FunnyOrDie has a sort-of-unfunny bit up about Ralph Macchio going bad-boy to resurrect his career. As the video points out, many people (e.g., Robert Downey, Jr., Hugh Grant...) are wildly successful in spite of doing things that should ostensibly fuck up their lives. FOCUS: Who in your life is successful despite being a fuck-up or flouting all possible social convention? What is the secret to the success?
I have a friend who smokes a ton of weed, drinks every night, has a bullshit degree, and is the most obnoxious guy I know. That being said, he has a gorgeous girlfriend who won't leave his side. And he is all set to retire when he is 25. Yeah. 25. He's 22 now. Must be nice being born into a oil company. Still LOVE the kid though. He has that "I should really hate you, but I can't" type of personality.
Live in a world in which academics are viewed as a substitute for competence and/or real achievement, and in particular, an academic world that isn't willing to fail people simply for being fucking morons. This is how people can be "successful" while still asking questions like "are you liable for malpractice if you're speaking a language besides English?" and being entirely incapable of wearing a tie properly.
That's not really being "successful" in the conventional sense, though; that's winning the lottery with who your parents are. Anywho, I have known quite a few classically nerdy, anti-social types that have become very successful with either start-ups or I-banking. The funniest was the following Asian dude; -In high school, we both did Science Bowl with our respective schools, and he confided in me that he hated all of his teammates, didn't even want to attend the competition with them, and thought they were all a bunch of fucking idiots. His team ended up winning the competition, going to nationals, (getting a free vacation to DC at a government center, essentially) and he was the only person on the team who answered any questions the whole way through. -Once spent a semester in college (we went to the same school) in the lunatic asylum. -Would spend until 3 am every morning cursing clanmates on DOTA for being fucking morons. -Had a collection of giant swords in his room. Once stabbed a guy who pissed him off with one. -After being hired by Goldman Sachs, he was recruiting at our school, and told people; "basically...we're looking for people who aren't COMPLETE fucking morons. If you're only a halfway fucking moron, drop off your application here."
This is just jealousy since the dude was born into a better family than you. So is he truly obnoxious or is he a good guy in general but you just wish you could be as carefree as he is? I really don't see how this guy would fit the focus as you are describing it... A guy I met recently fits the more successful with woman than his personality should typically allow. Im not talking about the asshole that really just knows how women operate and can play to the qualities women like. This dude has none of that. I think the dude might be retarded. He's vulgar and crude. He brings up dick jokes about every other sentence when hitting on women. He just puts out the "Im horny and want to fuck" vibe using those exact words. Maybe it is the class of women he's hitting on but Ive never seen him be charming in anyway yet he still seems to cleans up. Not that he is successful with all women, he plays the numbers big time. I just can't fathom even the horniest of bar skanks falling for his shit...
My roommate. He does hard drugs on a regular basis, goes to the bar 5 nights a week, sleeps through his classes, etc. However, he's taking 18 credits this semester as a biology major, and somehow manages to pull a 3.8.
Well according to Webster's online dictionary, "Successful: resulting or terminating in success." Hmm, doesn't really help.
That's just it, everyone may define it differently. To some it's based strictly on money. Others it's what you said, being at the top of their game whatever that may be. Others, it's having a hoard of kids. Others it's just being able to buy a home. Some, it's having lots of people that love and care about them. And yet to others it's being literally fat&happy. Normally in the trailer park but still. I define it as a little of all of it, except for the kid part. I don't get it and never will but more power to the parents out there that do. Of course I want to be successful in the workplace and make lots of money doing it. Doesn't everyone want to be a homeowner eventually. Well, hmm, maybe not right now....anyway, I have a very large pool of friends. I consider this to be a reflection of who I am and how I treat others as, you tend to surround yourself with those that have similar qualities. I'm not a fatty but I am happy most of the time, mainly because I have what I have and I don't live in a trailer park. I have a GF that was a drunk. She had no job, would be hammered by Noon and make drunk calls all the time. She almost drank herself to death. She got straight, dumped the loser she was with, met a great guy, has now married, had a kid and is a homeowner. She is one of the strongest people I am proud to know.
Fair enough, but not quite what I was going for. Success can be, and should be, painted in broad strokes. Each person will see it differently, for a million different reasons, and will use a million different methods to achieve it. Now, being "in the upper echelon of their profession, sport, hobby or endeavor", is a great measure of success for a good number of people, and certainly covers your previous point of people busting their asses to be successful. What it doesn't cover is those out there who really and truly don't work hard, but by their own measure are successful. Hell, some of my closest friends are slackers, and a few of them are doing just fine, drifting along, happy as a clam, rarely working or taking a major interest in anything. There are also those who are born into money, who don't really have to put any effort into living comfortably and achieving what they want. Point is, not every measure of success is defined by hard work. Just food for thought.