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So much cooler online...

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Samr, May 9, 2010.

  1. Samr

    Samr
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    In the employer's defense, many times it comes down to a cost/benefit matter on the subject of liability. As in:

    "If you're employee did this ____, and you knew he/she had a conviction for doing this ____, would you be held liable for at least some of the damages resulting from what the employee did? And if so, would the financial/brand/HR cost of that lawsuit outweigh the cost of not having this person as a member of your staff?"

    Give you an example: Say a VIA bus struck and killer a another person in a car while on his route. Say that the contention in the incident was whether or not the VIA bus driver was over the posted speed limit/was on his cell phone. If he was speeding/distracted, it'd show a lack of judgement. Also say that VIA bus driver had a conviction for possession of marijuana fifteen years ago, which again, potentially, could show a lack of judgement (and you know damn well the opposing lawyers would argue that it does). Doesn't matter how long ago it was, VIA "should" have recognized that this individual theoretically lacked proper judgement. End result is, right or wrong, win or lose, that VIA gets sued off their ass for damages that could have been avoided if they simply didn't hire this guy based upon his conviction over a decade ago.

    Take this to Facebook: You know that this person drinks/gambles/posts inappropriate shit online. Is he/she therefore worth the risk of liability/your job (for hiring the person) if this individual screws up on the clock and it's on you?

    You get an HR guy with 200 applicants, 20 of whom are all equally qualified for the job and interview the same. He can only hire one. Well guess what? He's going to throw out seven of them for using the wrong "there" on their resumes, he's going to weed another five for not being able to get ahold of a few of their references, he's going to toss another one because the dude wore to the interview a class ring of a college he hates, and he's going to trash the rest just because he doesn't like them. If he can find your your Facebook/Myspace/eharmony/whatever account it just gives him more ammo.

    Is it fair? Fuck no. But if you want the job, you've got to play by their rules, not yours.
     
  2. Czechvodkabaron

    Czechvodkabaron
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    Reading this thread reminds me: does anybody use MySpace anymore?

    It doesn't seem like it. I guess it declined in popularity when Facebook started adding all the features that were once unique to Myspace. I shut down my profile a few years ago (and recently my Facebook profile as well) and am pretty sure that I do not know anybody who still uses it on a regular basis.
     
  3. Fernanthonies

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    Unless your are a middle school girl, a middleschool boy with a shitty punk band, or a really ghetto black person...then no.
     
  4. mad5427

    mad5427
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    My wife is a teacher and has to be very careful what she posts places and what information she divulges. All it takes is one wrong picture of her out drinking or anything like that and a student sees it, tells somebody, she's gone. Very scary.

    I don't have to worry as much about that, but you never know what will happen down the road. I've always tried to act online the same way that I'd act in person. I don't need to stroke my ego online. I know who I am, good and bad.

    I actually met my wife online almost five years ago. I had gotten out of a series of bad relationships with people I had met in traditional ways, like bars, book stores, through friends, etc. and nothing was working out. A couple friends of mine joined eHarmony and met some cool people who shared interests. They highly recommended it, after a few months of being hounded, I gave it a shot. Met a few cool women, some very horrible ones. Went on a date with one girl who I only saw a head shot from. Beautiful face, seemed normal, turns out she had a very small head on a body that was disturbingly large. You could never tell from a head shot photo. Why the hell would she not divulge this. She knew that I was training for a marathon and exercised regularly, biked and hiked a lot. She lied about so much.

    Then I met my now wife. We just clicked. We had a lot of similarities, but a lot of differences too. But the differences were things we were interested in or things we were striving for in ourselves. Our first date was to a specific art exhibit that was happening. We ended up focusing so much on each other and just talking and getting to know each other. The rest was history. My wife went on due to getting out of a long term relationship and then having her life be devoted to grad school for a good year and a half. She wanted to meet new people and wasn't planning on meeting anybody seriously. Then I showed up. Again, rest is history.

    I think the people who are successful in online dating are the ones who look at it as just another place to meet somebody. It's really no different than a bar, grocery store, party, you name it. As long as you are open and honest about who you are and aren't afraid of putting yourself out there, it can work. Hell, they're going to see you anyways, why not just be upfront from the get go. They like you cool, they don't no biggie. Move on. Similar to any other social environment.

    So, it has worked out well for me.

    One of the reasons I like this place and liked RMMB is that there is a fairly high level of people who seem to be acting real. The ones who aren't don't seem to stick around. What I type on here and on other forums is exactly what I'd say and how I'd act in person. If anybody ever cataloged my online presence it would be no different than the real world so I shouldn't ever have any privacy problems. I also only put online what I feel comfortable having the whole world know.
     
  5. PoppaBear

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    I agree with this, but I wanted to add one thing--I think that there's a large age gap on this board, from my perspective at least, as I'm in university still.

    I think that once I hold a job and have a few years under my belt, and am not in university any more, I'll "click" more with TiB. Hell, someone posted a rave yesterday about having a heart attack two weeks ago, and then having their daughter born yesterday.
    I cannot relate to that. At all. I can say "congratulations", but it's on another level that I don't think I can begin to understand yet.

    It's not like I don't like coming here though. Honestly, this board seems to be full of some adults who are mature in every sense of the word, yet still have that child-like mischievousness that sparkles through all the time.

    FOCUS: I have a facebook and am now considering deleting it. Whoever I really want to get in contact with, I can do so without facebook. And I can take my own pictures, I have a camera. Those are my two main reasons for even being on that sight.
     
  6. mad5427

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    It's funny that you mention the heart attack and baby being born in quoting me. That actually was me.

    I'm actually very very young for a heart attack. I'm only 32. Very very young. I don't have heart disease or congestive heart failure. I am not perfectly healthy as there is a little bit of soft plaque in the arteries. Probably similar to most who have grown up eating fast food and not flossing as much as they should. My issue happened because of a perfect storm. If I went in the day before, they would have laughed at me and told me to go home and just eat a little better. Maybe given me a small dose pill for blood pressure at most as my numbers showed the beginnings of pre-hypertension. Most likely caused by stress, which has been huge in my life the past few years. The storm was this bit of plaque, slightly high blood pressure, coupled with a very long bike ride, 3 hours to be exact, in high heat. I was dehydrated even after drinking and eating quite a bit before and during the ride and still exhausted my system. Couple bringing my heart to a very high level of stress with the other factors, bam. Bad things. Not age related at all. I was actually told that similar things happen to athletes who drop in their twenties with no other warnings. This can happen to people at a lot of different ages. Thankfully I wasn't stubborn and called 911 knowing something wasn't right as I rode that amount all the time. I have no long term damage and should be stronger than I was before in about a year or so. I'm lucky. People can learn from this regardless of age.

    This place does have large amount of people from all walks of life, men and women, with a good age range. I disagree a bit with you needing to age more to "click" here. Going back to the whole idea that if you're pretty honest about who you are, what you know, your interests, etc. it should be very easy to fit in. I can't tell you how much I've learned from reading others experiences both younger and older than me on this the the old RMMB site. And it's coupled with a lot of ridiculousness, which makes it that much better.

    Back to the focus, I am getting more and more leary of Facebook as time goes on and they delve further into your privacy. As much as I love how that site has reconnected me with so many people from every major phase of life, they are toeing a scary privacy line. I am very careful about what I say on there and what I share. I keep my preferences as tightly secure as possible. I'm pretty much an open book and have no trouble talking about most things in my life as I have very little regrets and nothing to hide, but there is still something that's even frightening me about the level of which they could delve into your life if you're not careful.
     
  7. Solaris

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    I swear I've read about 10 anti-facebook articles in different media formats today telling me why I should delete my account. Why is this all news all of a sudden?

    I still don't give a fuck. 'Oh no facebook knows I like Nick Cohen and advertises his new book to me'. Who gives a flying fuck? I actually did start applying for jobs today and have since made my profile private.

    It's all over hyped bullshit, Facebook is fun and harmless. The only problems seem to be when your friends are fucktards. I love facebook, it's a brilliant service and fuck the media for raking on it non-stop.
     
  8. Travis3

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    I don't do Facebook or MySpace because: a) I'm an adult male, b) I'm happily married and c) I have no reason to promote myself.

    With that being said, this is a 'one apple spoils the bunch' thing. A couple of shitty incidences and the over-sensitives are up in arms.
     
  9. LukesBoxHero

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    This topic is funny because I just re-joined facebook literally this morning.

    I quit orginally because people would try to talk to me and I just wouldn't respond. It wasn't a priority. Then one of my close friends actually got really upset with me beacuse instead of calling or texting me he tried to tell me something important through a facebook message and I never got it in time. That's when I called it quits about two years ago.

    Time has gone on and three or four next-morning girls have said "Why don't you have a facebook?" and no answer seems to suffice. It doesn't help that there is a fake facebook in my name (added ridiculous middle name - Gunther), and when people see this I usually laugh it off. I just figure at my age I'll just re-join and use it as little as possible.

    I still agree with most people who quit it and think it's all BS. I'll be lucky to check it twice a week.
     
  10. slippingaway

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    I met my wife on Match.com. I had just moved to Ft Worth from Wisconsin and didn't know a single person in Texas. She had just graduated from college, and started a teaching job back in her hometown, and didn't know anybody that lived there who was worth being friends with. It worked for us.
     
  11. Super

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    I have never created a facebook, although I did go through the obligatory myspace craze in early high school. It is not because I am lacking friends..I would just rather spend my time doing something else. The whole idea of allowing something occupy your life that is nearly meaningless is unbelievable to me. Now I am not saying that people who have a facebook have nothing better to do, it is just the individuals who take it as a hobby. I suppose I should just make an account instead of judging people. Oh well.