Anything Christmas. Except the drunkenness... that's got it's own thread. Traditions, loot, messages, etc. Go nuts.
This Christmas will be interesting to say the least. My parents are touching down into Saskatoon this afternoon at 3 P.M. and then we will proceed to the girlfriend's family home to have a joint family Christmas. I know. It's getting serious. Strange part is, is that I'm not the least bit nervous, worried or un-enthuised. The parents have met twice before, and have gotten on just fine in each other's company. There'll be a 20-dollar gift exchange tonight, followed by copious amounts of wine and food. Tomorrow morning we'll open presents, eat brunch, drink more! Boxing-Day I'm covering the World Juniors. I'm at work for another hour! And no, I'm not going to "put a ring on it." Yet. EDIT: Happy Holidays to you all. Thanks for providing me with great stories, conversation starters and literary fulfillment. Cheers.
Merry Christmas, everybody. You guys are a pretty fine group of people to hang around with day-to-day. Dysfunctional as hell, but pretty fine just the same.
I never thought I would do it, but my 14 year old nephew is getting a bag of coal from me for his latest suspension from school. After promising me the last time that he was done being a little shit in his classes, he proceeds to sucker punch a kid over some bullshit. Now a fair fight where he was provoked and had to defend himself I understand, but when you sucker punch a kid over something so petty, I draw the fucking line. Merry Christmas Punk.
It's almost time to start my Christmas Eve ritual. First head over to a friends place for a few beers before heading to our local pub. At sometime around eleven I'll begin the long walk/stagger home. Once home crack open a beer and put on the now almost worn out Die Hard DVD, (best Christmas movie ever) before falling asleep. I've done this every year for as long as I can remember. Merry Christmas.
Right now I am pissed at the people in my apartment complex. We have a bank of mailboxes with only 10 places for packages in them, you know the kind of box where the mailman leaves the package box key in your mailbox, you unlock it, get your package, key stays in the lock for the mailman to refill. Well the morons in my apartment complex seem to check their mail once a week, and there aren't any boxes left open for the packages that I have ordered. They are just sitting in the back of a mail truck or something. Then because of this we had the expensive camera lens that we were going to surprise Jägerette's dad with sent to their address a few miles away. And of course he decides to open the box not addressed to him. Shit.
Merry Christmas to you all, you fuckers, you. Except Dcc, she's terrible. I hope she has a horrible Christmas. Apparently, my tradition this year is to write long winded theoretical posts about the health care bill and debate with grits and others. I will be ending this tradition quickly (I can hear the roar of applause even now). The one tradition I would like to start this Christmas would involve my dog not waking my ornery ass up at 5:15 a.m. Or my wife elbowing my sleeping ass to get up at 5:15. Yeah, that would work for me. I do hope the tradition from Christmas last year, eating with the tards (real tards, mind you, not those fake lightweight ones) continues.
Wife got me a portrait done of my boston terrier, Otis. A perfect compliment to my framed picture of him and my mouse pad.
I'm playing my first gig in over 2 years tonight, with my new band. We're second on the bill out of four, which means plenty of drinking time before I attempt to get home earlier than midnight. The Christmas hangover is an unwelcome but inevitable occurrence. Happy boozing, folks.
Being that we are now approaching Christmas, I just wanted to take a moment and extend to you, my friends, a special holiday message from the heart...Fuck you guys. Two nights ago, I hopped on a plane to Southern California for a few days so the cold, the awkward conversations with the people you hate most in the world (your family), and the shopping malls and their overloaded parking lots can all kiss my ass. Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas from Communist Cuba! I have to cook the turkey for the office party, and I have no idea what I'm doing. 3:1 odds someone ends up in the hospital with food poisoning. Next Christmas, I'll be in the sandbox.
Happy holidays! I love youse all! I haven't lurked much in these past couple of weeks because I've been running around like a velociraptor with it's head cut off. With the exception of a flavor injector that the old man knew a week ago that he wanted to get, and waited until today to say "Yeah, we still need to buy that," all grocery and present shopping for tonight and tomorrow is finished. All the santa gifts were wrapped last night, we just have to put them under the tree tonight and stuff the stockings. One of the gifts for my daughter is the Furreal kitty named Lulu. It is in demo mode right now, so it meows at the slightest movement, blinks and lifts it's paw. When I was wrapping it the other night, my Forreal cat Lola did not like it at ALL. She was hissing, bushing her tail, and making yowling noises whenever I touched the other kitty. After she attacked the box, we had to banish her to the other room so I could finish wrapping and put the thing back up in the attic. Tomorrow morning ought to be fun. My daughter's expression when she picks up the box and it meows at her will be memorable. And when she opens the box, the Lola vs. Lulu Smackdown will begin. It should be available next week on PPV.
Merry Christmas or happy holidays from Iraq. I wish all you the best and hope all your wishes come true. But someone eat extra stuffing for me and everyone crack a beer or mix a drink for me.
What are you clowns getting this year? Last year I got Jordans, and this year, well, Jordans. (I am a washed up basketball player who has a major show fetish. And I'm white.) I got the wife a coach wallet and some perfume. I think I did ok. Are you giving or getting anything good?
To all y'all boo hooing about having to spend time with your family: Go suck a dick and while you're at it think about all our military members who would give anything to be with their family right now.
Christmas Eve church service was me attempting to embarass the hell out of my family by making them laugh. Away in a Manger was dubbed over by You Farted You Bastard, I kept saying things to my sister about communion like ¨That cracker tastes like SHIT!¨ or ¨Isn´t giving wine to a retarded guy (a 30 year old retarded guy goes to the church with his family) like double or nothing?¨ or ¨This is the shittiest karaoke bar I´ve ever seen!¨ when the solo singers went up. I also may have yelled ¨Freebird¨ with a candle in my hand. My mother made us leave by the side exit. Mission accomplished.
Finished my Christmas shopping today and just picked up a gift for myself. A half an ounce of some beautiful greenery.
Wow. Jägerette's mom went to the store to get a ham. She made the mistake of going to the deli. They gave her a whole one of these:
The Gf got me some new Oakleys and other assorted knick knacks. She got a ring from Tiffany. No, not an engagement ring, just a ring that she wanted. Two family Christmas things tomorrow (I actually like my family), and then I'll come home and proceed to get shit housed on cheap booze. Merry Christmas.