It's not just the fact they get their entire calcium intake from Rolaids. It's the fact they flat-iron their hair so they resemble their hero known as the King Of The Fagtrons and wear below-the-asscheeks jeans so tight it makes their dicks vapourize. Let us not forget the 16' long scarf they wear....in the summer...with a pink t-shirt that's so bright they can see it from the International Space Station. If that's not manly, than just dip me in mustard and call me Hot Dog. No, that's not the Old Man in me talking. It's eyesight. And I have perfect vision. My best friend next door had a dad with porn tapes...On BETA. Seriously though, Beta was the better than VHS. The tapes were smaller, rewound quicker and had better picture quality. So, VHS bought them out and exterminated them. Nice, huh?
Yeah I thought of this too when this thread came up. The Problem Child Kid and Atreyu look about what I'd imagine they'd look like. One real kicker for me was a month or two ago I went to the doctor and the women doctor looked younger than me, quite cute too. That made me feel old. Also, the kid down the street from me that graduated valedictorian* in my grade just became a doctor. Which made me feel old and worthless sense I haven't done shit in my life to compare to that... *(is the d in that pronouced like a V or have I just heard/said it wrong my entire life?)
Getting called 'Sir' Its happened to me twice recently, both times it was a young lady (late teens, early twenties tops). Both times the girls were very pretty and i was already imagining the naughty things id like to do to a fine young piece of ass like that when they busted out the 'Excuse me Sir?'... well fuck. I dont think i look old, and i certainly dont feel old. Shit, when my facial hair is freshly shaved i still occasionally get carded (im 28), but fuck me if getting called Sir by a chick you would have hit on with ease several years ago isnt the quickest way to make a fella feel old. Really old.
Ha! You think that makes you feel old now? Wait til you're forty and you realize those chicks weren't even born when you graduated high school. All except maybe a couple of you can stay off my lawn. Where's my Metamucil?
Kids nowadays have no idea what it's like to spend a week hunched over in a small, icy cave, painting the walls partly out of boredom, partly out of a sick sense of satisfaction at the thought of someone else trying in vain to work out the cryptographic significance of a bison humping a boulder shaped like a tortoise. Then being drawn outside into the snowdrift by the excited grunts and shouts of your fellows. Grabbing a crudely fashioned blade-tied-to-a-pole on your way out. The rush of running quickly through the blanketed landscape, navigating through trees and cresting hills. The apprehensive excitement of approaching your destination, never quite knowing how much further, always expecting it to be just around the corner. And then you arrive. The huge, woolly beast imposing its form upon the landscape like the many mountains dotting the horizon. The intense adrenaline rush as the sight invigorates your entire group to surge forward on the offensive, pointy sticks drawn and ready, eyes wild with hunger and lust for blood and feasting. The descent into chaos, the sudden flash of combat, the utter destruction of something much bigger and more powerful than yourself, the conquest of that which seemed insurmountable. The feast of carnage followed by the feast of flesh. The beginning of jubilant feasting. That's when I felt old, when the kids today want their iPods, and indoor plumbing, and central heating, and agriculture. Modernist crap, it's all just a fad.
Every time I watch basketball and they talk about how old Kevin Garnett, or Paul Pierce, or Ray Allen are... For they are all younger than me.
Next semester I will be a 29 year old college sophomore. Being more than a decade older than almost everyone you take classes with is kind of depressing. This really hits home when the place you suggest to meet up to study is shot down because, "that place cards really hard."
It's cute how everyone is mentioning social trends with kids. Clothes don't make sense, the music is loud and crappy. Kids be texting and driving! Cellphones! I now have fucking EAR HAIR. Are you turning into Morlocks? No? Your arguments are invalid. GOOD DAY, SIRS.
I am in grad school now and I am 27 yrs old. When I go to class and I see all these undergrads that look like they are in high school. I realized that I probably looked that young and I thought I was "old" then. SAD!
For my people: the Jays are playing the Braves tonight in Atlanta. 20 years ago. That's when they won their first World Series. I remember it still play-by-play. Memories. Ancient, ancient fucking memories.
Most of the time, I still feel like I'm 16 on the inside, as long as I ignore my nose hair and ear hair. The things that make me old are when I hear Lindsay Lohan is 25, or Miley Cyrus is 19, I think, Jesus, I've been hearing about these chicks for like a decade. And I was fucking old THEN.
Dakota Fanning and Dakota Blue Richards are both legal now. Dwelling on that makes even me feel creepy, and that's saying something. And yes, it also makes me feel fucking antediluvian. Also consider, as I pointed out in the other thread, the following albums are 20 years old this year. For perspective, 20 years before that Black Sabbath's Vol 4, Elf's first album (country-rock with Dio), and Led Zeppelin IV came out. Alice in Chains--Dirt Megadeth--Countdown to Extinction Pantera--Vulgar Display of Power Black Sabbath--Dehumanizer Body Count--S/T Dream Theater--Images and Words Fear Factory--Soul of a New Machine Iron Maiden--Fear of the Dark Ministry--Psalm 69 Kiss--Revenge Stone Temple Pilots--Core WASP--The Crimson Idol Cannibal Corpse--Tomb of the Mutilated (Best. Lyrics. Ever.) Amoprhis--The Karelian Isthmus Candlemass--Chapter VI Extreme--III Sides to Every Story Flotsam and Jetsam--Cuatro Kyuss--Blues for the Red Sun Manor--The Triumph of Steel Mercyful Fate--Return of the Vampire My Dying Bride--Turn Loose the Swans Obituary--The End Complete Paradise Lost--Shades of God Psychotic Waltz--Into the Everflow Spinal Tap--Break Like the Wind Testament--The Ritual Wildside--Under the Influence
I second this. You want to feel old? Spend 10 minutes manscaping your ears. That shit makes you feel old.
I've not only never listened to any of those albums, I've never even heard of them. How you like them apples?
Pipe down child, grownups are talking. You should be beaten with a switch for not at least recognizing the first four. That reminds me, Nirvana's "Nevermind" was also 20 years old this year.
While back up here in Idaho in my hometown I had someone ask me directions to a certain buisness. I directed them "Go past The Co-Op, keep going after Loman's, cross the railroad tracks and it's right there." I was met with a blank stare and then a "What? I've lived here 15 years and I have no idea what you're talking about." I did some quick math in my head and realized that none of the landmarks I'd mentioned have existed for at least 25 years. So I did the only thing a longtime resident of this area would do, I smugly told the dude "Then how about you go the fuck back to California?"
Ive been talking to a girl here and yesterday she added me to Facebook. She was born in 1992. I feel vaguely nauseated. Not enough to stop hitting on her, but enough to feel bad about it.
Never even heard of Alice in Chains or Pantera? When enough time passes for this kind of claim to be believable, is when I'll feel really old. That was last year. Buy your copy of it a beer. Nah, don't feel bad. Remember the website with the countdown to the Olsen Twins' 18th birthday? They'll be 26 on Wednesday. I wouldn't even be violating that asinine half-plus-seven bullshit with them.