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[WDT] HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY [NSFW]

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by bewildered, May 11, 2018.

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  1. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Deeply satisfied pooper

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    It seems like a good idea to take care of this before I lose my sobriety.
    Here's to all the moms out there!

    [​IMG]

    The best part of the picture is the gravity defying shadow boob located somewhere in her clavicle.


    We'll be giving my mom some pink peonies because they are her favorite and they won't grow around here.
    [​IMG]

    We'll head over to the Cracker Barrel. She always brings her flowers in and carries the vase around, and then sets them on the table as the centerpiece for our table of 12-15. She loves showing them off.


    Focus: Any mother's day traditions? No? It's ok if you have mommy issues, we are here to hear about them and support you during this difficult time.

    Alt Focus: May 12:
    National Odometer Day
    National Limerick Day

    This Saturday is National Odometer Day
    and maybe that day I'll pray
    to the god of high mileage
    to keep the wheels on it
    So that I don't die behind the wheel today

    I'm sure you can do better. The best limerick gets a special gold star from me.
     
  2. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    Bewildered started a garden
    To show TIB she's just a little bit smarter
    Than everyone else, these plebes with canned food
    Meanwhile @Rush-O-Matic just wants to her to show him her boobs
     
  3. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    I’m still debating nicking the super cute, sort of, single mother’s number off our sales database and hitting her up for a date. One, baby daddy still in the picture but this seems negotiable on her part. Two, her mom still works at the company and if I’m rebuffed it’d get really weird. Three, I haven’t been laid in a LONG time.


    Change my mind(insert Steven crowder pic):
     
    #3 Kubla Kahn, May 11, 2018
    Last edited: May 11, 2018
  4. greybeard

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    gravity defying shadow boob's have feelings too ya know.
    Or is that "i'd like to feel gravity defying shadow boobs"?
     
  5. Revengeofthenerds

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    So is that a watermark on that picture or a cum stain?
     
  6. greybeard

    greybeard
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    Disturbed

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    At my age, more likely drool
     
  7. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    I’m not doing the second thing, but I think we’ve discussed the downside to pissing in your own pool before.

    You’ve slept with women you worked with. And there was no backlash because of it, right?

    39413D90-E5F1-4C84-BDDF-1736F925A770.gif

    Remember: if things go south, get awkward or even weird... she’s still going to be there tomorrow.
     
  8. toytoy88

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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    Sage advice.

    I went out with a girl I worked with when I was young. It was all well and good right up until we broke up. Then I had to deal with her everyday while acting professional as if I'd never fucked her in the city dump while a stray dog ran all over her car and stared in the window at us.
     
  9. xrayvision

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    Yea but if she asks how you got her number and you tell her you lifted it from a database, it might not work in your favor. Plus, I was kidding in my rep about peeling through the HR files.
     
  10. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    It's not gravity defying, like she's had implants - the picture used for the silhouette imaging was taken in mid spin on the pole. Clearly, that's just centrifugal, sorry centripetal, force at work.
     
  11. Kubla Kahn

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    Yeah I know that’s basically a no go. I’ve resigned myself to moving on but that doesn’t make for interesting message board banter does it?

    I’m 2 for 4 in dating girls from work. Two that I’m still friends with today and two that ended in absolute disaster.
     
  12. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    By those odds you may marry the next one, or on the other hand you someday could be awoken by her while she’s brandishing a large, rusted ice hook and wearing a mask made of her dad’s face.
     
  13. toytoy88

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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    The fucking desert. I hate the fucking desert.
    I originally read Xray's message as "Peeing on the HR files." That might be a novel approach. I suggest trying it. What's the worst that could happen?
     
  14. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    His urine would mix with Tammy's from accounting?

    Fucking Tammy, man.
     
  15. AFHokie

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  16. Kubla Kahn

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    Like this girl?

    [​IMG]

    Id want my money back from this "Luxy" dating app. Obviously their vetting is only for the guys to make sure their millionaire, girls just need a set of BEWBS to apply.
     
  17. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Sixty-five THOUSAND texts after one date? I would get creeped out after six texts. How is that even possible? I mean, how is it possible to be that insane?

    Never, EVER let her out in public again. Some people simply are bad seeds.
     
  18. Kubla Kahn

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    I mean Im pretty sure every major phone has a block caller function. How do you let someone rack up that many without blocking or changing your number?
     
  19. bewildered

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    Sounds like someone was putting together some evidence for the court ordered psyche admission that is surely around the corner.
     
  20. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    Euthanasia seems like a better option. That woman would eat her own young off a spit roast.
     
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