I haven't laughed that hard in years. Elephants are worthless animals and if they all went extinct tomorrow I wouldn't bat an eyelash.
Can you imagine Samuel L Jackson playing him in the movie version? "Listen to these muthuhfuckin' fish eat my gattdamn friends!" This makes me think of inappropriately cast roles for biopics, which would be better than the real thing. Lindsay Lohan as Princess Di. Charlie Sheen as Abraham Lincoln. Instead of dying he uses tiger blood to dodge Booth's bullet then fires chlamydia beams out of his eyes. Woody Allen as JFK. "This is, err, uhm, the most fun I've, uhm, had as President with my pants on." Ryan Reynolds as Jesus because SICK FUCKING ABS. Adam Sandler, this summer, is... Gandhi. Someone call Hollywood. Use the red phone, this is urgent.
Arnold coming back as the Terminator....... Oh that's really happening? Arnold coming back in a twins sequel with devito? And Eddie Murphy playing the long lost brother? That's also happening.... Eddie Murphy will never make another R rated funny movie again, which is too bad because 48 hours is hilarious.
Get him to play Martin Luther King, Jr. and I will beg you to take my $10. As per the drunk thread, this made me blush. From 10 Great Beer Cocktails: Hangman's Blood Ingredients: 2 fingers of Gin 2 fingers of WWhisky 2 fingers of Rum 2 fingers of Port 2 fingers of Brandy 1 bottle (or can) of Stout 1 splash of Champagne I'm getting drunk just reading that. I also really, really want to try it.
Two points of order: - Krispy had to change his name. Legal stuff re: doughnuts. - Kate Upton is beautiful, even without hips. But, just Google image for Emily Ratajkowski or Natasha Kuznetsova. That is all.
It is Summer. The college bars here skew up in age when school's out. I have recently reached the general age range where I can be the old dude at a bar. It sucks. Real bad.
Jesus, is Chris Berman good at announcing anything? His suckage at football announcing is well known, but he's absolutely horrible with golf. I swear to God, I must be getting old, because I am at the verge of not bothering to watch Phillies games because Gary Mathews sucks so bad, and I really have had it with Berman in the ten minutes he's been on, and I was really looking forward to this U.S. Open, being held right outside Philly.
Im 5'5 unless Im going bald I still look like Im 22ish. I also didn't happen to go to Colorado U like the rest of you 6'12 dudes seem to have....
To continue with the Florida discussion; a guy and his son believe they crossed paths with the elusive skunk ape down in the 'glades. Only in Florida.
I frequently jerk off to the thought of driving a fully loaded cement truck over his body repeatedly. "Masrshall! Marshall! Marshall!!!" could have killed a lab rat in seconds. Not to mention his umpteen jillionth use of "fumbling..bumbling...stumbling..." Fuck. Get diabetes and die. He turned the home run derby into the most muted event in sports.
That shit, along with that "pizza crust stuffed with hotdogs" is all yours, Muricah. All yours. Dear Past Angel from 6 hours ago: Don't second guess yourself. Go out, buy vodka and spike your Gatorade. Present Angel is dying after drinking canned Molson Canadian off the beer cart all afternoon. Sincerely, The girl moaning in the corner.
I refuse to speak for fucking poutine. This recent push to turn it into a national emblem is just fucking sad. It's a multi-thousand calory artery-clogging wheel of grease and vegetable oil that tastes good to some. Put it on the fucking flag why don't you.
Well, ask yourself whether or not this would sell in America? It's not Pizza Hut's fault, they just give customers what they want.