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Who needs Judge Dredd? We've got Judge Adams!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by WickedBitch, Nov 2, 2011.

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  1. Parker

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    My bad for doing that. You're 100% correct.
     
  2. Binary

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    Completely agreed. This has nothing to do with how the victim in question reacted. Whether she took two days or two decades, there's still a stand-alone question of whether the dad was in the right.

    Which he wasn't.

    Parents who hit their kids are either too cowardly or too lazy to create a proper atmosphere of respect and discipline in a household. I'm not talking about a light spanking for a little kid where the point is really the thought of getting spanked (i.e. you're not beating the kids ass to hurt him or her). If you're doing any kind of discipline by way of hitting to physically hurt your child, you're doing it wrong and frankly, I think you're an idiot. If the argument is, "my kid is a little shit and I'd like to see you control him/her," then you've let it get too far. If the kid is 10 years old and hasn't learned to respect and obey their parents by that point, beating them with a belt isn't going to help anyway.

    If you're beating your kid to try and control them, not only are you not going to gain real control, but whatever control you do gain is going to be extremely temporary at the absolute best, and is not a solution to the problem.
     
  3. Dcc001

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    I hesitate to even weigh in at this point, given how far down the rabbit hole we are. Perhaps a few (hopefully sane) points, and then I'll move on. Some things that occurred to me while reading these exchanges:

    Mothers must also be mothered.
    WickedBitch has been posting here forever, and her tone changed abruptly half way through. I think her initial tone reflects what happens when a parent does not have the support of her community when raising her children. And by "community," I mean older females who care for her (the mother), a partner who shares responsibility with child-rearing and presents a united front to the kids (as opposed to subverting her authority), adequate rest and personal security (including financial). If any or all of these things are lacking, you get what you saw: a frayed woman at the absolute end of her rope with no resources to deal with the overwhelming amount of work three young boys bring. Maybe keep that in mind while condemning. ANYONE can be a good mother on a good night's sleep with money in the bank and a supportive husband. Take away all those things for years and years and tell me how you fare.

    Spanking should be done very sparingly, at a young age, to convey absolute authority.
    I was spanked - according to my parents - perhaps five times. I remember only one. They used spanking on me the way I used a rolled up magazine with my dogs. One good hit that did no damage and caused no pain, but was delivered at a young enough age that the lesson "No means fucking no," was conveyed deep down into the animal brain.

    Not to hurt. Not to extract revenge. Not to vent frustrations. Not as a daily disciplining tool. That shit doesn't work.

    If you want your children to respect you, you must respect them.
    Even little wee kids. This does not mean allowing them to run wild, or eat only green things, or in any way call the shots. It means you must acknowledge and honour their needs, as they need things. Sometimes they need discipline. But sometimes they need knowledge, or love, or compassion. A good parent knows when to administer to all needs, as the child needs them.
     
  4. Volo

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    Finally, a bit of fuckin' reason instead of complete and utterly blind condemnation.

    Yeah, WickedBitch has a couple of fucked up viewpoints, but they come from somewhere. All that shit didn't just fall out of the fuckin' sky. Discipline ain't easy, even when things are running smooth on all ends. It sure as hell aint easy when you don't have shit going for you. And, if you happen to be one of us many who got your asses kicked as a child when you fucked up, you'll pardon us for teetering on that side of the debate, won't you?

    Christ sakes people, we all fuck up. Sometimes royally. Yes, we deserve the call outs, the shame, the humiliation, but be fuckin' reasonable. Almost all I've read here was a goddamn dogpile* on an overly taxed woman. Either offer some sound advice on the subject, or shut the fuck up. Five pages of the same parroting shit isn't helping.

    *You know who you are, and who you aren't.
     
  5. Dcc001

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    EDIT: It's early, and I'm an idiot and read a comment wrong. Continue on, folks...nothing to see here.

    [​IMG]
     
  6. nogro

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    I just want to weigh in here and say that where I live, spanking is almost unheard of. I was only spanked once and my father apologized profusely afterwards, him having been beaten himself when he was growing up. I was raised without any form of verbal or non-verbal abuse (I have to be honest: I consider spanking abuse), just appropriate disciplinary action. Also, you do realize that a tantrum-throwing two year-old is just going through his natural development process, testing his boundaries and asserting his own identity? It`s not like that shit lasts forever, just deal with it until it passes. As Aetius pointed out, children aren`t goddamned Pavlov`s dogs; they won`t simply associate negative behaviour with spankings/beatings; they`ll just be fucking scared of you.


    Also, that video was so awful I almost couldn`t stomach it. Who continues beating their child while they cry and beg for mercy?
     
  7. Queen-Bee

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    I had a dream about the video. I haven't even watched it. While I said I was going to put all of this out of my head until Monday, I haven't stoppped thinking about it. Reading the above poster mention begging for mercy made me jump out of my chair and flee to the next room. I'm shaking, in tears and my stomach is in a knot. Please people, tell me again why you would intentionally inflict pain on those you love the most.
     
  8. DrFrylock

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    Seriously. That chick must have installed KaZaA on her dad's computer like five times after he told her to cut it out and that it was pissing him off. Why would she do a thing like that?
     
  9. Juice

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    Id beat her just on principle for using a spyware magnet like KaZaA
     
  10. rbz90

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    Or maybe he just didn't like the music she downloaded. Be honest if you caught your kid downloading the best of Kenny G you'd be obliged to give them the ol' 1 2 as a good parent. Seriously though what that guy did was not discipline it was abuse. Louis CK had some pretty funny views on beating your kids and as someone that got hit when I was younger he pretty much hit it on the head for me. I didn't behave better I just started lying to my parents so i don't get caught.

     
    #110 rbz90, Nov 5, 2011
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  11. wexton

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  12. Frank

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    Crazy, it's almost as if they had a law set up to prevent prosecuting someone after a certain amount of time has elapsed after the crime!
     
  13. shimmered

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    You can't bring anger into discipline...then it's not discipline, it's retaliation.

    Should more parents be more consistent with discipline? Absolutely.
    Could more parents take the time to actually establish and enforce boundaries? Undeniably.
    Do all children need corporal punishment? Nope.

    I don't have a problem with swatting a kid. I just almost never do it. I wouldn't punch a coworker in the face for being a dick, so I'd rather exact consequences that tie into the infraction. I almost never give an emotional response to an outburst. I have standards of behavior and expect them to be maintained. There are expectations for our household. They're not anything I make a big deal of, they just exist. I don't speak down to my kids, and I try my damnedest to teach them problem solving skills. (I'm thirsty - get a drink/I'm out of socks - well put them in the laundry so I can have them cleaned/I'm hungry - Food's in the kitchen type of stuff.) As a result, I rarely have to do more than raise an eyebrow. My kids are well behaved, clean, respectful, and active.

    I don't have the issues other parents have, and I'm fine with that.
     
  14. Omegaham

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    Download all the music you want. Download KaZaA? You'd better start running to somewhere with witnesses, because I'm gonna fucking get you.
     
  15. sartirious

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    Hitler had a couple of fucked up viewpoints too, and they didn't come out of a vacuum - National Socialism was a direct result of the circumstances that the Weimarer Republik dealt with after World War I. Just because you can figure out the cause, doesn't mean the effect is any more legitimate - it's still fucked up, and I'm not going to pardon child abuse for anyone, anytime, anywhere.

    I don't care *why* you are beating your kids, all that matters is YOU BEAT YOUR KIDS.

    I saw that too, and while it's disappointing - hopefully it will prompt a change in legislation. Either way, this abuser's life in America is effectively over. I can't imagine him ever going out to eat again, or going to buy toilet paper, or even talking with coworkers around the water cooler - he's essentially a pariah: not as bad as a pedophile, but he's been painted with the same brush.
     
  16. suapyg

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    Well, it could be worse. He could be named Sandusky.
     
  17. Parker

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    To keep my red dot parade going, I have to say, if he stays in Texas, he'll be fine. Texas is the capital of capital punishment. If you kill someone and more than 3 people saw you do it, you're getting the death penalty in less than a week? Also you can also shoot someone if you find them in bed with your husband/wife in your house? I can tell you half the Texas population looked at that video and thought nothing wrong.

    Him being a pariah is far from the reality, he still has his job either. I doubt you'll hear about any local Texas movements to get him removed either. He might get reelected as he is "tough" on the law.
     
  18. Aetius

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    So I was listening to talk radio on the drive home (why do I do this to myself?) and they were discussing the case. One woman calls in and relays an anecdote about how she caught her daughter lying and so she slapped her in the mouth. The daughter then picked up the phone threatening to call CPS and the mother responded "If you call CPS the next call you better make is to an ambulance, because if I'm going away for abuse, you better believe it's going to be for abuse."

    Charming.
     
  19. RCGT

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    #119 RCGT, Nov 7, 2011
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  20. Parker

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    MY MOM SAID THAT ALL THE TIME!
     
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