Survey Man-ness.

Stop and think for a second about the type of cretins who would actually sit there and fill out an Askmen.com survey. Exactly. This is as representative of the actual population of men as that "holla for a dolla" family is representative of Americans.

And that's being charitable. There's a possibility Askmen simply made up all that bullshit. That way, they can get incredulous people seriously discussing the list and men's secret love of socks, instead of ignoring it as the useless trash it is.

 

This question struck me as particularly flawed because it doesn't take in to account one main factor, which is age.

If you're 18 and you're worried if your next girlfriend will be the one you're crazy.

If you're 38 and have the same concern it seems to me that it is more legitimate.

 

Well, 6% of men apparently gauge penis size by talking about or comparing penises with their buddies.

I can, with all honesty, say I have never once pulled out my dick and compared it with a friend's dick. Who the fuck would do that?

Somebody on this Board has to be one of the 6%. Fess up.

 

Cufflinks.... maybe with a nice suit for a nice occasion, or a wedding tux. That's about it for me. Pocket Squares..... what you have here is the douchebag version on the clip-on tie, and that's the way it's always been. I think you would look like less of an asshole if you had a ripped Rice Krispie Square wrapper hanging out of your pocket.

Us men of proud "average size" really DON'T give a shit, period. We fall into the category of "Can get the job done so don't hate yourself". And don't act like that's not a two-way street. Women always say size doesn't matter. These are the same women that say things like bald men are sexy. I don't know many models that are into a bald man with a small cock. Unless he has coke.

Of course, having a Gi-normous shlong is more of a curse than a blessing, unless it's your hobby to give females urinary tract infections.

 

You mean ... *sniff*... its not real?

 

Seriously, just a question, why does your first entry into the conversation have to be some condescending knock on the discussion. Not every conversation has to be about Higgs Boson or debates on the problems of a two party political system. You always remind me of the Harvard dude from Good Will Hunting.



But more to the point...

I remember when I was younger I thought Steve Madden shoes were the shit. Then I started wearing their dress shoes regularly for my first internship and realized that they broke down pretty quick. Our next door neighbors for awhile and one of my Dad's good friends was the CFO of Allen Edmonds so thats all my Dad wears and I've had a few pair. They're awesome.

I personally have probably 15-20 pairs of assorted shoes. Why? Cause I like shoes, same reason some people have a ton of watches, or jeans, or hoodies. To each's own.

To me, this was one of the most ridiculous statements:

Not "what is a good quality in a potential wife?" but what is a romantic gesture? What low standards these dudes must have.

 

OMG! We're all doomed!

I have two kinds of socks: Black, and White. Nether of which have an impact on anything: ever.


Seriously; if this is what counts, then I really am living in a Bret Easton Ellis novel...

 

Man, y'all are strangely averse to a guy putting any forethought into his shoes or any other clothing item. Do y'all just get dressed at random every day? I mean, I don't wear pocket squares or cuff links because I rarely dress to that level of formality, but if you're wearing fancy clothes, why the fuck not?

You do realize there are places you can't wear shit-kicking boots, right? Or times you might just not want to?

If someone goes to college with the primary goal of meeting women, their fiscal choices confuse me.

 

For some reason - ^that^ statement makes me imagine the survey participants are these guys.



Back to shoes for a moment. I work w/ a man that wears the same nasty ass brown shoes every.single.day and has for the three years I've been here. Usually w/ black dress pants and ankle socks. I don't what troubles me more. The brown shoes w/ the black pants, or the friggin' ankle socks (which are generally white btw).

Call me prejudice, but I don't think men should be wearing ankles socks of any colour, at any time, ever.

edited to add (because damn work keeps getting in the way of posting a complete thought today): The black/brown pant/shoe combo combined w/ the white ankle socks just makes me think this guy doesn't really care what he looks like. Do I like men that go nuts over their appearance? No. Do I like men that wear white ankle socks w/ brown shoes and black pants? No. Thankfully most men I know fall into the happy medium category.

 

Even at the gym?

 

Okay-the gym is the only possible leeway I'll give on ankle socks ... and maybe dressed in drag as Lucille Ball.

 

Alt-Focus: Dear TiBers, per this recent article, what would you do if you shot your own dick off? Wait 8 years for someone to make you a new penis out of a cadaver bone and some of your forearm skin? Sex change to a chick? Suicide?

 

Gives new meaning to boner eh? Ba-dum chhhh

 

Jesus ... that's just creepy. And he's seventeen now? Forgive me if my memory is failing me here, but isn't the the age where you boys begin wanting to screw .... well ... everything? What's the warranty on that puppy?

I don't even want to get into the practicality and functional logistics here of a cadaver bone/forearm skin makeshift willy.

 

To start with, I LOVE bald/shaved heads. A dude with a shaved head and an awesome beard is basically my kryptonite. Whatever, it's weird and I don't even care.

Also, though, I don't think any of these women are saying "Size doesn't matter, come fuck me with your microscopic cock." But frequently an average sized/girthy dick is much more enjoyable than some gigantic schlong. Nerve endings predominantly in the first couple inches of the vagina or whatever.

AND, I think it's terrifying that 50+% of men never get STI tested and that a majority of men think that 10 sex partners is too many for their significant other to have had.

 

I'm kinda disappointed this number is so low because that phrasing is hilarious:

Re: shaved head, the thing is that when women say this, they mean Bruce Willis, not George Costanza.

 

It's a condescending knock on a survey that is either poorly executed or completely made-up, yes.

Nice try starting more off-topic shit with me though, completely unrelated to the focus itself. You have a ways to go until you can top this one, though.

 

I will buy a pair of Allen Edmonds for when I have another office job, they are tits and for $300/pair, they had better be. But, I am currently breaking in a pair of Red Wings, oiling and polishing them more sensually than I do my own penis. They, too, are tits. This is my second pair, the first only bit the dust due to a combination of me being a lazy asshole, concrete accumulation and mold.

When it comes to socks, I pretty much only wear SmartWool. They are expensive as shit, but I still have socks from 5 years ago that have survived trips to five 3rd world countries. I will totally rock full-length wool socks to the gym.