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She said penis! *giggles*

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by JDTheHero, Mar 31, 2010.

  1. JDTheHero

    JDTheHero
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    Change the title if you need, but the new health are reform in the States is all sorts of fucked up

    <a class="postlink" href="http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/03/31/abstinence.education/index.html?hpt=T2" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/03/31/ab ... tml?hpt=T2</a>

    Pg. 618 of the bill states that to receive funding, one must be willing to teach abstinence only education! $50 million in funding over five years so Johnny can say to Sally, we can fuck, but not with condoms, cuz they'll give you gangrene on your dick!

    Focus: How was your sex ed experience in school? Were you the kid everyone looked at when she was talking about masturbating? Giggle at the word penis? Get a boner while the 24 year old buxom blonde bombshell girl was teaching you? Discuss?
     
  2. Merle

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    Back in 8th grade a guy I knew tried to embarrass the teacher anyway he could. Two notable instances were him asking "if two are having butt sex and the person farts can the penis explode?" and getting her to accidentally spell out swear words while writing the letters to hangman that were incorrect.

    As for me I once cracked up when a priest was lecturing my CCD class on the catholic priest molestation scandal. I was fine up until he said the word puberty. It was not so much the word but how he pronounced it. He said poop-erty. I did not want to laugh at a priest so I tried to stifle the laughter and ended up grunting very loudly. Everyone started laughing at what the priest that was him, in reality it was me, and we all got yelled at and had an extra assignment to do.

    edit: spelling
     
  3. c_norris

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    I'll always remember the one kid who asked if vaginas can swallow penises whole.

    Yes, Ronnie, yes they can.
     
  4. ghettoastronaut

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    I went to a Catholic school and was out of class one day per week because I was in the gifted program. I had maybe two or three classes on sex ed from grades five through eight.

    Had a few more lectures in grade nine which were a total repeat of the classes I had in science a few weeks before on reproduction. No information on contraception, condoms, birth control, STDs, pregnancy, so forth. The funny thing is, msot of the time when I have a lecture on STDs (usually in a therapeutics course) now that I'm in university, I sleep in.
     
  5. Samr

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    Went to a small, private "religious-based" school. Our sex-ed was inclusive of a firm "don't do it." That worked about as well as you might expect.
     
  6. jennitalia

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    I will never forget the kid who asked if condoms could go in the dishwasher and be reused.
     
  7. Kubla Kahn

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    In elementary school the gym teacher had to take all the guys aside and give us a "man to man" talk about what will be happening to out bodies in a few short years. Josh, the half ghetto want to be black kid, was laughing uncontrollably at every mention of penis. He got kicked out of the room.

    In high school sex ed we had one of the abstinence only zealots come in to give us the usual. Even as 14 year olds the fanaticism in the woman's voice let us know she was full of shit. I don't think a single person in the class, whether they signed their abstinence promise card or not, saved themselves for marriage. Abstinence only, now I guess they call it abstinence focused (way to go spin meisters), is way to impracticable and just asking for unwanted pregnancy.

    It wasn't until college where they started showing medical videos of women squirting. For the win.
     
  8. no use for a name

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    Ninth grade sex ed in a Catholic high school involved watching a video of a child birth and a video of an abortion. Fucking terrible...the abortion put the birth to shame.

    On the first day of the sex ed semester the teacher asked us the things we wanted to learn about that semester, and she wrote them on the board. My buddy, who was the eternal "cut-up", said he wanted to learn about "hermes" (hermaphrodites). For whatever reason I just completely lost it, but it was one of those things where I was laughing hysterically, but trying to contain the laughter at the same time. This in turn caused two of my buddies to start laughing out of control, all while trying to contain it, which just made me laugh even harder, and so on and so forth.

    We had to spend that bell in the library for the next week or so, until we could prove we were mature enough to handle sex ed. Which makes no sense, because the library was an awesome hang out spot to goof off or sleep on the comfy couches. Never could understand why certain teachers considered that a punishment.
     
  9. Denver

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    I remember there was some segment where we could ask questions anonymously on slips of paper. I thought I was particularly clever writing down "Is cooties an STD?" Needless to say, that isn't very funny in the first place, and it became even less so when the teacher acted like it was a serious question and went on explaining about real STDs and how they can't be contracted by regular touching like cooties can be. And that cootie(s?) shots are ineffective at protecting against real STDs.
     
  10. Creelmania

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    Hearing all these abstinence only talks really surprises me. I had maybe 2 hours of classtime in grade 7 devoted mainly to the changes we were going through in puberty. I think everyone in the class laughed whenever the lady said penis or vagina. There was also some basic sex-ed talk at the end, just saying condoms are always a must and whatnot.

    Then in grade 9 we had a sex ed class informing us on safe sex. The teacher repeatedly said "The only 100% form of birth control is abstinence" but she was also extremely informative on contraceptives. I think her recommendation was a condom and spermicidal lube.

    The anonymous questions we handed in and she answered at the end were the highlight of that class.

    "'Can jaking off too much cause permanent damage?' I'm going to assuming the person meant jacking off, or male masturbation; and no, it won't cause any damage."

    At this point I think all the guys were laughing. Not only at the question/answer, but about one of us being stupid enough to not know how to spell 'jacking off'.
     
  11. Maltob14

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    In grade 9 PDR we had a sex talk one day and my teacher brings up the rumour of "masturbating can cause blindness" came up. My buddy and I were sitting in the back just laughing at some of the shit that came up and how stupid it was. When he heard that question he cuts everyone off, looks at the kid and goes "thats bullshit, I beat it like crazy and I've got 20/20 vision." The teacher, who lived across the street from this guy, well she turned red and had to go sit down for a while.
     
  12. Arctic_Scrap

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    It wasn't me, but a friend of mine took the liberty of answering this question that a girl asked while the talk was on STDs and how and where you get them. It was something along the lines of "How can you get an STD in your eye?" and my friend blurts out, "Haven't you ever watched a porno before? It's from the cumshot."
     
  13. Viking33

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    7th grade and my English teacher (a 35 year old blonde bombshell) tells us that any questions we may have about the puberty changes we were going through were welcome in her class for proper, honest answering. The usual questions came around (will condoms really work? Is sex wrong? Etc.) when I popped my hand up and asked a question that had been bothering me since recess that day...

    "If your wife's pregnant and you have sex with her, can you poke the baby?"

    Cue the class burting out in laughter and several of the other boys (including me) nearly in tears, the Q&A session ended early with me serving a 30 minute detention after class for "acting inappropriately at a serious time". Whatever, I was being serious.
     
  14. Benzilla

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    I went to a public school in New York but I'm still confused about what kind of Sex Ed. I got. There was one condom demonstration. One person from Planned Parenthood put one condom on a wooden dildo once. The answer the rest of the time was "Abstinence is the only way to make sure you never get anyone pregnant/get an STD/get AIDS."

    On a related note, I recently started watching 16 and Pregnant. At first, it was just because I've never seen a show with more lulz per minute but then my inner academic kicked in and I started noticing that a lot of the girls featured on the show live in places were abstinence-only sex ed. is prevalent. I'm surprised no lobbying groups are making a big deal about that.
     
  15. sprockett

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    In grade eight, our sex-ed teacher decided to let a bunch of videos from the Discovery channel (or something similar) do the teaching for her. Key things in my mind stick out in the many hours of VHS: the fact that the beginning was soft core porn showing people 'making love', another part where the camera was inside the penis & showed semen 'rushing' towards the camera, and the last video was an actual birth. With a close up of the vagina as the baby was being delivered. I think that's all we talked about for months, it doesn't seem crazy now, but when you are 12-13 that shit is a big deal.
    None of the girls wanted to have sex after seeing how a baby is delivered, and all the guys looked ill; I guess it was effective for awhile.
     
  16. Noland

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    I was in a private high school in the late 80s when people were just starting to hit the panic button about AIDS, so we had it hammered into our heads that condoms were critically important things. And rightfully so.

    But it wasn't until I was in college that I saw, during a safe sex lecture in the dorm, a nurse pour a full gallon of water into a condom without it breaking.
     
  17. ecc1290

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    In 8th grade we all had to give a Powerpoint presentation on an STD. My friend had to do his on herpes. He's projecting slide after slide on the board, and each one had two or three bullet points in large text which he read quickly then moved on to the next slide. However, the fourth or fifth slide had several densely packed notes on the left, and on the right was a massive close-up of a guy holding his dick. The dick was hairy, covered in cold sores, and had fluid coming out the tip. So we're all staring at this massive and disgusting image that's being projected in front of us, and at this point he starts reading slower than he had been previously. The teacher was none the wiser to my friend's malicious intent because he kept a calm voice and facial expression. That was the funny thing about sex ed, you absolutely couldn't get in trouble for pretty much anything you said or did as long as the teacher didn't think you were trying to be a smart ass. A few people started stifling laughs, and the squeamish kids started shifting in their seat. This went on for about a minute while the teacher idly filled out the grading rubric.
     
  18. Virty

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    My sex education was very basic, only occurred in High School. Which honestly is the right idea. You should be teaching this stuff right as the kids are starting to try to be "sexual". The soccer coach taught it, he was actually my neighbor really nice guy. Seriously I had the bejeezus scared out of me.

    Pretty much we would have tests every couple of weeks. They covered pretty much everything, female anatomy, male anatomy. Pretty much all of the standard stuff I would imagine you could go over. Notice that I didn't mention something? STD's, Pregnancies, perhaps?

    My awesome neighbor pretty much showed us visual proof of pretty much every common STD out there. Being the ignorant young man I was. I saw all of these pictures of penises and vaginas, with terrible sores, all red. Seriously, redder than the Devil's dick. He basically went to google and typed in nasty sexually transmitted diseases, and hit images.

    I really didn't need a reason to wrap it up after that. I had all the reasons I needed. But I think he mentioned some stuff about not getting chicks pregnant, or something.
     
  19. jrussellmikkelsen

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    Mothers, raise your daughters in Colorado!

    There was a lot of sex ed in my life. My parents taught me where babies come from when I started first grade. My school first taught us about puberty in 3rd grade, I think. Then we had a more comprehensive series of classes on menstruation and methods of protection and all that good stuff in 6th grade. Then we had a semester of social studies in 8th grade. Then another semester of it is required in high school.

    High school was the best. There was the day the students were asked to give every single slang word for vagina and penis we could think of. I think we thought of about 50 for each and the teacher said she was disappointed in us for missing so many. There was the day a completely white cop came in to talk about who knows what. He was memorable because he spoke entirely in ebonics and explained that he was just a very light-skinned black man. That was a confusing day.

    The best day, of course, was when three transvetites came to talk to the class. Two were just cross-dressers (one happily married). But one of them was on hormones, had no visible adams apple (he explained that he had surgery to shave it to a more feminine shape) and had a sex-change operation scheduled for the summer. He already looked and sounded like a woman, a bit tall though. And when someone asked, he told us that he "tucked."

    Good times.
     
  20. Decatur Dave

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    Sex ed was probably the only A I got in eighth grade. NY state public education rocked, none of that abstinence only shit.

    During the "ask anything" segment of the class, I still remember a girl asking "if an old man ejaculates in a hot tub while sitting next to me, could I get pregnant?" Blonds apparently do have more fun.