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To new heights of assholery!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Aetius, Jun 18, 2012.

  1. Aetius

    Aetius
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    I don't now if any of you have been following the drama between The Oatmeal and Funnyjunk, but things just took a turn from amusing internet drama to stupifying levels of asstarded douchebaggery:

    Funnyjunk's lawyer has sued The Oatmeal, Indiegogo and most importantly: The American Cancer Society

    You heard that right, the man who is somehow convinced that his client is being wronged by the man whose work they illegally profit off of, wants to take money from cancer patients.

    Focus: Discuss the case

    Alternative Focus: Lawyers are assholes, amirite?
     
  2. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    So, The Oatmeal gets sued by the person that's ripping them off, and yet College Humour is supposedly the most popular "original" humour website and they shamelessly rip other humour sites? Their most popular article is a re-post from lamebook.com that one of their "writers" takes credit for. Don't be surprised if a few posts on THIS site have been "re-born" on College Humour. Shouldn't they be writing their show that will be cancelled after one episode?

    As far as this goes, I don't know what the hell funnyjunk is, but I know what The Oatmeal is: probably the funniest internet comic in the world, jam-packed with dry truths and observational humour. This case is a joke. For one, Funnyjunk is originally trying to BLACKMAIL the Oatmeal out of $20,000 for posting things that are undisputable facts. Two, the ridiculous levels this lawyer is sinking to, he'd have to dig a fucking hole to lower the bar more.

    Like I said, I have never heard of Funnyjunk before, but whoever the fuck they are, they're fake lowlife pieces of shit and I want them destroyed. Are we capabable of such a task?
     
  3. KIMaster

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  4. kuhjäger

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    The lawyer posted this on his website:

    (Dedicated to Matthew Inman of the Oatmeal)

    Well he used to be a pterodactyl up in the sky,
    Tearin' people's heads off,
    and eatin' their eyes,
    But now he's done a change-up,
    Got a new disguise --
    All Points Bulletin: Look out for this guy!

    He's a psycho-Santa with a big bag of tricks,
    Ringin' a bell, and beggin' for clicks,
    Psycho Santa got a itty bitty stick,
    Psycho Santa, don't fall for his schtick.
    Particularly dangerous to boys and girls
    Who play with computers in the virtual world
    He claims to be the hero of the human race,
    A relief from their cubicles and bookin' their face.

    He's a psycho-Santa with a big bag of tricks,
    Ringin' a bell, and beggin' for clicks,
    Psycho Santa got a itty bitty stick,
    Psycho Santa, don't fall for his schtick.

    His prehistoric origin's a mystery --
    Did he escape from the lavatory?
    Was he made by the Pentagon and NSA
    A living drone that shoots mind rays,
    Makin' zombies of his followers --
    Internet slaves!

    He's a psycho-Santa with a big bag of tricks,
    Ringin' a bell, and beggin' for clicks,
    Psycho Santa got a itty bitty stick,
    Psycho Santa, don't fall for his schtick.

    When cornered he will strike back with a vicious blow,
    There is no depth to which he will not go.
    Do not attempt to apprehend --
    Type "King Kong," then hit Send.

    He's a psycho-Santa with a big bag of tricks,
    Ringin' a bell, and beggin' for clicks,
    Psycho Santa got a itty bitty stick,
    Psycho Santa, don't fall for his schtick.

    He can revert to his original form at will.
    X-Men got nothin' he can't kill.
    Only a simian of similar size
    Can pluck the Pterodactyl out of the skies.

    He's a psycho-Santa with a big bag of tricks,
    Ringin' a bell, and beggin' for clicks,
    Psycho Santa got a itty bitty stick,
    Psycho Santa, don't fall for his schtick.

    [​IMG]

    Ok, lawyers on here, this has to be crossing some sort of line.

    Oh, and here are some more crazy things from he and his wife's messageboard:
    9-11 truther bullshit

    Indy Media is a tool of the illuminati

    His nutso nihilistic psuedo bhuddist ramblings
     
  5. Misanthropic

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    This may have been said in jest, and some of my best friends are lawyers (not really), but the most psychotic, crooked, offensive client I have ever had in 22 years of business is a lawyer. Anecdotal evidence, but there it is.
     
  6. Aetius

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    a) This lawyer is suing pro se, so this one ain't about the client

    b) Doctors cure cancer, that's a slight difference.
     
  7. RCGT

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    Both Funnyjunk and The Oatmeal go in the category of "Unfunny Internet Bullshit" along with 9GAG and 90% of Reddit. Say what you will about CollegeHumor, at least they can make people laugh without resorting to:
    1. Notice minor societal problem
    2. Draw comic exaggerating problem to OVER9000LOLOLOL
    3. Get a million shares on Facebook with people commenting "OMG SO TRUE!!"

    I feel like Allord should be in this thread, this is the kind of shit he specializes in.
     
  8. kuhjäger

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    Except, only one of those sites only hosts content they created themselves, and not the same shit uploaded by any fuckstick with an email address.
     
  9. RCGT

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    Not saying any different, just saying I find them all equally annoying. Maybe that's offtopic, but I don't know what there is to discuss. The dude's obviously got a case. And the stupidity of going out of your way to piss people off when you're clearly in the wrong, with even the slightest possibility of legal action - I don't even.
     
  10. scootah

    scootah
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    I once walked into a law firm as a professional service provider, the firm had used the the company I was working for a few times before. I showed up nicely dressed, with a small earring. The senior partner of the firm met me for the introduction, shook my hand, looked me up and down and said 'So are you a faggot or what?'

    There was no irony or jest to the question. He genuinely wanted to know if the ear ring I was wearing meant that I enjoyed the taste of cock, because he didn't want his computers fixed by a faggot. I suspect it was also a dare to take offense and try and make him answer to the anti discrimination laws that he was flouting, since he knew that the cost of contesting the case would be prohibitive and since he owned the biggest law firm in the area and was golf buddies with most of the judges in the region, it wouldn't ever have gone anywhere. But mostly it was just that he didn't want faggots in his office. At the time, I wasn't in a position to pass on the work, let alone try and deal with the discriminatory nature of the question. But that was the moment when I decided to dramatically change my shit so I wouldn't have to work for that kind of asshole again. I don't even look at law firm jobs any more.
     
  11. scootah

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    And then a sharp zigzag through traffic into 'holy fuck, these people are INSANE'.

    Wow. Carreon's wife is spectacularly insane.

    seriously, check it out, 6 pages of this kind of diatribe

    Carreon himself is poet, and he's written some poems about the whole kerfuffle

    American-Buddha is an interesting domain name for the guy suing the American Cancer Society

    Wow. Just fucking wow.
     
  12. Crown Royal

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    Where did this fucking ding-dong get his law degree from in the first place? Regent?

    And to think my whole life I didn't believe in soul mates. Cosmic forces brought these two brazen cunts together. Nothing that a ruptured stove gas line and a few cans of Raid in their microwave while they sle

    An attack on Funnyjunk is an attack on law and order? It's like listening to Roger Clemens bitch about cheating in sports.