Weekend Drunk Thread, 6/7

My wife would blow Blake Shelton in the middle of the street if he would let her, needless to say I hear his music way more than most people on this board.

 

I have a much bigger crush on his wife.

 

Depends, were you invited or not?

 

Mine too, but my wife just think he looks good, so I dont have to hear his music.

 

Weird. Up until this point, I was under the impression Shelton was a kind of funny looking guy who had inexplicably convinced a stone cold fox to marry him.

 

Is that actually a thing? Meat on a fired grill is what BBQ is to me.

 

That's actually what he means, I think. There is a large group of people who get really mad if you "confuse" grilling with barbecue.

 

It's like confusing Cajun and Creole cuisine. No one in New Orleans really cares, but go down to Cajun country and ask them why their jambalaya isn't red and you're likely to end up as bait in a crab trap.

 

So, you know when people get mad at other people for liking certain types of beer or wine or music or whatever because that first group of people perceives liking certain things and not liking other things as snobbery or elitism or pretentiousness?

What you two just did is not any different from that.

Anyways, I bought a Big Green Egg. I'm aware of the hair-splitting involved between "grilling" and "barbecue". In the particular part of the world where I grew up, a "barbecue" is "a device that uses fire to cook things, is used outdoors, and generally contains a lid". I know, I know, it's not nearly exclusive enough of a definition. Do I have enough real hipster... er, sorry, barbecue cred for having bought an outdoor fire-based cooking device with a lid that uses charcoal to make its fire? Am I allowed to sit with the cool kids in the back of the bus because I can cook with smoke over low indirect heat for prolonged periods of time? Golly I hope I am.

 

Maybe, but at least they did it with a combination of only three sentences.

 

Obviously no.

 

Crown, would you consider a steak to be barbeque? What about a burger?

 

Something comes to mind about things going around and coming around. Anyway, grilling is cooking food on a grill. Barbecue is a style of smoked, slow-cooked meat and if you think that's hair splitting you must be talking about the kind found on a bush of dixiebandit's preference.

 

I'm aware of this. It's just that in Canada, a variety of things (a "grill", a "barbecue", whatever...) are lumped under the term "barbecue" and any food cooked on it is said to be "barbecued". The sticking point is that we don't use the word "barbecue" to describe the food you make on a barbecue. We also don't do much in the way of slow-cooked, smoked meat (except in Montreal). The only time to get decent ribs or pulled pork is when there are ribfests and those big American rigs come into town. Aside from that, any ribs you order in a restaurant are more likely to have been braised than anything else.

 

I found a dress, and I'm kind of in love with it. Navy with orange cherries and a cut-out back? Yes, please!

 

This perfectly describes my feelings when I found the spider in my shower:

 

You guise I'm actually super drunk. Dammit alcohol allergy why can't I process alcohol like a normal person.

 

You're lucky. I apparently have the liver version of Superman, because it takes a LOT to get me truly drunk, and on top of that, general pain medications (advil, tylenol) do nothing. Codine? Nothing. Hell, I've been given morphine and had it do nothing. My wife (who is much smarter than me, especially when it comes to drugs) said it has something to do with how I metabolize drugs and alcohol.

On the bright side, no hangovers!

Seriously, though, I'm 3/4ths of the way into a bottle of rum and I'm feeling it now. Good stuff.