So, this is going to be a two in one thread if bumped. I'm throwing a bachelor party in Toronto for my friend and we are looking to do a checklist of sorts for him. I have scoured the Internet and have found the generic ones, but I figure with the brains and depravity on this board we can come up with something awesome. I do preface this with a warning that we are not going to a strip club but will be bar hopping through out the night. Anything you jackals can come up with will be appreciated Focus 2: Tell us about your hilarious bachelor/bachelorette experiences! Lap dances with a lipstick necklace you had to explain to your wife to be? Hickeys on your nipples from a post op tranny? and remember; bring the funny!
I think one of my favourites happened a friend's batch party in Niagara Falls (we stayed at JD The Hero's hotel as always) a few friends and I were walking into the Fallsview casino when some girl for seemingly no reason at all ran up to us and started screaming profanities and insults at us. We had never seen this crazy hen before, so I told her to leave us alone and she started thrashing me like I killed her parents or something. For no reason, I couldn't fucking believe my eyes. She wasn't exactly doing a good job of it and she was small, so I scooped her up and dropped her into the giant fountain in front of the casino in front of a LOT of people. She deserved worse, and sure enough a couple of guys tried to be heroes against the "guy who attacked a girl", but my friends very quickly made them go away. The point is, I made her cry from being soaked and humilated and THAT is what you call a "storybook ending" to a fun night.
Had a bachelor party a few years back for wedding no one went to. The groom an bride changed their mind at the last minute to move the wedding to Barcelona and were appalled when no one showed up. The bachelor party was fun until the strippers showed up at 3AM. The first thing they did was whip out a bag of coke and started snorting it off my friends glass coffee table in front of us. They must have been in their late 30s and had faces that looked like raw hide and cessarian scars on their stomachs. They were probably actually hookers since they were full contact complete with fingering and all (not my cup of tea though). They even offered to fuck us, which a couple guys took them up on but later regretted. Their final act was when their bouncer laid on the ground and they squatted over his face and peed all over him an into his mouth. Then they got in their Escalade and drove away. So yeah, get strippers.
I'm having a hard time understanding a bachelor party without purchased females. If you're going bar hopping isn't that just a Saturday night?
My bachelor party a couple of months ago was a lot of fun. It was pretty low key, and no strippers. I played golf in a full length wedding dress, then at dinner it got cut down to a nice knee length dress with a steak knife. We went to the bar after dinner that ended up having 6 bachelorette parties at the same time. I was groped, grinded on, and manhandled far more than what would have happened in any strip club. Those girls were crazy. One of the best things I ever saw happen to a bachelor was when I saw a guy dressed up in wrestling tights with a Mexican wrestling mask, a guitar, and sign that said "On my bachelor party, I have to busk until I make $50.00" About 8 of his buddies were standing around him laughing and drinking beers.
My bachelor party is in 3 weeks, it's at Myrtle Beach and there will most definitely be strippers involved, my brother makes decent coin so he picked up the tab on the condo. I don't get bachelor party's that just go to the same bars you would normally go to, as stated isn't that just a regular night? If any of you are looking for the better fully nude joints in Myrtle be sure to hit Dairy Aires, it's 20 bucks to get in but you can bring coolers full of booze in, last time I was there I went with the old lady and her mother...... Good times
The guys I am going with just don't do the strip club thing, never have never will, so going to a jays game and bar hopping in Toronto is their idea of a good night.
My bachelor party was stereotypically held in Vegas. A full-on story isn't warranted, but I think some bullet points may be entertaining. - Months before the trip, I demanded that I wanted boobs in my face on Easter Sunday. Twelve of my friends obliged. We all had a hard time explaining it to our wives, girlfriends and families. One of my friends told his mom he was going to a bachelor party over Easter weekend and wouldn't be able to go home and visit. "Your whole life is a bachelor party," she responded. - We asked every Southwest employee from the parking shuttle (there were two on there for some reason) to the gate if they had any drink tickets. Using this straight-forward method, we gathered 7 free tickets before the flight even took off. Seriously, just ask an employee at the gate - they'll likely find some for you. - I decided to ask every cab driver in Vegas what the craziest thing they've ever seen is, as I do anytime I'm in a cab anywhere. There were several good stories, but the standout was after an early morning ride from the Tropicana back to our hotel. The 400lb driver told us a story we will never, ever forget. I'll spare everyone the details, but in short, he described how he saw a naked woman flee from a building as a man chased her and shot her dead - apparently he had been raping her. Obviously it's a terrible story, but we coined the term "murder rapes" from it, which we still use today. I'm sorry. - At the Spearmint Rhino, my friends purchased more than 20 lap dances for me. Eventually I just started asking strippers if they were paid for. If they said no, I told them to leave. I also rated each dance and never gave any of them over a 4 out of 10 just to get their reactions. Also, a stripper slipped while dancing on me and kicked my head into a wrought iron gate. It's also important to note that I was wearing my wife's white "BRIDE" hat from her bachelorette party held weeks prior. - At the strip club, for reasons unknown, I repeatedly demanded that Miami Sound Machine's "Conga" be played. The DJ refused until my friend (and best man) paid him $40. That's right, $40 for one stupid song just to shut me up. He also requested Bohemian Rhapsody and several other 5-minute plus songs and the DJ replied, "I know what you're trying to do." - One of my friends came out of the Champagne Room arm in arm with a stripper. They walked over to our group and the stripper, looking mildly disturbed said, "Your friend is a pervert." That's right, a Vegas stripper called him a pervert. - At brunch, a friend decided it might be a good idea to add half a bottle of 5-Hour Energy to a screwdriver. He was really, really right. I'm sure it's been done before, but we decided to call it a 5-wood - get it, instead of a screwDRIVER? Anyway, we still make them all the time. - On the cab ride to the airport to go home, a friend (the pervert one) was farting so much that the cabbie pulled over and screamed at him, "Does my cab look like a toilet?!" Many more fun things happened, but these were the main highlights I remember off the top of my head from my Bachelor Party about 3 years ago.