And what I'm saying, without authorization, is that for most guys, those earth shatterers can come from either head OR vag. What girls are telling us is that clit vs vag is a whole different category.
Welcome to the exception to the rule, population: me. Having an orgasm non-vaginally (oral, masturbation and I'll pass on buttsecks) feels way not as good. In my experience, I've almost passed out after a good cervix painting. There is absolutely zero desire after cumming into or onto a girl to do it again for a little while, at least. Whereas with jerking it or oral, I can be pretty well ready to go in a minute or two.
No I do not think all orgasms are equal, but the urge to achieve them is*. Put me in the boat of dudes that find, overall, that BJ orgasms feel better than vaginal induced ones. The physical sensation, when done properly, is worlds apart. The suction part alone puts it a cut above, add in pressure from the tongue and you have a grip of ecstasy not even the tightest kegal gripping pussy can achieve. But if a girl is off on her technique, with terrible suction and sloppy rhythm, and god forbid...teeth, it can be a struggle just to complete. Pussy has it's own set of plusses, the soft sticky velvet feeling is AWESOME and not reproducible with the mouth. But at least for me, it doesn't stimulate the nerve endings on my cock the way a girls mouth can. But there are varying degrees with vaginal as well. You have to look at the totality of the situation, if it is hot and steamy and the girl is super attractive I am going to cum harder than humping away on some plumper. There are also other things that can contribute to the degree of pleasure achieved. For mind bending near coma inducing orgasms. The three biggest seem to be, length of time between hooking up, a sort of series of building up and stopping just before the point of no return, and a theory I have that we all sort of autoerotic asphyxiate to some degree leading up to it. This was all deduced through a lifetime of masturbation testing: The first might just be the hardest as implied in my first sentence of this post the urge to achieve an orgasm seems to always be as strong. So putting off cranking it or hooking up when you have a solid hook up can be a task on itself. But every time Ive completely stopped for a long period of time (going for more than a week is pert near impossible). But the first one back is always a blow out, particularly when coupled with the other two. Two, during the act a series of building up to the very brink and then stopping to relax over and over until you can't handle it anymore. I remember a poster here once claimed to have tried this on a girl figuring it'd work the same on her and she almost kicked him out of bed for stopping. Anyway, this can be more difficult when hooking up with a girl. Since my hand and dick are physiologically linked through my brain (and through the sheer number of practice), it is much easier not to fuck up and go to far to soon. But Beejs and vag sex feel much better than your hand so your girl is going to want to try and practice this. Three, now if you aren't weirded out as it is with this post, buckle up. Just through casual observation I noticed while cranking it that I did some things that would lend credit to how much more intense depriving your brain of oxygen makes your orgasms. I tend to lock my legs out, hard, leading up to and during it. Ive read this can lead to passing out and know a girl in middle school choir did just that. I seem to involuntarily hold my breath as well immediately before cuming, this basically creates my "oh" face. Lastly, I tend to creak my neck down and force my chin towards my chest which I guess sort of slows the blood in the arteries in my neck a bit. Not that I was trying to do any of this, but since you are so focused at the task at hand, I had to consciously think about what was going on just to realize what I was doing in that instant. Sometimes when I get it just right it feels like taking a hit of nitrous with the "wahn wahn wahn wahn" feeling minus the giggling. Doing this with a girl works best if you are on the bottom and don't have to thrust as much. I guess combining all three with a hot chick would be the be all end all. But honestly it isn't possible every single time, or practical, and just busting a quick nut off is all I want. Thank you and goodnight... *this is what leads to banging out a fat chick while drunk as shit.
Fucking a fat chick is a bit like riding a tricycle, yeah it can be fun for a short time but you don't want anyone you know see you do it.
As a male, I have only ever had one "multiple" orgasm. I was recovering from a cold at the time and had been taking Sudafed PE (containing phenylephrine) instead of the proper Sudafed containing Pseudoephedrine. I was fucking my ex-girlfriend doggy style for a good while and got up to about the 15 minute mark and was finding it a hard to come. Determined not to be denied, I pulled out and jerked off while telling her to stay where she was. I climaxed without ejaculating, more of a "in my head" orgasm. Then I stuck it back in and went ahead and fucked her until I came again with ejaculating. Im not sure if the medication had anything to do with it. I kinda miss her, she had a damn fine body, 5'9' and a classic 36-24-36 type figure with DD titts.
My orgasms are far better when my partner is deep inside of me. I can have incredible orgasms when being orally stimulated but they just aren't as toe-curling, scream inducing, goosebump inspiring as when vaginally induced (which can be clitoral, g-spot or both, as this class has taught). My level of orgasms vary, masturbating produces varied results, depending on a plethora of factors. I know how to get myself off expediantly or powerfully, but it's never as good as pulling someone in as deep as he'll go, running my hands across his taut body, hearing him breathing hard to finish me....ahem, sorry kids. This thread is hard to stay focused on.
So, I've just been listening to the Savage Love podcast, and for those of you lucky enough to live in West Seattle (or, who are willing to travel for a chance at a wetter life), there is a woman called... Haiko Lopez or similar that runs squirting workshops. Yes. Squirting workshops. Now, this particular squirting coach is batshit insane (squirting is linked to your willingness to cry and express emotion, and is a reflection of the link between your heart and your vag - direct quote), but it got me looking around (it also introduced me to the phrase 'nascent female prostate tissue, which is awesome). For all of you that have expressed sadness at your lack of ability to squirt (0 at last count, but I'm hopeful), may I present Club Eden. http://www.clubvibes.com/forum/topic.aspx?id=464679 Where's JoJo and his playground when you need him? I would love to hear a TiBette report back. Nom?
Some orgasms are definitely more intense than others (masturbating to internet porn for the third time that day would be on the low end of the scale, fucking an attractive girl would be higher, masturbating on a quadriplegic midget's stomach would be at the high end) but the overall feeling is basically the same. Generally speaking I prefer sex to getting head, but it's a lot easier to sit back and watch Deadliest Warrior while receiving a blowjob.
So, some have orgasms that are basically the same, and others have different kinds of orgasms. However, is there a difference in orgasm if their is an emotional connection, and how so? How big of difference (if any of course) is there between a casual fuck and a serious relationship? Ladies, can you give your input too? I think I could do a dissertation on this thread.
I'm not sure I experience a huge difference because of an emotional connection, however, the kind of sex I have in a relationship lends itself to more intense experiences. When you both know each other, what the other one likes, are frequently in the kind of situations or places to have more intense sex, maybe you're more comfortable with what you want or need or how you feel... I think that just tends to lend itself to a stronger experience. Not to say that a casual hookup can't be really hot, I just find that sex with someone you're comfortable with, on average, is better. Not to say that the actual emotional connection itself can't be good, or can't add something to it.
Emotional connection helps. Or maybe I'm just reaching that thirty-ish peak. I've had some wild, random (read: public, what's his name again?) hook-ups that were pretty damn intense, but the sex I've been having lately tops all that easily. Fully immersing yourself in the experience makes it that much better. That being said, there's a squirting link I need to click on...
This. I am not really seeing what emotional connection you girls are thinking about or wanting out of us here. Like he said, you do sort of want to please her more, sexually, if you two are in a serious relationship, which leads to a stronger experience. But in the moment of truth does thinking of our emotional connection make it a better physical experience? I don't think so, my mind is usually squarely focused on the hot sex act taking place when Im bustin a nut all up in ya'. Afterwards in the afterglow I think the ego satisfaction is much much higher and satisfying if you are in an intense relationship.
I think the emotional connection during sex has nothing to do with the sex itself. Its about how quickly I want you to leave after.
I think there is a distinct difference between orgasms via vaginal and oral sex. To paraphrase Chris Rock, the first time a girl sucked the cum outta my dick and swallowed I thought I could read Arabic. For me, the sensation is clearly better. My theory as to why is that it's all the same feelings of sex, without having to do the thrust-work, so instead of the cum getting pushed/forced out, it's getting pulled out. And that's awesomeness. As mentioned by others, this applies only when the girl REALLY knows how to work it. There can be no thrusting or stroking on my part at all for it to be THAT good, which unfortunately means I've had no more than thirty of these kinds of orgasms in my life (not that I'm complaing at fucking all). When they do happen, I'm literally immobile for minutes, completely vulnerable, in some sort of collapsed position, often drooling. It's the freakin' best. I still don't think it's as 'different' as girls experience between G-spot/clit orgasms, but it's in the same, uh, area. As for emotional connections, from a guy's perspective, I agree with others who said it doesn't really affect the actual orgasm itself, but truly caring for someone deeply increases the likelihood of having hotter sex, overall. Ooh, that makes me think of another sex topic not often talked about. Not sure how much/if you were joking, but for me (and I assume many other guys?), sometimes the urge to leave is nearly overwhelming. Like, not only do I not want to cuddle, I seriously don't want to be in the same room. I feel bad, and it's not that hard to overcome, but I can feel something in my primal brain going "alrighty, that's done, now let's get the fuck outta here!". What's crazy is how instant it sometimes is, as in, I'm still coming down from the orgasm high and already wanting to jet. Even sometimes after I jack it, I just wanna...leave, which is kinda weird.
A while ago I had a huge laugh when out drinking with a group of friends; one friend of a friend who is a police detective and not afraid to speak his mind described to us how he pulled a hamstring while he was furiously jerking off in the shower.
That's just it. Casual sex exists to prevent the sort of intimacy that love creates. That's why the sudden urge to bolt can be overwhelming. Once fornicating has ceased, its all that crap that happens after, that makes it intimate.(for me at least) You can either leave and get a sub from Jimmy Johns or you can stay and cuddle and talk about feelings n shit. When its a rando, most people won't have much to say except, "So, uhh, can I get your number or something?" It reminds me of the wallet threat that chicks make on dates so it doesn't seem disingenuous. Going through the motions so the girl doesn't feel worthless right away. Jesus, I'm fucked.
I'm pretty sure this is mutual though between guys and girls, especially if it's a random hookup. Neither one wants to talk about what happened, cuddle, or any shit like that. They both got into it knowing full well that they don't want to know anything about the other person besides what each other look like naked. I know most of the time I stick around after doing the deed, it's to pass out, get seconds in the morning, and then get a ride home, maybe breakfast. I really don't want to try to work through those awkward morning after conversations, if I stay that long. As with those one nighters, since there is no emotional connection whatsoever, the sex/climax seems less important or not as intense or doesn't feel as great as with a serious girlfriend...although I have had many more one nighters than serious girlfriends so my experience is limited with the relationshippy hookups. The sex has for the most part, been better with the girlfriend types, and thus, the climax was better, at least in my memory it was.
Totally, but I meant anytime. Like you said, with one-nighters leaving is just part of the whole general experience, but there are times, with a girlfriend or even just a regular booty call, where I want to fuck off immediately after sex. It's rare -- 10% of the time at most -- and easy enough to overcome, but it's honestly startling at times when I have to kinda...fake that I still even wanna be in the room, let alone touch the girl (it's even happened after particularly passionate, emotional sex). I assume it's something deep in my primal brain that thousands of years ago would have been beneficial in some way, because telling your girlfriend that you have to force wanting to be next to her after sex is most certainly not beneficial these days, but now I'm not as sure. I mean, I'm not ginger, so I must have a soul -- maybe it's just a bit broken?