Game rules, no cap no cut But even Superman couldn't turn your love down, I Slipped up, slipped in Hey man what the hell you doin? Raw dog is a never I know I know better Heard her whisper Don't worry I'm safe Didn't matter cuz it's already to late I was lost in the sauce, dead wrong And I ain't stoppin' now Parleein' in the bush again Didn't think about what I was puttin' in it
Focus: I'll never again "collect" anything besides memories. I've moved too many times, into smaller and smaller places. Everything I need fits in a carry-on bag, a couple of boxes and my external hard drive. Also, church. Or joining any cult or subscribing to any belief system, no matter how well intentioned. To paraphrase Alan Watts, every religion, every philosophy, every belief system is a finger pointing toward the truth, and most people are content to sit around and suck on the finger. Not me; not anymore. Alt Focus: Basic dignity and kindness. I was kind of a prick as a lad. I probably had more fun that way at the time, but I've come to enjoy the pleasure of doing someone a solid and expecting nothing in return.
Focus: Write love letters. I used to do this all the time when I was younger. I would think a guy was cute and write a 5 page opus to him. Alt-Focus: Swear. I went to catholic school for 9 years and was taught that cursing is an affront to God. It didn't take me long to break that.
Not having a backbone. I remember years ago having a friend of a friend knock at my door around 11pm asking me to help him move that night. Of course I didn't want to but I didn't have the balls to tell anyone "No". I found out later that he asked me because he knew I would say yes. After that I grew a set.
I don't get it, were you rolling over your dong like a condom and then rubbing one out with like you were wearing winter gloves? The friction would rub you raw not to mention if it was already crusty.
And don't murder anyone, either. If you get caught, it's not only expensive, it will fuck with your life for years. Yep, that's the main reason.
FOCUS: -To reiterate, once again, drive drunk. I did it a ton when I was younger. Mostly driving from one college party to another, and then back home. Even stupider considering total cab fare, if split with only one or two friends, would probably have been less than $10. I never got caught, but after seeing two close buddies go through DUIs (I was in the car when one of them crashed into a fence after hours of drinking), I was scared straight. I haven't driven with more than one light beer in my system in nearly three years. -Drink to black out. Don't get me wrong, I still black out from time to time. But there was a period in college where I seemed to actively be trying to drink myself into a coma. The phrase "Black Out or Get Out" was thrown around. Now, I realize my true enjoyment from drinking comes in that heavy-buzz phase, well before memories start to disappear. -Enjoy going to clubs. I used to love that shit when I was 18-22. Now, I'll go maybe once a year, and it's usually to appease a girl. I still like bars with dance floors, but the places that are one giant grindfest no longer appeal to me. ALT. FOCUS: -Be a man. I'll admit it, I was kind of a pussy in high school. I was afraid of getting hit in football. I barely knew how to use a wrench or set up a tent. I'd never been in a fight. Good God people, I was sometimes afraid of the dark as old as 21. Now, I consider myself extraordinarily self-sufficient, and on backcountry camping trips I'm almost always the one handling the brunt of the work. I often find myself with not-insignificant cuts and bruises I don't even remember getting. If I hear a bump on the night, my reaction isn't to cower and hope someone else deals with it, but to roll my eyes in annoyance and grab a golf club from the closet. I even grew a full-on motherfucking beard last winter. BAM.
Focus: +1 to driving drunk. Well, +2 actually, since my dumb ass has 2 DUIs. I'd like to say it made my life unbearable, but I have a knack for adapting to situations and have had a lot of help along the way. Nonetheless, it's EXTREMELY expensive (over $12k after all attorney/court/probation fees, more considering the wages I lost during that time) and makes even the simple things horribly inconvenient. I had to move into an apartment within walking distance of work and rely heavily on public transportation. It can also be a severe hindrance to any sort of social life, as women are generally not impressed by the inability to control one's own transportation. Nonetheless, I've been dealing with it for over 4 years and I don't let it bother me, because nobody was ever seriously injured and I'm not in prison. The situation simply "is". Alt Focus: Saying no to friends/going out. In college and even for a few years after, I'd always be either the one getting people to go out drinking on a weeknight or the one who couldn't say no. I couldn't kick the irrational nagging feeling that I'd miss something if I stayed in. I'm so glad I grew up and realized that most often no, I wasn't missing out on anything. I also never thought I'd be able to move somewhere where I didn't know anyone, yet that's what I'm doing in about 2 weeks. I'm hoping it will force me to build a new base of friends who don't spend more time drunk than sober, or rather I'm planning on it.