Well ... this could be a mistake, but what the hell.

Preach. I have way too many female friends that don't think that guy's friends are seeing their shit. One of my female friends started dating my best friend. Of course I saw the pictures. Then I decided to fuck with her later like "You shouldn't ever send pictures to guys, his friends will always see it." She then denied ever sending pictures
and then ended with "If I did see them, the guys would never show them." Another friend sent pictures to a guy, then ended up on his computer to find her pictures neatly organized in a file, along with every other girl he's dated and some he met on the internet. Yes, all of his friends viewed his collection.

Focus: What an idiot for him to send to this girl? It is odd he'd keep meticulous notes and didn't take that list to his grave. I'm not even sure I'd talk to my friends much about it. But hey at least he's good looking enough to get those many dates and have a reason for the spreadsheet.

 

Wait, you're saying this is normal? Am I the only one who thinks this is a pretty big asshole thing to do? I mean unless I was looking for revenge or something, I sure as fuck wouldn't show naked pics a girlfriend sent to me to anyone, let alone my buddies.

 

I don't really get why someone would do it, but I don't think it's that creepy or douchey either. Just kind of...pointless. Bringing it up on a date AND freakin sending it is just stupid though.

FOCUS: Not nearly as dumb as that guy, but I sabotaged myself on a date a few years ago. Was working weekends in radio and managed to flirt/make small talk with our Sunday fill-in secretary. She was one of those super rare smoking hot girls (an easy 10 on anyone's scale) who somehow didn't have a trace of snobiness/bitchiness, even towards the super creepy listeners/contest winners that would come in just to talk/creep on her. So after a few weeks of chatting and using her for bits on air, I finally landed a date. Didn't have hard plans so we went out for dinner. Things went well so we decided to keep going. She said she was down for whatever (not sexual ya pervs), so it was up to me, and for some fucking reason, instead of heading to the bar district and spending one-on-one time showing off my wicked-awesome personality, I took her to what turned out to be the equivalent of a high school parent's basment party at my buddy's place. It was lame on all fronts, and didn't make for good date chemistry at all. I think, in my young(er) and stupid(er) mindset, I wanted to show her off to people I only kind of knew. After a promising start, the rest of the night was just...off.

So that was bad enough, but cut to the next night, I'm out at the bar district with a different buddy, and we're chatting with these two girls. I get up for some drinks, come back, and my buddy, pointing at one of the girls, goes: "Guess what, she's (girl-I-went-on-date-with's) sister."

My mind goes completely blank.

"She's who's sister?"

He repeats her name, which happens to be the same name as a girl we went to college with years prior, so I say, "Oh, you mean (girl from years prior)?"

Buddy pauses, looks at me with complete disappointment and says, "No, dude...the girl you went out with."

"Huh? When?"

Which is when her sister says, with a look of disdain, "Last night."

After a few awkward pleasantries, they were on their way. I did not hear from either sister again.

 

I know a guy who has a spreadsheet for online dating. But it's not for memory; it's for tweaking his profile. He'll bomb like 50-100 girls or something every 6 months all during one weekend, combing for another fuck buddy or two.

He'll track what message/ profile he used and the results, like some sort of A/B or means testing.

While maybe a bit creepy, meh. Businesses do it. I at least see the reason behind it.



But for logging the pictures and data on 12 girls? Who gives a shit.

I do the same thing - it's called my fucking memory. Get a date? Throw it on the calendar or just fucking remember.

Next thing we're going to see this guy with a spreadsheet on when to do his own household chores, what he ate last night, and the next time he's going to take a dump, color coded red for after eating the Spicy Thai sauce at Buffalo Wild Wings.


I would NOT hire this guy in any office, because all the data he's logging is pointless --- has a rocking bod, is from Bumblefuck, Iowa, will we bang later??

These aren't necessary details to log. Go on a date, look her over, let's be honest even if she's a 5 you'll probably try to pork her anyway.

 

Wow, I don't think of myself as a particularly ethical person, but if somebody sends me something with the caveat that its private, then it stays private.

I can quite honestly say that I've never shown any naked picture I've received to a friend.

 

I agree with you there. Making private photos public without the other person's consent is too great a breach of ethics to be described simply as a "major dick move". Violating that trust just so you can show off to your friends (without your partner's consent)?

From a purely logical, amoral point of view: why would you willingly jeopardize the chance of receiving future pictures on the off chance that one of your friends either doesn't keep his mouth shut or has a conscience? It seems like the risks far outweigh the rewards.



The spreadsheet's an excellent way for him to keep organized. Not what I'd do, but I haven't concurrently dated as many people as this guy has. Sending it out is a pretty foolish thing to do, unless he was hoping to attract that rare female that both loves organizational efficiency and being numerically rated on her looks.

 

I also keep a dating spreadsheet, and I hung it on the wall in the kitchen. It has the names of the days of the week divided into columns, and then the rows detail exactly what day of the month it is. I write my dates in, to stay organised. So this guy threw some extra comments in his and used the excel equivalent of a highlighter, big deal.

 

I don't find it offensive, but more hilariously socially awkward and nerdy. He's the same type of dude who would fit right into the PUA community where people are loving numerically explaining how they effectively reached the 3rd stage of IOI with a hard 7.5 after opening a 3 set.

Part of me sort of loses perspective on points like this cause my memory was seemingly made for stuff like this. I can relay personal details about girls I went on a single date with 3 years ago. Meanwhile my roommate, who would totally make a spreadsheet like this, once asked me for the name of a girl he had hooked up with for a month or so less than 6 months before. *shrug*

I think the date of online contact was the most useful portion. Its like Salesforce for dating.

 

A local police officer was just suspended because the woman he had an affair with turned in her "journal" to his bosses when he tried to end the relationship:

A woman says she had sex with Officer David McCann when he was on the clock — and has the journal to prove it.

McCann, whose suspension is costing him about $8,000, had sex with Kingfield 36 times while on duty after meeting her in April 2009, Glennon's report said.

When the romance soured last summer, Kingfield turned her journal over to the Sunrise Police Department along with a detailed spreadsheet to show McCann had sex with her while on duty. Kingfield noted the days and hours they were together, including whether they had "nooner sex" or "quality sex."

 

If you assume your boyfriend is going to show your naked pics to his friends, you probably shouldn't be dating such a huge asshole.

 

I usually assume guys do it out of spite of the relationship being over. You can't really say anything to them anymore, so it's a secret "fuck you" that has a nasty of habit of NEVER staying private. I'm pretty sure a lot of the times girls will never have that assumption as you mentioned. Crime of ex-passion.

 

Well, I guess I should accept that there are most definitely very graphic pictures around of me. Oops?

 

It's so easy. All you have to do is post them on the internets then assuage everyone's guilt by saying 'permission granted'.

 

As others have noted, I'm not sure how else the guy could have successfully managed talking to 12 girls at once without getting their names, jobs, and personal info confused.

Hell, the most girls I was ever talking to or seeing at one time on a dating website was 3, and even then, it was difficult to keep everything straight. In fact, after thinking that a girl who worked in PR was working at a Jamba Juice instead, I had to start writing down names, phone numbers, jobs, and interests in a Notepad document.

It wasn't anywhere near as meticulous as what this guy did, but then again, it was only a quarter of the women! As others have noted, his only mistake was assuming that sending it to a girl was a good idea. OF COURSE she is going to send that to a bunch of her friends.

Still, it must have been a slow news day if this made the rounds. Not even adding the unnecessary "creepy" is going to fool people, Media.