The latest meme to hit the Intarwebs is this picture of a couple during the Vancouver riots. FOCUS: When have you hooked up with someone in a less-than-appropriate time or place? Did you two sneak out at a funeral? Running away from ground zero on 9/11 and popped into a Starbucks bathroom for a quickie? ALT FOCUS: Experiences where your significant other was yourself (i.e., a solo job) are acceptable also. I mean, we have to let Ballsack and Durbanite participate too.
I can't think of anywhere super inappropriate that I've hooked up, except for a couple of times when other people were in the room...but I think we've all been there. The most twisted place I've hooked up, though, was in our hometown's playground when we were in college. The kicker is that when it was being built we were 8 or so, and the place is lined with tiles of the little kid handprints of ourselves and basically everyone we know. As for solo missions, my friend's grandma's house was pretty weird. I set the bar pretty low here. I"m both interested and frightened to see what this thread will become.
I hooked up in Riverside Park in the middle of the day once. If any of the many kids around had happened to come closer than 20 yards they might have noticed something. Thank god for whispering and long skirts. Not sure if this quite counts as the focus, but when I was in high school I hooked up with a girl in the bathroom of a Barnes and Noble. The one in the children's section. It was basically empty when we got there, but when I peeked out to see if anyone was around, quite the line had formed. In retrospect, wandering out and leaving without saying anything to the girl was the wrong option, but she was real smart and I'm sure she figured it out eventually.
I had sex with my FWB at the time in one of the buildings on campus. In a hallway against the wall. This was during finals week, and to be fair the hall we were in seemed pretty deserted. All in all it was one of my favorite experiences, and it's an awesome story when talking to people who went to the same school as I did. I can second the "doing it in a room with other people there" sentiment. I had sex with my girl during a movie, very quietly, behind my buddy and his girlfriend who were watching it with us.
On the roof of a building mid-day on a Saturday Not sure if you guys heard about this but some some people had a brief encounter on the roof of the tallest building on the USC campus. Needless to the say the school wasn't too happy. As for me, I'd say getting head in the back of an elementary school (it was night) or in the same room as other people are the tops I remember, but the current girl wants to find somewhere outdoors in the near future so hopefully I can add something soon. Edit: The lounge of my dorm freshman year. Had sex with one girl there and got head from another later in the year. Looking back I was a classy guy back in the day.
Haha, I probably shouldn't tell this story, but I will anyway. Back in my college days, when I was a junior or senior, and my sister and all of her friends were freshmen or sophomores, it used to be a great party. I hooked up with a few of them to say the least. One in particular though, we were all drinking one weekend night, and decided to hit the town, after coming back from the bars, this girl and I stopped by a local elementary school a couple blocks off campus. We climbed up the fire escape on the back side and had a bit of fun. Then again on the playground slide. Another time, same girl, we were at her friends house sleeping in the basement with about 8 other people all around us when we decided to do the deed. Not the best timing, but definitely fun.
A few years back, when I was living with my then girlfriend, we had some friends over for the day. I caught my girl giving me the look, so I went over to her and she mentioned that she wouldn't mind a quickie, but our bedroom was right next to the lounge where everyone was... and it would look strange if we both went in there. I told her no worries. Took her hand and led her out to the garage. Opened the rear door of her car (it was closer), laid her down across the seat, pulled her jeans down and gave it to her. If you got a problem, 'yo I'll solve it.... All... class... baby.
Cemetary, Church, yard of a Catholic home for the mentally ill that gave out anti-condom litterature when I was in highschool, using a condom, airplane bathroom, airplane under a blanket (partial points only, didn't finish), nightclub (that wasn't ok with sex on premesis), blue light disco (teen event run by the police), in an alley, in the walk way along side my office building (across the road from a church, fuckers had the gates locked), on a bus, in the cargo compartment of a bus, in the botanic gardens at night, in the botanic gardens on a week day, on a quiet beach at night, in the dunes of a busy beach during a day, in the car at a busy beach, on a popular mountain lookout, on another popular mountain lookout, with the girl tied up and suspended from the roof beams of a popular mountain look out's weather shelter, on a commuter train in the walkway between carriages, in the cargo section of an SUV with heavily tinted windows, in the middle of a major business district during work hours, on the balcony of a hotel with an audience of random passers by. Bar bathrooms, nightclub bathrooms, rave bathrooms, warehouse party bathrooms, sex on premesis venues, fetish clubs and on the balcony/deck of private homes where we didn't to our knowledge have an audience probably don't count, but would also be on the list.
Wait, what? You mean like the 3ft high tunnel thing that runs along the side/bottom of the bus? The logistics of this blow my mind... you wouldn't even need to flog someone to make this hurt. The conference room at work was memorable, as was the road head on a major highway, and on a cable car/ski lift thing in Switzerland. Once on a plane, where we got applause from the local rugby team (this was vastly overrated, save it for the hotel when you arrive). Extremely popular beach. Nightclub chill-out area in Ibiza. Oh shit, I almost forgot. When I was dating a girl who worked at Adventure World, we had the run of the park to ourselves at night. Basically everywhere, including the lagoon, pools, and 'rail rider'. And last but not least, Skull Rock:
It was an exceptionally stupid idea and I had a huge lump on my head afterward. Nearly forgot, a demo spa in a spa shop, the elevator lobby of my office, the office gym, the car park of my office, all after hours.
The famous "couple making out" picture isn't what it looks like: it's an Aussie couple, and she'd been pushed to the ground, hit her head, and was crying out in pain. Her boyfriend was comforting her, and the later pictures show other people coming up to see if they could help, not "watch the action". More can be read about The Origins Of The Riot Kiss Photo Revealed.
The girl's bathroom at my senior prom. My girlfriend at the time and one of my female friends went in there to do whatever it is girls do in the bathroom when they go in in groups (practice making out and fingerblasting each other, I assume), female friend came out, girlfriend didn't, I said "fuck it" and went in. This was at a very nice place so each stall had its own floor-to-ceiling door and its own sink with counter, so I lifted her up on there and we went at it. The best part was that this was at the Pyramid Club in downtown Philly (the building with the pyramid-shaped top right in the middle in the picture); every time I'm watching a Eagles/Flyers/Phillies home game and they cut to the Philly skyline coming back from commercial, I get a chuckle seeing a building that I fucked in. Spoiler I also fucked in a dorm stairwell my junior year of college. I was at some lame dorm party, hammered out of my mind, and some girl I had hooked up with the year before was there (this girl was not attractive but had a decent body and was great in bed, plus I'd also been hammered the year before when I fucked her). I'm hitting on a hot girl at the party and it's going OK--I'm not in yet by any means, but I've got a shot. All of a sudden the girl I'd fucked before comes up and (also hammered) starts throwing herself at me. I try telling her to go talk to her friends and I'll find her later and it works for a little while, but soon she's back. Seeing my shot at banging the hot girl quickly going down the shitter, drunk logic takes over and I make a decision--if I take the ugly girl back to her room and fuck her she'll leave me alone and then I can come back to the party and try and fuck the hot girl. That'll definitely work, right?? Problem was, the unattractive girl and I both lived in the same dorm building, which was a good 10-minute walk from where this party is being held. Normally a 10-minute walk would be no big deal, but I was trying to make this quick so that I could get back. Walking down the stairwell to the exit of the building, I had an epiphany--there's no one around!! Quickly I sat down on the stairs, pulled her on top of me, and started taking her clothes off. We started going at it and things were going fine until maybe 10 minutes later, when a couple people showed up in the staircase. Obviously the show that was going on was more important than wherever it was they were going, and before long a crowd of 30-40 people formed. Eventually the girl sobered up enough to become embarassed about this and insisted we go back to her room (in retrospect, I really wish I'd finished on her face for the crowd). From what I heard later pictures were taken, although I never saw them. I also got the pleasure of overhearing 2 or 3 people talking about it on the campus shuttle bus about a week later...I guess they didn't recognize me.
The best I got: Bathroom of a bar in Barcelona. In my seat on an airplane (only a beej, but close enough right?) Behind a mosque in Morocco. During the deed, they began the call to prayer to make just a little more sinful.
I think I posted this before. I once got a blowjob on the back row of a church bus while on a youth group trip. A chaperone was sitting directly in front of me.
I think the most inappropriate place was the shower at a guy's party who I had only met that day. It was the only bathroom in the apartment, and people kept knocking on the door. It was only inappropriate because the guy I was in there with had never met the host and neither of us were actually invited to this party. I'm not saying this is particularly exciting, I'm just saying this is the most inappropriate place for me.
Fucked my (now) ex in the backseat (not a euphemism for anal) of her brother's car in broad daylight in a part of town that was kind of secluded, but not secluded enough that we had complete privacy. The best part is that we got caught. A friend had been trying to get ahold of me and by the process of elimination, he found us. I rolled down the window, stuck my arm out and shooed him away. I may or may not have been balls deep when the shooing took place. I don't remember.
The roof of my high school with a cheerleader. Many study rooms in the main library of my college. Sorority meeting rooms/ study rooms. On the roof of my house, on the firetruck parked in front of my house http://ookaboo.com/o/pictures/topic/12587263/Pi_Kappa_Alpha (not our chapter) Cars, pick ups. In my ex's friend's hot tub while the friend was making us food. In a minor league baseball team's dugout... A favorite of mine when I was freshly 16 and with a car was going to parking garages, and going all the way to the top level. Most of the garages here in Chicago you can see the skyline, and make moving to the backseat easy.
On top of a random car hood in the middle of a packed parking lot. In a cabana on top of a building overlooking the Caribbean Sea.