I have a ladyfriend. This ladyfriend is a lovely young black woman of twenty two years of age. Recently she came to me, in great distress, to tell of the pain and woe she was suffering unlike anything she had ever felt before. Yes ladies and gents, my ladyfriend had suffered her first sunburn. Her naturally dark skin and dutiful use of sunscreen had protected her lo these long years, but finally she had experienced what we crackers had been using as an excuse to five-star our siblings in the middle of the back every year at the beach for years. It was simultaneously pitiful and adorable to listen to myriad ways she found to express, "this really hurts!" as well as the tone she took when describing the unique suffering that was a sunburn, as if my Irish ass had no experience with the matter (It even hurts to shower! For serious!). Poor kid, if she sunbathed naked I would have spanked her just for the fun of it. Focus: When have you, or someone you know, been really late to the party? Learn to ride a bike at 28? Lose your virginity at 44?