Its time for a stupid Friday thread. We've done this focus before, but I dont give a shit. Here's how its going to go. Someone posts a "Would you rather..." and you have to answer the previous post before yours and a reason for your pick before posting your own. Focus: Here we go: Would you rather sleep with Caitlyn Jenner or spend a month in a locked room with Gary Busey?
Busey. He's old enough that I could choke him out if he gets uppity, plus think of the stash this guy has on him. A dream job would be being Gary Busey's babysitter because you'd have the ultimate top-shelf medicine cabinet to pillage. Being locked in a room with this guy is punishment? I look at it as an unearthly batch of entertainment. And wear a motorcycle helmet. Idiot. You were a fucking Oscar nominee. Focus: Would you rather fight George St. Pierre or fuck Aretha Franklin
Aretha. So long as she belts out a few choruses of 'Respect' while we're doing it. Focus: Would you rather be forced to listen to Kanye West for an hour or Kim for an hour? You are bound and gagged, no response possible. You just have to listen.
Kim, for two reasons. First, listening to Kanye would result in a brain bleed, and I would die. Second, you didn't say blindfolded, and at least I can stare at Kim's tits and zone out. Focus: You can never shower again (or go in a pool/the ocean/ get wet at all) the rest of your life, OR, you can only sleep 1 hour a day the rest of your life.
Sleep an hour, I currently sleep about 3. Leaves me more time to shower. Be born ugly as hell with a big dick or super good looking with a tiny dick?
Big dick. I could parlay that into some weird fetish porn. Focus: Toss Rosie O'Donnell's salad or let your grandfather give you a full body erotic massage?
Toss Rosie's salad. You could make that memory go away with enough alcohol. But all the therapy in the world wouldn't remove the emotional scars of your grandfather giving you an erotic massage. Focus: Have as much sex as you want, with whomever you want, whenever you want, forever.... Or be the richest man alive but never be able to have sex or see a woman naked.
None of these have the slightest, recognizable bit of an upside. Either you're kissing Tommy Lee Jones' gizzard neck or making eye contact with your aunt while she gives you an HJ during Thanksgiving dinner.
Sex robots. Just hang out on your yacht for a few years until the technology is perfected, then you're set.
Unlimited sex, that's a no-brainer. I'd also probably never leave the house again except for work. Actually scratch that, I'd make money by making porn of myself and all the famous hotties I'd be screwing. Focus:Would you rather never be able to eat meat again or never be able to drink alcohol again?
Never drink alcohol again. Meat is awesome and I'm not a much of a drinker anymore, so it wouldn't take much to just cut it out of my life completely. Focus: Would you rather immediately have an orgasm every time you hear a Nickelback song or automatically make the Wilhelm scream every time you orgasm?
Scream, as that would be a porn career in the making. Would you rather have a partner that was fantastic in bed, but difficult and annoying outside the bedroom, or a partner that was terrible in bed but you got along with better than anyone else outside the bedroom?
You have to go with the good personality. I mean, sex only takes up a minor fraction of your life and if your wife sucks in bed then that's why The Lord blessed with some wonderful things like hookers and imbittered, horny, drunk bar-stars. Focus: Would you rather have the ability to fly (and only fly) like Superman or stop time in its place whenever you want to fuck with shit?
I think the ability to fuck with time would be the ulitmate super power. No need to any alternative. Focus: Would you rather be able to to pick the winners of any sporting event or be able to predict the ending Dow average every day.
Dow average. Mostly because I don't really follow sports. Who would you rather fuck: A woman who has been dead for a few days or your own mother?
Although both tempting, I'm curious: when fucking the corpse, is it lame after-prom sex or is it REALLY givin' her the Ol' Business? Because a few days rotten she may break apart and that could cause delay in orgasm to say the least. Which you DON'T want. I'm stuck. Focus: Would you rather get stuck in an elevator for 24 hours with Andy Dick or Courtney Love?
Andy Dick because at least I'll get high and get my cock sucked. Would you rather never speak again or always have to say everything that was on your mind?
Easy, never speak again. I would probably be dead inside a day if i said everything that was on my mind. Would you rather only listen to justin beiber for a year or get head from your mom?