The best way to describe it is a tightening. All the muscles in the area tense up, and you feel it getting warmer. I wouldn't describe it as a good feeling, but it's associated with good things. No. You feel a bunch of pressure building up, but it's not like you feel fluid down there. It's actually a lot like having to piss, really badly (You don't feel the fluid building up in your bladder, either). When I was first going through puberty, I actually thought I was pissing myself. It also comes on very suddenly. It goes from "Hey, I'm erect and this is a nice feeling, doing okay, doing okay... OH SHIT I'm gonna cum."
Spoilered so the only people reading about my dick will be doing so by choice. Spoiler 1. Somewhat. As soon as its erect it becomes much more sensitive, so even being clothed and hard is somewhat more pleasurable than being flaccid. That said, being erect also makes us really really want to use it, so even though it should go without saying, don't take that as "Oh, I got him hard. He's all good now." 2. Kind of. Obviously, the longer you go without getting off, the better it feels when you do, but for me that also translates to sensitivity and not just pleasure. If I've gone a while without getting off, I can feel, if you will, the eruption making its way up the shaft, rather than just "building, building, and....Done" There's a tightening sensation in the balls, but I don't really feel the fluid coming from down there. Again, this is only when it's been a while. Usually, it's just the tightening and a sense almost like needing to piss. It's pretty sudden, too, so it's not something that we have a lot of time to record our thoughts on. FOCUS: What is it with women and games? Specifically, going out of your way to act interested when you're not. How are we supposed to know the difference between flirting to pass the time, and flirting because you're interested? Or does that change by the minute?
Maybe I am alone here, but I am always friendly and do not consciously flirt. Young (read: desperate) guys a lot of times will read that as flirty.
So I'm sharing this thread with a female friend/regular lurker of the site, and we've come up with a joint question. For guys: why do almost all of you REALLY like lesbians? Why is girls kissing etc. number one on nearly every guy's fantasy list? For girls: why don't you feel the same way about gay guys? Most girls I've had the convo with will admit they occasionally fantasize about being with two guys at once (feel free to comment on whether this is true as well, ladies), but the fantasy never involves the two guys kissing etc. For me, the absolute opposite is the case -- the majority of my fantasies are of girls doing things to each other, or me and a girl pleasuring another girl. Having them pleasure me simultaneously only takes up about a quarter of personal fun time. For the guy question, the best answer I can come up with is that it's doubling up on beauty, which I guess is an extension of the 'two are better than one' train of thought, even though me 'having/fucking' two isn't what I'm primarily attracted to. EDIT: 1. I think boners alone feel quite pleasant. I usually get one or two sitting at my desk at work throughout the day, and it's great to sort of move my leg to the right (usually) to tighten the pants for more pressure. Louis CK has a great bit about how when boys are younger they want to press their boners against everything, "even the side of a car that's been warming in the sun all day." 2. It's basically like taking the greatest piss ever, only not a stream, more like a pump. A really awesome pump. I still think of this one orgasm I had a couple years ago though, during REALLY hot sex, where it all came out in one giant shot. Good fucking god. It took me over so much, I even let out a bit of a man scream.
1. Sometimes. If I'm with a girl and she's actively trying to get me hard, then yes. I can feel it and it's awesome. If I'm by myself and get a random boner while having a cigarette or something, then it's like a cruel magic trick. Spoilered for graphic detail: Spoiler 2. I feel it deep behind my nutsack as a pleasurable build up. Once the orgasm starts, I really don't feel anything until it finishes. As soon as I feel myself coming down (ha!) it almost feels like I just took a whiz. Edit: The lesbian thing. You know how a hot girl with a pair of amazing titties is great? Well, two pairs of amazing titties that are mashed up on each other while the owners of said titties make out is even better.
I enjoy MMF threesomes not for any gay action, but because I am the center of attention when it happens. More mouths, hands and dicks, and they're all there to please me! I think men enjoy the FFM threesome specifically because they like to watch? Men are so much more visual than women that this would logically be a huge turn on spectator sport, that you can sit back and see from a perspective you obviously don't get during 1 on 1.
I read a joke e-mail once that compared what men mean when they say something, and what women mean when they say something. It went something like this: Men: "I'm hungry" = I'm hungry. "I'm thirsty" = I'm thirsty. "I'm horny" = I'm horny. Women: "Do these pants make my ass look fat?" = We haven't had a fight in a while. "Do you think that girl has nicer boobs than me?" = You haven't paid me enough compliments lately. "I'll only have a salad." = I know that new girl at your job is younger and skinnier than me, so look, I'm going to try my best! Here's the thing you need to understand: For the most part, men are logical and direct. For the most part, women are emotional and indirect. Because of the way their brains are wired, men will always do exactly what they are asked. "Can you mow the lawn?" You go do it. They get upset because "mow the lawn" was really code for "Mow the lawn, trim the hedges, sweep the walk, hose down the driveway." Women will always do what they assume you meant. If I had $100 for every time I've asked my wife to do something very simple and find that she's gone about 50 steps too far (and most times in the wrong direction from what I was doing) and the explanation starts with, "Well, I just figured..." I would be beyond rich. And I always think, "I don't want you to figure. If I wanted you to do all the shit you just did, that's what I would have asked for." It's just the way they're wired. I posted this bit of advice from my Dad (who serial fornicated his way through the 50s and 60s with great success, apparently, and knows his shit) before on the old board, but it bears repeating: "Someday you will be sitting with a woman. You'll both be looking up at the exact same patch of sky, and she'll say, "Wow, what a beautiful shade of green!" You'll look up and see that it's a beautiful blue sky. You'll check your watch, and it will be 3 p.m. You will know there is no way in hell the sky is green. Now, look at her, and right before you go to correct her, shut up. Don't argue, don't disagree. Just understand that when you look up and see blue, she sees green. It's not about who is right or who is wrong, it's about understanding that she doesn't see it the way you do, and that's the way it is." The best thing you can do with a woman in a situation like IWantSomeJuice has, where she's concerned you're upset is to lean over, give her a big kiss and say, "I completely adore you, you're wonderful, I just want to sit with you and relax. I can relax around you like I've never been able to with anyone else." If that doesn't shut her right up, nothing will.
Honestly, I use the same motivation I teach my kids: "If you do everything you need to do, then you can have time to do everything you want to do." It's easier to get the chores out of the way and have the rest of the day for fun. I have explained to the kids that the stuff that needs to get done is going to get done, whether it takes one hour or five hours. I make it clear that the extra time is coming out of "fun time", and the chores get done quickly. Make him a list and say, "Get all this done this morning, and we'll do anything you want for the rest of the day." Doesn't even have to be sexual. If he wants to go to the motorcycle dealership and drool over the bikes, or sit around in his boxers watching NASCAR or whatever, he can. If he wants you to dress up like Jasmine from Aladdin and try all sorts of new positions, you gotta do it. Negotiate that shit beforehand. Just remember, if he upholds his end of the deal, you have to uphold your end, too.
For those women who managed to last long enough; Did you receive lots of flack for being single as you approached 30? For guys it's not as rough because it is assumed we're advancing in our career before taking on that responsibility...or something like that. Am I wrong in assuming that there is lots of pressure to do the marriage/kids thing because the biological clock is ticking combined with possible spinster status creating a false sense of urgency?
[quote="Superfantastic"For guys: why do almost all of you REALLY like lesbians? Why is girls kissing etc. number one on nearly every guy's fantasy list?[/quote] I don't get the lesbians thing. Lesbians, clearly, won't be fucking me any time soon. Bisexual girls on the other hand? Personal favourite. I think it calls back to the whole herd mentality thing. Almost every guy has some legacy has some legacy hardwiring aimed at being the dominant buck with a herd of females. And as a guy, if you can sexually satisfy two or three women in a single session? You've just secured your bar bragging rights forever. As a bisexual guy, who says they don't? The number of girls I know who wet their pants at the thought of watching two guys together is huge. And the number of women who annoy the fuck out of gay men, trying to pick up at gay bars? Unbelievable.
In the same vein, are there any girls who don't like being held down, at least occasionally, or can I assume this is the case for the majority? This is especially pertinent on one night stands and the like. I'm not talking holding you down with Neanderthal strength, but rather lightly holding your arms/legs/hair to establish a control and power dynamic. In my experience, it has been a big hit, but I can also see how it could make the girl quite uncomfortable as well.
Coming from a 30 year old male, I noticed right around my early 20's how the clout in the war of the sexes shifts. Growing up, women had all the power. The attractive ones had lines of boys ready to ask them out and would often relish and take advantage of us boys looking to get our dick wet. It was a shitty game of cat and mouse. Right around the end of college, women's biological clock goes off. All of a sudden, women are pursuing men. Women are looking to get married and guys know this. But, of course, guys just want to get their pencil wet, so the games continue. So if you think that girl in high school was completely out of your league, give it a few years. More than likely, she'll have a few kids with a husband who works at a car wash and whatever you're doing it's probably more interesting than her life.
A lot of these things are going to vary from woman to woman, especially specific sexual habits. I'd say that for a 1 night stand, it has the potential to be more scary just because it is with someone you've never met before.
Random boners pop up sometimes and no they're not enjoyable. Especially when you're doing something male dominated (like sports) or looking at excel spreadsheets at wok. There is quite a bit of confusion. Also, the essential feeling really isn't anything until they're touched by women. The lesbian thing: 90% of my porn collection is lesbian. Women are fantastic, they're great, and I'm pretty sure my skills have improved exponentially from just watching Viv Thomas movies. Also men are wired to want more than one woman, while women want just the one best man. Every woman who wants two guys, it always comes down to "more attention for me." Spoilered for topic deviation Spoiler When it comes to male female sex, I'm never really imagining myself as the guy which is the reason most guys say they are into it. I enjoy the woman having a great time and losing her shit. 90% of male porn is fucked up by the guy talking and saying all sorts of corny shit which is annoying. Not to mention the whole penis and occasional male asshole shots in my face.... Also, I think about the porn thing and I wonder. If it is "straight" to watch male female porn, straight to watch lesbian porn, gay to watch male on male porn, gay to watch tranny on male then what is tranny on female porn? What I don't get is why so many women lie and say "You don't want a relationship? That's perfectly fine! We can just hook-up and not date, with no commitment and I'm perfectly okay with that." Then a month or two later "You didn't respond to my text for 2 hours! It is impossible for your battery to die! What the fuck? Do I mean nothing to you?" I thought we had a deal, I thought we talked about this...
Girls: Are there things on a guy that you check out in similar manner to how men stare at breasts/ass/any part of a girl? Guys: Do you all still have fantasies? I've found that with the abundance of porn I rarely if ever use my imagination anymore in a sexual manner.
For me it's being kissed on the cheek. If we're together and a woman does this, I'm hers forever. I personally think strict lesbians are dumb. The reason I'd want to enjoy two women is because I enjoy the thought of having a woman sit on my face while I fuck another one. I just relish the thought of being able to please two women at the same time essentially or have both of them please me. I equate this to the great looking dessert on TV or in the cooking magazines, you've never had it before but you just KNOW it's absolutely delicious and want to try it at least once. Maybe it's because I'm still an artist at heart, but I still have them every single day.
I don't really get the lesbian thing either. I mean I understand boobs rule and the only thing hotter than boobs is two sets of boobs, but the way people get when two girls are at a party and start making out? I don't get what is so hot about that. But lesbian porn is still awesome because it's two chicks at the same time (fuckin a), but I still prefer watching straightforward guy/girl porn. The highlight for me is watching the girl get fucked and strap-ons weird me out.