Sleep Oddities

I do strange things while asleep or napping. If having a dream where i'm doing something such as running or jumping people have witnessed me get air off the couch. When sleeping with no blankets on i have woken up in the morning wrapped in my blanket no matter where it was when i went to sleep and on other occasions a towel from the floor, once even a set of trackpants.

I've been busted on numerous occasion talking in my sleep, on one such time my brother recorded me singing the whole theme song of speed racer word for word. Quite amazing considering i never even knew the thing to start with.

Some of this may have something to do with the fact that i have sleep apnea but things like this have happened since i was a little fella.

Focus: What oddities do you engage in during sleep? Sleepwalk? Sleep-drink? sleep-post on TiB? Or just regularly shit yourself?

 

I can never manage to keep all the blankets on me, I'll wake up in the morning and only have the comforter on me while the other blankets are in a ball at the foot of the bed. I've also been told I moan and make weird sounds from time to time. I have a friend who is guaranteed to wake up cuddling with the person next to him. No matter who the unlucky person sleeping next to him is, they will wake up with his big meaty arm around them.

Another friend once yelled "Evaluate the Pants!" in his sleep. Along those lines, my youngest brother started kicking and thrashing in his bed one night yelling "Scorpions!!" and thinking he had scorpions in his bed. It took a little while to calm him down (and stop laughing) after that one.

 

Apparently I'll answer my phone and engage in conversation while asleep. A few nights past, I supposedly answered when the girlfriend called, told her I was having dinner, and when she asked what I was having, I replied "Macaroni and soap."

Her: "Ah. You must be asleep."
Me: "Where?"

Hey, I didn't say it was intelligent conversation.

 

It's pretty normal for me to wake up with extra covers on. I've been told once or twice that I talk philosophy in my sleep. I've sent text messages that I don't remember sending. Pretty tame, which I guess is a good thing.

 

- I (apparently) roll over by popping almost my entire body in the air and spinning before I come back down. The downside is that when I do this, I wake up the person next to me. The upside (according to my girlfriend) is that I never tug the blankets off of her because it happens so quick that they don't cling to me.

- I'm known to have vivid dreams of giant spiders on my pillow. So vivid, that I'll wake up, hurl myself out of the bed to flip on the lights, and then spend a short time searching the room before I'm sure it wasn't real.

- I'll talk in my sleep. Most of the time it's like the above "Evaluate the pants!" line, nonsense that provides entertainment for whoever is conscious and within earshot.

- On the brink of sleep, I sometimes experience partial or full-body convulsions. I think it's because I catch myself falling asleep and quickly wake back up (I'm not sure why I do this since I'm in the bed to fucking sleep anyway).

 

I've woken up with my phone in my hand. Further inspection will show I've been texting and I can't spell at all when I am unconscious. I keep my phone locked and on silent, yet still reply to incoming activity in my sleep.

 

I'm a pretty normal sleeper as far as I know, besides the normal flipping over to lay on my other side every now and then during the night. That is I'm normal when full on sleeping through the night.

Whenever I lay down on my bed to take a brief nap in the afternoon or early evening, I almost always end up drooling all over myself.

 

I had a roommate who sleepwalked and sleeptalked.

One incident stuck out in my mind:

I was getting ready for an early class, and he mumbled, "I killed like, 50 less than a company of them. Fucking Jews" I was always a little worried after that.

Occasionally I sleepwalked, the last major incident was my freshman year, when my roommate walked into the room at 3am I jumped out of bed and started twirling around the room, and started banging on his alarm clock.

I then walked over to my bed, and sat on the edge swinging my legs back and forth, then went back to bed.

The worst part was I knew what I was doing as I was doing it, I just couldn't stop myself.

 

My brother once took a picture of me sleeping with my head being propped up by my arm. As if I were in the fucking African savanna trying to keep bugs out of my ears as I slept. My brother also tells me that whenever he has a conversation with me while I'm asleep, I curse like Richard Pryor with a severe case of Tourettes. Such as Motherfucking Jesus dicksniffing fucknugget. Really.

Oh, and for the entirety of my teenage youth, I drooled. A lot. As in, the only reason why people knew those white stains on my blankets was drool was because they were always located next to my face. You can keep your nocturnal bukakke jokes to yourself.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I'll actually shake myself awake. You know that feeling you get when you miscount steps and there's one less step than you thought? Then you take that step and feel every bone in your body get jarred? That's what wakes me up. I'll open my eyes to see my limbs flying in random directions. I'm glad I'm single, otherwise I'd be arrested for domestic violence.

 

I think I'll try tonight. I will enlist someone to text me late. I am curious how I know that my silent phone is going off..I keep it in my nightstand, so the light doesn't disturb me.

 

My replies aren't confusing, they are what I'd respond were I awake. They are riddled with typos though. I never have felt the need to "explain" them as anything. I receive late texts a couple of times a week. The times vary between 11p.m. and 4 a.m.

The ones I initiate are generally in line with a conversation that has been held the day before. My friends are accustomed to my thought processes, I come back to subjects and play devil's advocate to them often.

 

I do this most times I fall asleep as well, it kind of looks like I'm twitching. I was camping once and laid down to have a nap, did the twitching thing and just as I was falling into sleep one of my friends woke me up asking if I was alright. I also talk in my sleep occasionally, it's usually nothing amazing - my brother is awesome for that. We used to share a room in the basement when we were young and he would wake me up when he was talking. Every now and then, I would see what I could make him say and I've managed to goad him into getting pretty angry in his sleep.

I play a sport called Underwater Hockey and every two years the World championships are held. It's a two week event where you basically play once or twice a day against other teams - the results are exhausting and it was rare that we (at age of 17-18) managed to stay up past 9 pm. The teams usually stick together and hang out for those two weeks, going off to events around town or just sightseeing. One day we all opted to stay in a watch a movie, which to no-ones surprise, put most of us to sleep. About thirty minutes into the epic nap I was having I, allegedly, stood up on the hide-a-bed, started marching in a tight circle yelling "HEEEEY BUDDY BUDDY BUDDY BUDDY!" for a solid two minutes. I then sat down on the bed, looked around with my eyes closed and laid down and went back to sleep.

 

I mentioned in another thread that I do this, too.

This happens to me too, but I'm pretty sure the convulsion is because I have a dream about falling or stumbling very soon after I go to sleep. I can't say that's the case every time, because I don't always remember it. Usually it is something simple like dreaming I walked off a curb without realizing it is there or missed a step on the staircase.

My ex-husband, when we were first married, used to have dreams that he was being attacked by demons and he would violently flail his arms and yell and then finally cast them out in Jesus name (we were Christians). He also talked nonsense in his sleep sometimes. Over the years it happened less and less, kind of like with my spider dreams. I don't know if it has something to do with getting older.

My dad, if he had been drinking heavily before going to sleep, used to do some off the wall stuff. The most notable one was the time he came down the stairs, pulled down his pants, and sat in a chair - apparently thinking it was the toilet. Fortunately my mom got to him quickly before the chair could be ruined. Also fortunately this all happened on the periphery of my vision, so I didn't see anything that would scar me for life.

 

Mad Libs!

 

Maybe that's why Dave Mustaine almost lost the ability to play guitar...

Focus: Nothing too scary over here. Sometimes I'll have a dream where a massive spider is lowering itself towards my face from the ceiling and I'll wake up, leap out of bed and turn the lights on, before feeling stupid and going back to sleep.

The most amusing instance of sleep oddities occured when I was younger, dreaming I was being beaten up by 3 shadow-figures. My Dad was awoken by my shouts and walked into my room to hear me screaming Vinnie Jones style; "COME ON THEN, YOU FUCKING CUNTS! YOU FUCKING CUNTS! FUCK OFF!"

That was kinda embarrassing to be woken up to. "Hey Son, just wondering why you're calling somebody a cunt."

 

I think I have done most of the things mentioned besides vivid dreams.

Sleep talking and my brother says I said "Anybody want Salmonella?" Other people say I just mumble and mutter stuff.

I slept walked only a couple times and one of the times I walked all the way upstairs, went into the pantry and started peeing in the garbage. I then answered the house phone (didn't ring) and told my brother it was for him and went back to bed.

I occasionally sleep on my arm and awaken to it being completely numb and once I woke up with it on my face. Was kinda freaky I thought it was someone else. No handjobs though.

I drool like a mother fucker.

I always wake up with fitted sheets ripped off.

I have also went to bed several times with no blanket and then woke up on the couch with one.