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Things women want and the things men think women want.

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Oct 29, 2009.

  1. shegirl

    shegirl
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    Redemption Seeking Whore

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    4. Fun, playful, creative, passionate.

    Women want a man who enjoys what life has to offer. They want a man who knows how to play, who is not afraid to make a fool of himself, who lives his passions. They want a man of creative, intellectual, playful substance.

    What men think women want:

    Men often think women want complete and total devotion of the man's time and focus. Men sometimes believe, if unconsciously, women want to have a relationship for the sake of security. Hence, men often believe they have to give up their playful, passionate, creative nature when entering a relationship.

    Tip for men:

    Modern women want a mate, and that means at least partly a playmate. If you want to attract a powerful, vibrant, great woman and build an outstanding relationship, relearn to play. Discover your passion to make yourself irresistibly attractive.

    Linkage to the rest.


    I've always found our differences in thinking/needs/wants and so on, to be not only interesting and frustrating but also somewhat obvious. Not helping is that we communicate it completely different ways. Men bang on a rock down by the river and women, well we just bang pots together in the kitchen because we aren't allowed to leave that room, much less speak.

    FOCUS: Discuss.
     
  2. effinshenanigans

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    This is so true.

    I frequently find myself thinking, "I feel thirsty, I need a beer. I want her to get me the beer, and I hope that she does. But if I push the issue too much, tonight I'll be dreaming about having sex instead of actually having sex. Which will be a problem."

    My favorite points of the article are 7-10. There, I feel she really isolated the greatest want men have regarding women: silence.


    Joking aside, though, women want to be simultaneously loved and left to their own devices. They want to be able to eat a burger without feeling fat. They want to laugh. They want to have a best friend. The rest of it, all of the generalizations that people come up with, is bullshit to me. Figure out the idiosyncrasies of the person you're with and pay attention. That's all you should ever need.
     
  3. M4A1

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    "1.Clear, open, responsible communicator & listener


    Women want men to communicate. Women specifically want communication about feelings, needs, wants, hopes, dreams, problems, solutions and all other things which make a relationship work. Women also want communication about expectations and plans. Women would rather put things on the table than sweep them under the rug. Women want men to communicate, listen and respond.
    What men think women want
    ------------------------------------------
    Men think women want them to be women. They think women want men to talk, and men need to talk as much as women do. They also believe women either want to make them wrong when they talk, or want to have a problem fixed.

    Tip for men
    ----------------
    To participate in communication is the greatest gift a man can give a woman and himself. No solid relationship can be built without truly listening, reflecting and thoughtfully responding. If a solid, passionate, wonderful relationship with a great woman is what you want, learn or polish your skills of listening and communicating."


    I think that the majority of the rest of the list can be some variation of this. Its not that men and women can't communicate, I think that too often, instead of listening, people are thinking of what to say next, instead of really understanding what the other person said. Throw that in with men and women process information differently.

    In my dating life, I've learned that with women, alot of what they're trying to communicate is what they're not saying. Learning to read between the lines can be a bitch sometimes, but all too necessary. I've also found 1 little question can save alot of issues,"Are you venting, or do you want my opinion/to fix this" Sometimes, people just need to vent.


    Where is the tips for women on how to communicate with men?
     
  4. shegirl

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    HAHA! Oh you are being serious? I thought as long as they had food, beer, sports and pussy they'd be content. And silence.
    If you find this, and if you figure out a way to do more listening to one another than offering advice and/or opinions you were not asked for, a lot of the other stuff just seems to fall into place.

    Both genders have some crazy. Don't deny it.
     
  5. Supertramp

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    I dislike lists like this because they're completely off from the get-go. Women and Men are almost exactly alike; we're all humans.

    To engage in discussions, write lists and books, burn effigy's and rally against a gender is so ass-backwards that it makes me wonder how people could be so blind. Who think's that it's just women who want a partner that communicates?

    It's all one-and-the-same: if you don't like something stupid that "women do", chances are your girlfriend doesn't either. Though there are some real differences between the genders, it mostly gets derived to: treat her like you'd like to be treated. The more one tries to "treat her like I think she wants to be treated because she's a women (or because a list tells me)" the more you end up treating her like another species and not as another person.
     
  6. effinshenanigans

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    Oh, absolutely. The trick is to find someone with the flavor of crazy that meshes well with yours.
     
  7. Beefy Phil

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    Exactly. They don't deal with real problems. Like what to do when your throat closes, you flop sweat and, in a moment of confusion and paralyzing fear brought on by years of compounded emotional stagnancy and antisocial behavior, you blurt out, "So, how much would someone have to pay you to have sex with that girl right there?"

    Real problems.
     
  8. the antihero

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    I have an amazing relationship with my girl because we have one rule that defines our relationship: I'll be the man and she'll be the woman.

    I make her feel like a woman by making her feel sexy, appreciating her, and when her feminine insecurities play on her I'm the one that pulls her in close and tells her that everything will be OK and that I will make it ok for her. She in return follows my leadership, satisfies me on every level, and is super girly.

    I know what she wants and that is she wants someone like me who can handle the world and isn't afraid of it. She knows that I'll handle all that stuff so she can just be a good woman to me and do things like cook for me and do my laundry.

    I understand that this post my piss some girls off but I think what it comes down to is all women want a men that will appreciate them for their feminine nature and a man that will make them feel like a woman.
     
  9. Rob4Broncos

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    What women want: cock.

    What men think women want: cock.

    Where does the confusion come in?
     
  10. effinshenanigans

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    I love the contrast between that statement and your avatar (though, presumably, they may be warming up for an out-of-frame cock).
     
  11. shegirl

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    Although what you said has some truths to it, it does not apply to all women. We are all different. Some aren't quite this squishy. I don't want to be held, have my hair stroked and be told to just be the wonderful woman I am and He (basically I could replace that word with Daddy) will make it all ok. I don't want to just stand still and look pretty. I want engagement, intelligent conversation that challenges my brain, I want to learn for myself so I will always retain the lesson. You cannot do so without tripping up sometimes.

    Yes, I want to feel like a women, but I don't get all of my femininity from being told, I get from me first. You guys are great and we cannot live without you but that's two fold.

    As for the bolded part, if that's what works for you fine but when did we step back into the 1960s? Her only job is to be a good woman, cook and wash your clothes? And in return you shelter her, so that she won't have the tools to deal with the hard things that come up if or when you're not around? Seriously? Additionally she "follows your leadership"? What does that mean exactly?

    You boys are just as complicated as we are when it comes to this stuff, some want us to nurture, which is ingrained into us because we are women and others, want a what is demonstrated above. You knew one of us would say something.
     
  12. Rob4Broncos

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    "There's not a woman in this room that wouldn't rather be somewhere else with a nice stiff one in them." - Eddie Murphy, Raw

    Sapphic love is great, but the girls know it doesn't measure up.
     
  13. Allord

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    What? Oh there was more to your post? I got totally distracted. Yeah, I was listening...hmm...pussy...
    I've got an animated one like that where when they pull away from each other a double-ender emerges forth from both of their lips. If I could buy two lesbians as a carrying case for a double-ender I may just be motivated to actually buy a double-ender.
    I think you're missing the point of what you've done. It's not about masculinity or femininity or presuming a woman wants to be perceived and appreciated for a particular trait, it's about the fact that at some point you listened to each other and understood what each of you desired out of a relationship and then made it happen. That or you were just lucky in the fact that the particular brand of relationship you are willing to provide is the same type of relationship she desires. If so that was a hell of a shot, cowboy.
    Focus:
    What humans want: A fellow human with complementary genitalia and a lack of social retardation.
    What social retards think humans want: A checklist of predefined behaviors and actions that can be listed and marked off like features on a car.
    See what I did there?
     
  14. hooker

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    What a crock of shit.

    "Feed me. Fuck me. Fuck off." If everyone could agree to that, the world would be a better place.
     
  15. Rob4Broncos

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    Why are you talking? Go get me a sandwich.
     
  16. JProctor

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    I agree that sex shouldn't be an emotional hornet's nest and people attach too much to it. Sadly, there are some people out there who don't. In fact, there are some who would go far as to say:

    I am a terribly sexual person, with VERY few hard limits - but I still struggle with the idea of being open with someone you love.

    Either you're confused about how you feel, or you post whatever you feel will garner you the most attention in any given thread. Why do you do this?
     
  17. Blue Dog

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    I disagree with this one. I'm pretty self aware of the fact that my feet smell like a combination of horse farts and week old ketchup, and this fact has yet to impress a lady. What a bunch of bullcrap.

    As far as being introspective, sometimes I sit at home and vacillate over my mastication options, but I try not to introspect. It just sounds gay.
     
  18. hooker

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    Open relationship means fucking your husband and multiple other men. I see this as a problem.

    Having the "feed me, fuck me, fuck off" mentality is making things really simple in a marriage. I don't see this as a problem.

    Does that clarify things for you?
     
  19. JProctor

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    You think someone who loves you so much that they cannot bear to share you wants you to fuck off after he's done? Usually I reserve the latter sentiment for people for whom I don't have much use beyond sex.

    Maybe I'm just a softie.
     
  20. travdiddy84

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    Where's TheBunny when you 'need' her?