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WDT - 7/24/15

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Juice, Jul 22, 2015.

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  1. CharlesJohnson

    CharlesJohnson
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    My friend is turning 40. I need to find a 500 pound stripper immediately. No, really, where the fuck do I even begin to look for novelty whores?

    Anybody got other ideas how to make this party memorable? You know, ruined. Brainstorm with me. Anybody throw a landmark celebration for someone? Dangerous amounts of alcohol are already covered. Might be able to get some mushrooms. I really want something sleazy like ass to ass with two midgets or an amputee stripper or a tranny with a flipper arm popping out of a cake.

    Help me, TIB, you're my only hope.
     
  2. toytoy88

    toytoy88
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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    The fucking desert. I hate the fucking desert.
    Nuxoll told police he and Cramer had drunk vodka, and when he woke up his friend was dead. But he also allegedly said, "I hope I didn't kill Dave, but if I did, I'm sorry."
     
  3. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Call up your local shittiest strip club, tell them your plight... I'm sure the promoter has a ton of applicants that didn't meet even his low standards.

    Failing that, Craigslist.
     
  4. Currer Bell

    Currer Bell
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    I'm not going to drink this weekend because there is a nerd con in town and I will be spending the whole time geeking out with my daughter. But I will be happy to come in here when I get home and gibber fandom nonsense in my over-excited state - same outcome, really.
     
  5. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Male or female friend? If female, do nothing. Turning 40 is shitty enough as it is. So I've heard.

    If male, get him drunk and take him out to get his scrotum tattooed with a picture of Jesus.
     
  6. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Great start. I may be able to work with this:
     
  7. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Wow, being a mom has really messed up your brain. I'm surprised you can't even remember two years ago.
     
  8. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Now that she's 45 she's getting that "sometimers" that hits the old folks.
     
  9. Currer Bell

    Currer Bell
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    My own experience and that of others who have shared with me is that 40 is the decade where you learn to stop giving a shit. It's fabulous.
     
  10. shegirl

    shegirl
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    Redemption Seeking Whore

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    Pack your bags. We be movin'.
     
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