Women who order vodka and diet coke are generally alcoholics who are trying to hide how much they drink from those around them. They also are usually 40 something control freaks that have large amounts of baggage from previous failed relationships, they are usually employed as an account executive or some kind of company rep.
I kid, I kid. My (just recently) ex girlfriend of about 3 years was half Native, half Irish i.e. %100 crazy. Now if I can find a nice black girl to date I'm soooo going to make a grape drink joke.
In my experience, people who buy Grey Goose are unable to provide clear reasons for it and don't like learning about Veblen goods.
I sincerely doubt people ordering pina coladas at a three-deep college bar on a Saturday night are doing so in protest of small business economics. I think they're simply oblivious to the world around them. And for that? Boogers in the eyes.
Vodka (stored in water bottle) and _______ - probably stolen from parents liquor cabinet. See: jailbait
Put it this way: the longer the bartender spends mixing up your complicated shit, the more sober I become. And that shit's irritating. I wholeheartedly agree with this. I won't refuse a Busch Light if it's all that's there (or if I don't want to snipe the good beers), but of course I prefer a Guinness Draught or Blue Moon any day. And it tastes great too. Win-win! Seriously though, if you're that concerned about calories, don't drink.
You seem like the kind of guy who's probably the last person in a group of friends at the bar, saying things like "Don't go yet! One more round....c'moooon. Don't be a pussy" or maybe just a little overzealous about drinking in general. Why are you romanticizing it so much? Can you not have a good time without drinking? Is time spent with friends suddenly more legitimate and significant to you if you guys are drinking? Your examples were pretty much disjointed ramblings about different kinds of drunks, not people in general. I don't think you get what that guy was saying, you just used it as a jumping point for...whatever that was you just wrote. If alcohol is the cornerstone to the relationships you have with people around you, maybe you should reevaluate why that is. Too many of you are being idiots and trying to throw these steadfast rules out there, like it’s some sort of maxim that if a guy orders a certain drink that he’s a douchebag, or he’s trying too hard, or he’s gay, etc. I would venture that most of you guys are just using the drink as an excuse to rant about some retarded notion that you’ve picked up over the years that no one has had the energy to tell you isn’t funny, so you still use it. What’s that? That fag just ordered a faggy Pimm’s Cup? What a faggot. Boozing is just like everything else in life, it is never black and white, just shades of grey. You’ve got to be flexible in your drinking. If I’m at a decent bar with a friend for a few drinks, I’ll take advantage of their inventory and get something nicer if I’m in the mood and don’t mind spending a lot of money. Does drinking a 75 Minute IPA make me a douchebag? Apparently it does. If I’m on a budget, there’s nothing wrong with ordering Coors Banquet or bourbon sodas. Does that make me a cheap piece of shit that doesn’t appreciate the good things in life? Apparently it does. If it’s morning, you’re goddamn right I’ll drink mimosas. Mango mimosas. Peach mimosas. Does that mean after I’m done double fisting them I’ll segue into double fisting two random guys because I’m drunk on tasty effervescent fruit hooch? Apparently it does. I’m not saying that you can’t bag on your friend for ordering a Shirley Temple, because it’s your friend and that’s expected. It’s a feminine drink. But if you see someone ordering it and you automatically assume that he’s going to leave the bar to meet some twink off of Craigslist and blow him in the Target parking lot, I think you might need to take a step back and figure out what that says about YOU. If a guy at the grocer’s checkout has a box of Lucky Charms instead of a box of Fiber One is he an immature malcontent, a pedophile, maybe both? Or maybe he just likes that fucking cereal. I don’t know how many of you started your trek down the winding road of functional alcoholism by drinking single malt scotch and milk stouts, but I’m willing to bet that number is zero. A big reason why people order weird drinks, girly drinks, drinks that are a pain in the ass to make, etc is simply because they don’t know better. I worked in a bar for years, and constantly saw guys who were finally legal to drink belly up to the bar and order vodka sprites, do lemon drop shots, etc because they didn’t know better. On the other hand, some of them would order a local IPA, or do shots of rye whiskey, because they think that it’s manly and they’re somehow less than such if they get a rum and diet or a mixed shot. It was obvious they weren’t enjoying what they ordered, but once again, they didn’t know better. It takes time, and if after years of drinking some guy has found that the only thing that he likes drinking are appletinis, more power to him. At least he’s true to who he is and what he likes. Meanwhile in Nova Scotia there’s some pockmarked loser choking down whatever booze his dad used to drink because he thinks it somehow makes him a man. I don’t have the time to go into further detail as to why a lot of you are posturing idiots when it comes to booze, but maybe after you sit at home on a Friday night and dissect every word in this post and hammer it out furiously in a Four Loko induced haze, you can give me some more material to further prove that point. I think I’ll go out, maybe have a Pimm’s Cup.
I've taken to drinking cider. Half the people who see me do it think I'm a pussy, the other half think I'm fomenting revolution in the colonies.
Mojito: what do you people think? It's my go to let's-see-if-this-bar-is-great drink. In my experience, few places can make a truly awesome one, but the ones that do, really know their shit (and pour heavy) with other drinks. It's a litmus test. Albeit a drink that takes a bit to make if done correctly, so I'll order only if it's slow. Regardless, I don't know the stereotype. Not that it would keep me from enjoying one, but I'm curious.
I have to agree with the mojito being a decent judge of bar quality. It's not terribly complicated, but many places still mess it up. I've had a range in quality from delicious and refreshing, to a wet salad in a cup. It was literally soggy mint leaves.
I don't see how you two are at odds, really. You accuse Solaris of going off on a tangent, but you did the same: comparing a genuine love of the act of drinking, the object thereof, with some sort of diseased mental process, combined with an insecure projection against those that don't measure up to the perceived standard. "DUDE, appletinis!? What a pussy!" If that's all you're getting out of that post, then you're reading it wrong. There is a poetry in drinking - in the way it makes you more friendly, vivacious, outgoing, quicker to lend, sooner to forgive. Sorry for going all Modern Drunkard on your ass, but I do think it's a special thing. The first time I drank scotch, it was like liquid heaven (Dewar's 12, and I don't give a shit what y'all think about that). There is a line, and some of us have crossed it; but there is an art in drinking, just as there's an art in everything. It's stupid to confuse that with some sort of alcoholic sectarianism.
This is the truth. It's also what I hate so much about the "video games are not art" stance. Every industry has its premium components, as well as its remarkably poor ones. With movies, beer, video games, music, food, sports, etc. some of them are an art form all their own, and some of them just plain fucking suck. They all lie on the same continuum.
A good mojito is a must, it's a drink I want at the bar. There isan Irish Pub up the street that makes killer mojitos.
This made my college days a little better - Homemade hard cider: 1.) Get a gallon of apple cider (the cheap shit sugary store brand works better than the good stuff) 2.) Separate the cider into 20 oz plastic bottles with a little extra room at the top 3.) Throw some cooking yeast in each of the bottles 4.) Put them somewhere dark, preferably a closet, for a month 5.) Open cider, be careful, this stuff is going to be hella carbonated, and enjoy 6.) Share cider with young girls, enamor them with your awesome skills 7.) Insert penis in vagina(s)