Who needs Judge Dredd? We've got Judge Adams!

wicked witch = my mother

Any similarity in the name is purely coincidental.

 

I think what she is trying to say is that her mother abused her as a child and she hasn't spoken to her mother in over 7 years, hates her guts, will one day piss on her corpse rotting in the ground.

 

I read the focus of this thread and started giggling, as I've had this conversation 100 times. Child abuse is wrong and it should never ever happen. Whoopin' yo kids? That shit needs to happen a lot more especially when they start swearing or making a scene trying to embarass you. There is a huge difference between the two.

In regards to this video. The people who have never been spanked get outraged, look up the number to DCFS and freak out. They will never understand and can't understand. Talking to people who were put in time-out is really a waste of time. The people that have been abused start having flashbacks and can't think about it rationally as it was a traumatic experience. Both are fair responses given the upbringing. Calling WB crazy, traumatized, needs therapy and saying "Oh she needs helps, she's this and that" is completely unfair and insane.

On the flip side, if two people who've been spanked start talking, they'll try to one-up the other on who got the worse asswhoopin', laugh about it and move on.

They even preach proper spankings in my church going on the "spare the rod, spoil the child" teachings, with a twist "Never with your hands parents, as the hands are for nurturing." Christian Methodist church in the middle of Chicago, not some crazy cult shit either.

Its the reasoning for the ass-whooping. My parents didn't come home angry or drunk and just beat me willy nilly. They weren't pre-emptive either. They were in response to bad behavior as they should be.
I got bad grades - asswhoopin'.
I ate icecream when they told me not to leading to me not eating dinner - asswhoopin'.
I lied about doing chores or staying out past curfew - asswhoopin'.
Start throwing a tantrum in public to get my way for like a toy or candy - asswhoopin'.
I never swore at my parents, that'd mean death, but if I swore in the general vacinity soap in the mouth AND you guessed it - asswhoopin'.

My whole family got their asses whooped until the game changed around 12, 13 or 14. They stopped hurting anymore and the parents got tired. They then gave us allowances, and took those away as punishments. I remember in the height of the Sega era where my mom gave me a choice get an asswhoopin or her take my Sega away for an afternoon. I took the asswhoopin', Sonic 3 just came out, fuck sitting in my room with no entertainment. No one in my family hates their parents. I didn't know people could hate their parents until I got to H.S. and I heard the white kids say it. I remembering telling my mom "You're abusing me!" "I left no marks, no bruises, those were spankings, so there's no abuse." We got whooped for a reason, and we moved on.

I have a personal belief that needs to get researched over any correlation between ADD/ADHD and asswhoopin's. I believe that kids that received asswhoopin's opposed to going into Time-Out without their toys have fewer (or zero) cases of ADD or ADHD. After my 5 minutes or less, I'd get to go back to my toys and Sega. In 30 minutes to an hour, I forgot about the pain. I was not staring in a corner watching dust fly through the air trying to find something to occupy my time. I've never met a person that was spanked and suffered from ADD/ADHD. Just saying.

I read the posts in regards to the video and I thought "OMG, this video is going to be terrible." I watched the video and thought "Sheeeeeiiittttt, are they fucking kidding me?" That's not abuse. That's a good old fashion ass-whooping. The line there is the focus on the whooping. It is on her ass, hence the popular term "ass-whoopin'". Its not on her face, legs, arms, or torso, but they get her squarely on her ass. They kept telling her to bend over and take it on the bottom. Then they calmly talk to her afterwards. Mom and Dad are both talking and agreeing on the procedure, basically playing Good Cop Bad Cop. Abuse? Ridiculous.

I bet if we checked that girls ass right now there wouldn't be an indent, bruise, or scratch from that asswhoopin'. I also bet she didn't swear much again either. I'm sure she was warned "Don't swear or you'll get an asswhoopin'." That wasn't the first time she saw that belt. Her ass and that belt were well acquainted I'm sure. She knew not to say dumb shit, but she set up the camera, said some dumb shit and got it. We forget teenagers act like assholes? Come on now.

I wonder if she likes to get spanked in bed now, but that's a different discussion.

 

I definitely think there's a cultural component to this beyond just what's typical of a given culture, but reading that post all I could think of was this:

 

Nailed it exactly.

 

I do not "beat" my children, no. I have, on occassion, open-hand spanked them on the butt. In fact, we all joke around here about beatings, with my middle son once proclaiming "Ahhhh, the sweet sound of beatings!" Maybe one could argue that it is not the kind of thing to joke about but this is "the most depraved site on the net" and I don't think most of us have room to talk in that department.

My children are well-cared for, well-loved and are polite and well-behaved in public, probably because they know that I won't hesitate to swat them on the ass if they step out of line. That is more than you can say for most of the kids you see out in public these days. If more people took that approach, maybe you wouldn't have shit like this:

http://www.geekologie.com/2011/11/mom-denies-kid-more-pokemon-cards-at-toy.php

I do not need validation about how I raise my kids as they seem to be doing well for the most part, aside from the pre-teen angst of my oldest which is completely normal and being dealt with (in a non belt-wielding manner). I certainly didn't come here looking for any. If my posts led you to believe otherwise, then that is my folly for drinking and posting. Feel free to continue to think I'm a monster though. I'm sure my kids would beg to disagree with you.


*edit* and I would "get help" as you all seem to be parroting, if I had health insurance. My oldest two kids are already in therapy of various sorts and the only thing I need help with is my self-esteem (or total lack thereof). I appreciate the concern though!!!

That was concern, right?!

 

[quote="Parker"

I bet if we checked that girls ass right now there wouldn't be an indent, bruise, or scratch from that asswhoopin'. I also bet she didn't swear much again either. I'm sure she was warned "Don't swear or you'll get an asswhoopin'." That wasn't the first time she saw that belt. Her ass and that belt were well acquainted I'm sure. She knew not to say dumb shit, but she set up the camera, said some dumb shit and got it. We forget teenagers act like assholes? Come on now.

I wonder if she likes to get spanked in bed now, but that's a different discussion.[/quote]

Did you even watch the video before you made this post? Or maybe you're just trolling, because apparently you didn't see the same video the rest of us did. She didn't curse, and most of the belting was on her legs and a couple pretty clearly caught her arms. There was plenty of cursing in the video, but all of that was done by her screaming father. And no shit, she wouldn't have marks now, it was seven fucking years ago. A seven-year-old scar would have to have left her bloody at the time, but apparently you think that would be maybe slightly severe.

Funny thing is, you can't categorize everyone that opposes WB's views and this guy's actions as never having been spanked / beaten to the point of being unable to reason clearly on the subject. I know that putting every opposing viewpoint into two extreme categories and suggesting none of us are capable of making an informed argument makes things convenient for you, but maybe you could be a bit more realistic. I know that when I got spanked, it hurt like hell but it was never nearly to the point of abuse.

By the way, do you have any evidence to support your spanking/ADHD connection theory? Have you even read about the facts of the incident, such as the daughter's disability, the mother backing the claims of abuse?

 

The look on the black guy's face is "Why isn't she beating his ass?" Definitely a cultural thing. Beating = slang for spanking of course. I just took the time since my boss left to read all the posts. With the exception of the "I was actually abused" posts...you guys are overreacting to WB. Counseling? Therapy? I'm sorry, if all parents who spanked and put their backs into it required all of that...just wow. It'd be a massive amount of the minority, especially black, population. I watched the video, he barely raised his voice as compared to the levels I hear some parents yelling at their kids in stores.

I'm sticking with the fact that it was focused all on her butt, with the exception of the misses due to her squirming. This guy was not punching her in the face, kicking her or throwing her into the wall, table or chairs. He was directing her to bend over the bed, to administer the belt. I also noticed he wasn't insulting her calling her names, telling her she was worthless or what not, spanking. They were telling her what she did wrong, that it was wrong, and not to do it or get more.

I forgot to add in that my mom spanked me with a bamboo pool after I did something asshole-ish and she showed us a video of canings in Singapore. I still love my mom and talk to her a lot.

I'm going to chalk this up to a cultural thing. We joke its why minorities asses are bigger (I have a bodonkadonk.)

StayFrosty, nope. It's just a theory, just that. I've talked to a bunch of people that had to take ridilin or other drugs for ADHD/Focus, never spanked. All the kids that have been spanked, no ADD/ADHD. I would love for there to be a national survery/scientific researched headed by an Ivy League, Northwestern Univeristy or University of Chicago.

And no I haven't researched her disability. I watched the video, heard how the parents talked and communicated. They never threatened her life, focused on the padded area of her bottom and then gave her clear instructions for future behavior and left. I watched her for 2-3 minutes and her explanation of why to bring it at the age of 23 and not to the authorities at 18 (while living in a college dorm) is retarded. Could you tell what her disability was? She wasn't in a wheelchair, she speaks clearly, doesn't have downs.

The interview with the judge is more telling, the guy is calm like a guy who really thinks he was just disciplining his daughter, but obviously overwhelmed by the media attention getting him in his car. Also the divorce for the mom could be of total different reasons than the spanking she probably joined in on more than one. She also didn't seem scared of the father in the video, she spoke with the same stern tone he did.

 

Honestly, the way black people I've met talk about asswhoopings you'd think that the black community was the most well behaved community to ever exist. Instead of, y'know, having a massive incarceration problem.

 

Because everybody knows, organized religions are the experts on child-rearing (except the Catholic church. They're the experts on a child's rear.)

So in other words, the ass-whoopings didn't work.

 

Nah. The incarceration problem is due to the sentencing disparity between crack and powder cocaine offenses.

 

Fucking exactly. Maybe racism also which of course has gone away and has NOTHING to do with the incarceration numbers.

Lust, the asswhoopin's worked great for 13 year, until they stopped hurting. Any punishment stops working when there aren't any consequences. So they switched up their punishment to focus what was important at the time for any highschooler, money. Replace "asswhoopin'" with "removed allowance" and there you go. It becomes effective then.

 

Point blank, if you are spanking you have run out of options. And you shouldn't have to run out of options with any child who can reason effectively. That's the difference between spanking at 3 and spanking at 8. And spanking at 14? Seriously?

Here's an idea: if you don't want to send your kid to his room to play video games, DON'T BUY HIM ANY. Your kid is not entitled to a DVD player in the car and a TV in the room. I only got to watch a half-hour of TV a day until I was 11. I wasn't allowed to eat cookies or ice cream or whatever, and my parents wouldn't buy them. I didn't get any video games until I was 13. I never got an allowance, or got paid for chores. Seriously, money for continuing to exist? It seems to be an anathema to Western parents to deprive your kids of these things, but maybe my father had already put the fear of God in me by that point.

 

I share your outrage that all this gang related inner city crime being perpetrated by undisciplined upper middle class white kids is being pinned on properly beaten black teenagers.

 

Wow man, sorry to hear that. All of that, is what I'd consider abuse and not allowing you kid to be a kid. You turned out fine, but I read that and I think I had the reaction most of everyone else did to the video.

As I said before, I'd rather take the spanking then have my Sega taken away.

Let me be clear here, it was a 2 way street. My parents reinforcement went two ways. (Nerd warning) I nailed a band recital, spelling bee or got good grades I was rewarded with video games, toys, pump-up shoes, whatever. I did bad, I got a spanking. My parents aren't deranged. I had Christmas and Birthday parties. Went both ways. This girl did have a computer in her room and the funds for a camcorder. Not like her room was barren with a desk, chair, and bed with one single lightbulb hanging from the ceiling.

Really, no one really questioning that she took her video to the internet and not the police first? Talk about not prioritizing actions right.

 

I'm sorry, I'm really at a loss here man. You're trying to argue that this wasn't abuse? You would rather have your legs beaten with a belt and cursed out, including your father screaming in your face that "I'm going to spank your fucking face" than lose computer privileges? In this case, I guess it doesn't matter, because she got both.

Yes, there's non-physical abuse, too. I get that. My mother used to initiate trivial fights with my little brother, and as soon as he brought up a good point, she would say "I'm done" and retreat to her room. One day he unlocked her bedroom door to continue the argument. Her husband came home and took his bedroom door off the hinges. Punishment fits the crime, yeah? Then he took my brother's bathroom door off the hinges, too. A fourteen year old had to piss and shit with no privacy for nearly a week. That's abuse on a level that seriously damages the psyche. That abuse had my brother sobbing on the floor with a handgun to his head multiple times.

We get it, there's a tradeoff in what works between physical and non-physical punishment. Trying to argue that removal of priviliges such as gaming and toys is abuse on the same level as physical beating is a bit of a stretch though. And maybe removing the computer from the room and letting her spend a week without any computer access would have not only been a far more fitting and effective punishment, it could have been done without screaming at her and leaving her with mental scars that clearly still exist.

Edit: Speaking to the last point of your post, did you not read anything about this? You've shown a blatant ignorance on the topic. Not only has she flat out said she feared retaliation had she released the video while under his roof, by the time she did release it, the statute was over. Maybe she wanted to bury it in the past until the judge started harassing her, and she said "Fuck it, I'm putting it up." Maybe, had you read anything about the story, you'd know that that is almost exactly what happened.

 

I'm not buying that completely. SoL is 7 years am I correct? Why not do this at 21? I knew kids in college that were paying for their own apartments at 19. She looks able bodied to work a job. I'm reading the details, and they all don't make sense. Hence why the questions were asked. And that's what she said...which we can't really take at face value. Putting all the pieces together, she could have acted sooner, and went straight to the police to really get the monkey off her back. And yes this happened for a few years.

Teenagers don't act up once get a punishment, and then never repeat it. Are we forgetting 15-16 is the height of teenage rebellion/asshole behavior? That's common knowledge, don't need Parenting Today to know that.

Your parents never screamed at you? Was every scream emotional and mental abuse? My brother had his door taken off, he's fine. We got spanked on our asses and when we squirmed, received some hits. No bruises were left, no welts I had to get treated for. We rubbed the spot for a few minutes and went about our days. We never screamed abuse. We both turned out with college degrees, jobs, clean jail records, and no problems. She was 16, you never hear curse words at 16? Come on. I was threatened with way worse in 8th grade by other students. How soft are kids getting?

How old is 16 really is the question we need to ask? Start at 0:45



Summary: Elizabeth Smart. 15, kidnapped 8 miles away from her house. Was gone for half a year? All over the news, milk cartons the works. The captors left her, didn't even lock her inside. Said "Don't leave, we'll kill you." Same time, 7 year old girl, kidnapped by crackheads, tied up with rope. She chews through and escapes. Had her captors in jail in 45 minutes. "Kidnapped and home in time to watch herself on the news!" Come on now. How old is 15 really? We look at ES and think "OMG, 15 is so young." Then a black 15 year old kid accidentally kills someone while playing around wrestling doing a move he saw on WWE and he gets tried as an adult gets life in jail...yeah 15, what the fuck.

This reminds me of the Alec Baldwin phone call. Everyone was like "Omg how do you talk to your child like that?" Maybe the child was being an asshole and needed to be talked to like an asshole. Children, especially teenagers, aren't perfect angels. If these conversational, non-spanking, punishments worked so well on everyone equally, they'd be employed.

ALSO THIS IS TEXAS! They have a fast track to the death penalty! Hello! Come on now! Capital punishment is THEIR thing. Spanking is probably the norm down there.

 

Okay, I quietly backed out of the room early on in this thread because there's a whole lot of crazy on either side of the spectrum coming up, but for god's sake, can everyone stop with the victim blaming?

How long it takes for a victim to react and how they chose to do so doesn't have anything to do with qualifying something as abuse or not.