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Stealing Shit

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by pincinelly, Oct 29, 2010.

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  1. Prefontaine

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    At night, my co-workers and I sometimes steal the range balls off the public golf course next to our office. The next day, we usually end up hitting them back onto the range. We are just cheap and don't feel like paying $12 for a full bucket of balls 4x/week.

    Range balls must have a phenomenal ROI for golf courses...
     
  2. Now Slappy

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    Stealing sucks. I could get on a soap box right now, but what's the point? In my experience people will justify just about anything to make themselves feel better.

    When I worked in the shipping industry(boats, not packages) a thief was the worst type of person aboard, and would be feted out mighty quick. When you're offshore and shit starts to go missing it's pretty easy to find out who the culprit is, and that individual was usually dealt with in blanket-party-esqe fashion.

    For those of you who think stealing is "ok" or "it's just from Goodwill, they won't miss it", I suggest you read Dante's Inferno and check out which level of hell the thieves end up. For the record, I think he got it right.
     
  3. Solaris

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    I'm not going to get on my high horse, but supermarkets are profit making enterprises. The profits made go to some fatcat's who didn't put much sweat and tears into the business (at least not compared to the children working in sweatshops making some of the shit).

    Goodwill is designed to improve the quality of life for people, stealing from it is really unforgivable and incomparable to stealing from supermarkets.

    Anyway, private property is theft. Red-dot away.
     
  4. shegirl

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    Yes all stealing is wrong and this is a thread about stealing however, you'll notice no one else stole from a fucking charity. You need to stop. You're not helping yourself.

    As for everyone else circling him like wolves, yes, we all know he's an idiot you don't need to point it out. And quite obviously he's convinced himself that there's no real harm in his actions so your efforts are futile. Everyone, including you oswald, leave it be.
     
  5. TwoTooFar

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    I went through a klepto phase during my first couple years of college. It only happened when I was beyond retarded shitfaced, which was quite a bit, but my thing was to take shit from bars. At one time I had a large assortment of billiard balls, glasses, pitchers, posters and whatever else I could get my hands on. I'm not sure what motivated me to do that, as I had never stolen a damn thing prior to that, but it happened.

    I did recently use my phone to take a picture of a great fish taco recipe while in a book store. I guess that counts.
     
  6. Disgustipated

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    It's a sad indictment on Western culture when an Xbox becomes "some necessary shit for living". Your actions, sir, are indicative of the bullshit justification used by people who will take anything not nailed down and under 24 hour security watch. I dare you to make a convincing argument of where Xbox fits in on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Enjoy your karma.

    Many supermarkets, especially chains, are public companies with stock and shareholders. A majority of the stock holding ultimately trickles down to mum and dad investors who have these shares as their nest egg. This is who gets the bulk of the non-retained profit. Your view is an over simplified, shallow view of the truth of things.

    To put it in real terms: if your 401K/superannuation/nest egg/whatever disappears then you'll be the one going to Goodwill in the future.

    Yes, on the face of it, stealing from Goodwill is worse than stealing from Walmart. But shit will always trickle downhill. Ultimately, there could be little difference between the recipients of either.
     
  7. Spoz

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    I had magnetic hands as a kid. I'd walk through shops and objects would fly off the shelves and CLUNK into my pockets. Eventually my dad caught me, and used his police connections to scare me straight. Cue montage of ~15 years of being good (in the theft department at least).

    More recently, as I've become interested in urban exploring, I've felt the need to test my ninja-skills a few times. Generally it's part of our "code of ethics" to not take anything. Not only because if caught somewhere we're not supposed to be we'll have a theft charge added to the list, but also because we really do respect the locations we visit. Unfortunately, for me like many others, stealing objects from clubs seems like a good idea after too many drinks. Last time - after my ninja abilities were challenged by a friend - the object of choice happened to be the bouncers clipboard. I wasn't caught, but if I was, at this particular club I would have got my ass absolutely handed to me by the bouncers. Bad idea.

    My favourite thing I've ever stolen though? A CAT scan. I was wandering through the vet sciences building at my uni one night and found a CAT scanner sitting in the middle of a large room with an open door. A lone green light proved enough to entice me in, and two hours later I had it all figured out. On a related note I now have significantly less respect for radiology degrees. For those of you wondering, I didn't put my head in there, but rather my camera. Still have the film.
     
  8. Wadget

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    Well I feel sorry for you for an entirely different reason.

    FOCUS: Back in highschool we used to steal candy bars from the same supermarket pretty much everyday, until we got caught and banned from that store. For Life.

    That was a low day.
     
  9. 31stday

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    I am not a hooligan like you guys unfortunately, but the same cannot be said for my friends.

    Second week of college staying in dorms, my friend steals a solid 500 cookies. They were just sitting on a table with no one watching them, and he just took them. He was so excited about it too, he literally used my phone just so he could text his roommate that he stole 500 cookies.

    Next week, a different friend decides to be a badass and steal something from Dairy Queen. He stole a cake. There was a bunch of us there just getting food when he makes the choice to just take it. He picks the cake out of the freezer, flips the camera off and just walks out. No questions asked. The shitty thing was I was the only one who hadn't got my food yet and everyone else had eaten and were now bailing, and I ended up sitting with some random girls I knew. Coincidentally, I'm now banging one of those girls pretty much because of that night. The guy who stole the cake is getting evicted from dorms in about 4 days because of other incidences.
     
  10. Dr. Gonzo Esquire

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    I'm about to out myself as a geek but whatever.

    In high school some friends and I would go to an annual anime/comic expo in my area. The place was generally packed and was of course filled with real as well as bootleg DVDs. Well, we used to five finger the shit out of any DVD that looked even remotely entertaining. Hell, most of my kung fu collection was stolen from that expo. The place was so congested that it was laughably easy to just grab a DVD and throw it in my coat pocket or bag.
     
  11. AyHy

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    I don't steal, but shoplifting really does pay.

    I've got a buddy who was busted for shoplifting at K-Mart. He got slapped with a $600 fine or something. He estimates that, before they got him, he must have lifted at least $10,000 worth of merchandise from that store - probably more.

    He's also applied at two clothing stores specifically to take clothes home; he thinks he would have accrued a $100,000 wardrobe if he didn't store much of it in garbage bags in his grandmother's garage, which she mistook for actual trash.

    The thing is - there are a lot of guys like this, and does their theft hurt the retail stores? Nope - it gets passed right on to guys like me. Which makes me feel like an utter sucker for not stealing my fair share. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, I'm too much of a coward.
     
  12. BL1Y

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    My old apartment had a balcony with three steps leading up to the door. Just outside in the interior hall of the building was one of the stairwells with a sign that said Stairs A. The sign kept falling off, and I'd usually stick it back on the wall, but I eventually just decided to keep it for myself, and put it up on my wall next to the balcony door.

    I had a lot of guests asking me where Stairs B were.
     
  13. IAmWillIAm

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    Alt. Focus: I work in the loss preventions department at a very large clothing store, and I've got to say, having this job has really ruined my opinion of people. I've arrested grandmothers stealing hundreds of dollars of merchandise, and I once arrested an 11 year old girl for shoplifting over $600 of baby's clothes for her 1 year old child. Ultimately, if you're stealing from a store with a decent loss preventions team, you will get caught. Not only will you be charged with theft, but you will likely get sued by the store to help recuperate the costs of having a loss preventions team.
     
  14. Bogan

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    I used to work at Australia's bastard-child equivalent of Walmart through undergrad. Our store was one of the busiest in the state and we got our fair share of thieves. We had some pretty good loss prevention guys, one of whose hobbies while not working included getting huge, ju jitsu and full sleeve tattoos. Seeing people caught by this bloke shit themselves was hilarious. Anyway, stories of note I can remember:

    -We noticed we were consistently losing a shitload on Melways (street directories, cost ~$30ea). Turns out a middle-aged woman was coming in and putting a compost bin in her trolley, filling it with Melways and rolling out the register. The bin would stay in the trolley as it was 'too heavy/big'. She was finally caught when one of the register people finally looked inside, which they're supposed to do always. She did this at a number of stores and was selling them down at the local market.

    -I once babysat and wrote up the haul of a guy who had been caught stealing ~50 DVDs while the police were on their way. He claimed they were for his kids for Christmas - sure your kid needs Fight Club and various martial arts movies.

    -My favourite story is of the guy who was caught stuffing batteries down his pants and in his socks. He turned violent and was promptly dropped to the ground and sat on while in some sort of restraining hold by our 110 kg loss prevention officer (unfortunately not ju jitsu guy). About 10-15 minutes later I was talking to a coworker in the main aisle and laughing at this moron when a white trash bogan woman comes up to us with 'I assume you two arseholes are laughing about my husband, where the fuck is he?' My reply of 'face down in his own shame in the shoe department' was not met with much joy.

    -A bunch of guys I worked with were fired after Christmas one year for stealing drinks while working every day for a month. We were doing that much overtime for free that year that our managers probably would have bought us dinner and drinks had we asked. Just stupid.

    I got caught stealing a couple of bottles of Coke off the back of a delivery truck by the driver when I was about 13. Nothing serious happened, though I just about shat myself and felt awful as he said he personally has to pay for losses. I also vaguely remember drunkenly pinching a bunch of roadworks signs and decking out a mates garage after his 18th party. His parents made us return them the next day.
     
  15. gramouflage

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    Larceny has never been my criminal preference though I have pulled a few drunk high school heists - a garden gnome and some pumpkins from an outdoor display come to mind but there were probably a few more.

    While in Savannah in July I started off drinking at the hotel bar then blacked out and woke up with my pockets full of these things. Taking them was likely risky and certainly childish but they brighten up the room and my spirits when drinking alone in the dark.
    [​IMG]
     
  16. clkx88

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    Was this a department store in Romania?
     
  17. rei

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    Working for a major grocery chain, LP might be a bit different, we're good, but we aren't THAT good.
     
  18. ZJB

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    So like a lot of you I tend to steal a lot of shit when I am drunk. I have a friend who likes to buy food from convenience stores after we leave the bar. Whenever I am with him I fill my pockets with anything I can get my hands on and I haven't been caught yet.

    The biggest thing I have stolen was a keg, and yes I was drunk when i stole this too. I was at a shitty bar by my friends house. I was playing pool with a couple of my firends and the waitress was a bitch. She took forever to ask us for orders and to bring us our drinks even though the bar wasn't busy(lame justification for my behaviour). At this bar they stupidly kept some kegs next to the back exit of the bar. When my friend went to pay our tab I grabbed a keg and lifted it outside of the back door. My firiend and I then left the bar through the fornt door and went around back and carried the keg home.

    The next weekend was a blast. We had a kegger and I went time travelling.
     
  19. Nate17

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    Inadvertently took 100+ pictures out of Wal-Mart. I had processed them at the film counter, the lady handed them to me, said their register was down. I walked up front, and I guess they thought I had paid for them in the back. I never checked up, until I got to the truck. I went back to pay. Other than that, just the normal bubble gum when I was a kid.
     
  20. Nettdata

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    I once stole an old, dead topic's ability to accept new posts. Was never caught.
     
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