koi pond in my foyer. My kids wouldn't have a house cat, they'd have an ocelot and we'd have a pack of Direwolves in the yard (because I'd pay to breed wolf/Northern Inuit dog hybrids to closely approximate the actual animal, duh.) Finally, I'd throw whatever money necessary to fuck up my Dad's business opponents. Not necessarily give my Dad any competitive advantage, cause he wouldn't want or accept that, but more take away the bullshit that prevents him doing his job properly or his company succeeding as it should. The 2 lawsuits for patent infringement and malpractice he had to let go/settle for a small amount because he couldn't continue to deal with the lawyer fees/legal bullshit. Yeah, those would be pursued fully. The company who lost my Dad a huge client because they cheated his system process and then brought it to the client's attention before my Dad could discover it cause he was on vacation? Those fuckers would be buried. Oh and I'd buy Manchester United and purposefully run them into the ground to shut up every obnoxious American bandwagon fan.
R_Flagg hit on something I totally blanked on. The post apocalypse stronghold. 2 stories underground, courtyard, 20 foot walls, turrets, food, seeds, a large tract of land, own water supplies and creeks, guns, ammo, bows, swords, axes etc. A whole all around "got it covered" type hideaway out in the boonies. Take hard copies of books/texts/encyclopedias etc. You got the world ending, well, we got something to survive it type of place. That and a little cabin on the one corner to go stay on weekends, and hey, who wouldn't want to practice with catapults by launching your friends into the nearby lake.
I'd load up my backpack, put on my sturdiest boots, get myself down to the airport, and go until there was nowhere else to go.
A castle. A fucking castle. With boiling oil cauldrons and catapults, which will launch volleys of honey badgers at the invading Saxon forces. Surrounding the castle will be a flaming moat stocked with fire-retardant sharks that I regularly poke with a sharp stick to keep good n' pissed off. The castle tapestries will depict a picture of me dancing "The Cabbage Patch" in a Vuarnet half-shirt and 80's Adidas shorts on a pile of money. Out front is a statue of Bruce Campbell with chainsaw in hand, and every friday I open the doors to host 4H dances for the area's kids.