What kind of dressing would you like on your salad?

Where is the "I haven't done it and don't want to. Ewww, icky" option.

Edit: Oh sure, add it now after I already voted.

 

It just seemed like the best choice out of the options given.

 

I had a talk about this in a post coital conversation with my girlfriend last night. Neither of us wants to try it in the slightest. The idea of putting ones tongue up an arse just confuses me. How is that a good idea? How is it a nice thing to do to someone? Why would you want a sexual partner to have their face buried in your crack? so many questions...

 

Yessir. I've eaten at this particular establishment. I guess it was more on the lines of scratching things off my to do list sexually. But then she liked it. The taboo nature of what I was doing made it hot and was initially what made me even want to attempt it. However my being a repeat offender was purely based on the reaction of my sexual partner at the time. Oh, that and as previously mentioned it was very very clean.

 

One morning after a shower, the girlfriend and I were getting busy on the bed and while I was going down on her I had a thought:

"I wonder if she'd like it my tongue went a little lower."

A few weeks prior to this sexual encounter, my buddy raved to me over the phone how much his girlfriend liked getting her ass licked. He admitted that he had done it for her, and that he didn't mind it so long as she was clean.

So without any questioning, I simply lowered my head some, and continued pleasing her orally. She seemed to enjoy it. There was no awkward pause, no questioning of why I was down there, and two - three minutes later I stopped and went back up and finished the job.

I've maybe tried it twice since then, and both times it's yielded similar results.

However I would feel incredibly uncomfortable if she ever tried to return the favor.

 

The Ass in General is.. I think Taboo might be a bit strong. More of a Whispered subject. Fucking or licking, it is just not talked about. I think Most Women have experienced the lost licker.... They Kind of loose their way and Depending on your Level of Sexual Experience and openness you either keep your mouth Shut and enjoy, or freak out... I'm more of a Shut your Mouth and enjoy type... I would never ask for it, but It is not an unpleasant experience.

 

Here I was all set to debate the merits of Catalina and French vs. your traditional Caesar/Ranch/Vinaigrettes.

I realize I'm probably in the minority here, but I've never had the urge to stick my tongue or dick into a poop chute. Maybe I like the comfort, temperature and moisture of pussy too much, maybe I'm terrified of pulling my dick out and seeing a turd nugget attached to my dickhead. Whatever it is, I've never tried anal or tossing salad, either giving or receiving, nor do I see myself doing it anytime in the near future.

 

I am not giving in this regard, most likely due to mens' obsession with how much they shit and sharing that info with everyone in the vicinity. I am not opposed to receiving, however.

 

My fiance farts WAY too much. She a beautiful woman, and her gas is down-right manly (and she giggles like a little girl afterward; deserves a high five). I would be entirely open to trying it on her (I'm open to trying anything once), if not for this reason only. I'm lucky enough just when I get her not to fart during sex. If my tongue was in there... I think she'd take it as a challenge.

As for me, there's no way in HELL anything gets even close to my butt hole. End of story.

 

I'm not sure I could have handled eating a fart, but I've tossed some salad despite. Several times to one girl. There is no way in hell I would do this with anyone but a regular with upstanding personal hygiene. Her ass had no taste whatsoever; just tasted like skin. She had no grains, no hair, thank fucking Christ no tiny, rolled joints of old toilet paper. Think of all the other ways this could go wrong. What if she farts? What if she had Mexican for lunch and didn't tell me? But she enjoyed it. Really enjoyed it. I have never seen a girl cum so hard in my life. That turned me on and I definitely have a kink for it now. As long as it's clean I'll chew that sewer any which way. Hop on.

The taboo issue probably is what makes it so popular. "Normal" sex gets boring. I don't really see this as much of a big deal anyway. Definitely shakes things up; dirty in the good kind of way if it goes right. Making out afterwards is kind of funny. It doesn't readily cross your mind that she just ATM'd herself.

However I do NOT want it done to me. Just out of common courtesy. A woman is a fresh, clean, dainty rose (fuck you, I've convinced myself LA LA LA LA LA LA). I am a fucking greasy sasquatch. Unless she knows the score there is no way I could in good conscience let someone betwix my hairy hams.

 

I've done it and had it done. I enjoy doing it as long as she's freshly-showered (obviously), and receiving is great as well--partly the physical feeling, but also the taboo/domination aspect.

 

I really like kissing. So there's no way I want her tongue to be in my mouth after it's been in my ass. Conversely, there's no way I'm sticking my tongue in anyone else's ass. So that's a no on both accounts.

 

You all are way too uptight about this.

You aren't deep-throating asshole or anything. Just slip the tip of your tongue inside (inside a CLEAN ass, mind you), about what I would consider first-knuckle deep. It feels nice.

 

Hidden Valley Ranch. End of discussion.


Focus:
I have not done it. Don't really plan to in the future. If I did, it would have to be, as others have mentioned, right after a shower.

And there is no way I could in good conscience let a girl do that to me. I'm a hairy guy. I try to keep things in order, but no matter what, I just can't see that being pleasant for her, even if I would enjoy it.

 

I've had it done to me by a couple guys and it feels great. I mean, it's just a cool physical sensation. It just plain feels good.

I haven't given it to anyone yet, simply because no one has asked and it's never occurred to me. But now I'm starting to get curious. In fact, the next time I hook up with a girl I'm gonna do it. I'm not gonna ask first, I'm just gonna dive headfirst into her anus and see what happens.

(No typo - I did in fact allude to sex with both genders. And I'm recommending that if anyone here is even slightly bi-curious, go get your ass eaten by a gay guy. They really like doing it (at least, if you're handsome like me) and as I said in my first sentence, it feels great).

 

See, this is where a little recon is necessary before diving in. If things aren't sparkling, its a no go. If she's squeaky clean it's all part of the fun. While I've had it done to me, I'm not a big fan of having my salad tossed. In fact, I'm not sure why any woman would want to toss my hairy salad.

Maybe I've shared a little too much here.

edit:

Try Rainbows and Unicorns

 

Swallowing a lumpy bit is sometimes just what you need to knock that loose ass-hair from the back of your throat.

The circle of life, my friend.