Sex Techniques

Girls: we all want to try anal at some point. Get drunk grab some KY and let us go for the five hole, we will appreciate it forever.

 

Just because I'm super wet, it doesn't mean that I came. Don't tell me that you think I came, I fucking know when it happens and it definitely didn't just happen. I can't help that I get really wet, even if it's not that good, so don't go thinking you are some sex god.

Now that that's out of the way... I think the most magical thing I have ever experienced was the first time I got my tits sucked. As cocky and annoying as he was, that boy knew his way around a pair of boobs. It was some awesome combination of sucking/nibbling and them blowing on them. Even when I try to explain that this is what I want to other guys, it's never been the same. It seems like such a simple concept but no dice. I think I'll be calling that boy this summer.

 

Fixed that.

Focus: Hand jobs - this better not be the extent of your foreplay abilities. It reminds me of junior high and I'm much better at it than you.

Me watching you blow me for 10 minutes is awesome. Watching you jerk me off for 10 minutes is not.

Also, from my experience, the ladies love when you pay attention to their nips. I was drunk once and fucked around with a chicks nipples for a loooooooong time while I tried to will my dick into boner mode. She eventually threw me off of her, got on top and jammed my blimpie in her. She came the second my dick touched her vagina. She then kinda collapsed on top of me and said "thank you thank you thank you" over and over. I learned something special that day.

Then she returned to being a normal chick and was all self conscious and embarrassed about her premature mishap.

Edit: Typed this before I saw jennitalia's post. PM me for my phone number hon.

 

I posted the story here: http://www.theidiotboard.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?f=1&p=45495#p45495

Girls, some guys are okay with you plugging fingers in the manhole. Others not so much. Find out beforehand so it's not a surprise for your man. The first time it happened to me, I wasn't sure whether to think "wow, that was cool" or go start crying in the bathroom.

Oh, and to further some of the points mentioned earlier in regard to giving boa constrictor hand jobs; if you're giving me a rub n' tug on the outside of my boxers, you're teasing. NOT eying my dick like an anaconda sizing up a zebra. Dick rug burn from my boxers is not sexy any way you play it. Either be gentle or get it in you, it's not a cat scratching post.

 

Ok , fair enough .... a well timed "Yes , right there" or "Keep doing that" could work wonders.


Ladies , when you are pleasuring your man orally ... give the spot on the underside of his cock , where the shaft and the head meet ( the Frenulum ) a good lick ... it feels damn good.

 

Don't ask me if I came.

If it wasn't obvious to you, then I probably didn't. You're either asking for validation or because you're confused, both of which are not sexy. If you can't answer that question for yourself, the solution is to try again until you're certain, not ask for a certificate of verification.

Of course, if you're just asking out of obligation, why bother asking at all? I'm trying to sleep and now you're pestering me with questions.

 

I don't know about other dudes, but playing with my balls really does nothing for me. In fact it just makes me afraid that you might slip and harm or scratch my balls in some way. Just let them dangle. Put that other hand on my dick too while you blow me for some added fun instead. My current fuck buddy did this to me a few times until I told her not to bother. She said she heard guys liked it. It seems like they do this in every porno too. Waste of time and a hand. Hell use that other hand to play with your tits instead. At least that is fun for you and fun for me to watch.

 

Guys only ask so we know when not to try as hard next time.

 

A-fucking-men! If you didn't get me off, I can guarantee that I did it myself. No, I wasn't rubbing my clit cause I thought you would like to see that, I did it because your dick wasn't doing the job.

Another thing... there are very few nerve endings right at our hole. Don't try to fuck me with your tongue (unless you're doing magic on my clit with your nose). Find the little button and touch it. Lick it. Slap it with your dick. Rub it. Nibble it. When I say "DON'T STOP" for the love of God, don't fucking stop or switch it up.

Ask before you try to stick anything in my ass. Seriously, you'd probably have a coronary if I stuck something in yours without asking.

Don't neglect my nipples. Oh, and using your teeth is sometimes a good thing. If I ask for it, I want it.

 

Now you see, this is definitely a case of different strokes for different folks. My wife has grabbed me by my hard on and lead me to a place in the house where she wanted it on several occasions, and it never fails to drive me wild.

I had a prostitute play with my peehole with her tongue once while getting a blow job and to me it felt great. I also had one use just a little teeth and to this day it was the best blow job I ever had. But in both cases she was a pro, so ladies you'll need a lot of practice to pull it off. In both cases the technique was very subtle.

 

This cliborus button you speak of: I presume it can be found on or around your sehx fegina?

 

Gentlemen,
if she is grabbing your hair to push your head down, pushing her hips up and making you wear that pussy like a mask, she wants a firmer touch. If you can't tongue stab it any harder, pull the hood of the clit back for more direct contact. On the flip side, if she has her palms flat on your hairline/upper forehead, and is grinding her ass down into the bed, you're going too hard, ease it up.
If she says 'don't stop' then for the love of God, DON'T STOP!

Ladies,
don't assume I like it exactly the same way you do. Just because you have your own set of equipment doesn't mean you shouldn't explore mine like it's brand new.

 

I'm going to excuse myself and jerk off into a sock.

Anyway, I've been told I'm good with my hands (plural), so here's a couple of tips. Use a "come hither" motion with your fingers. Some girls like this rough, some don't. Feel around for something slightly softer than the rest of her. It's toward the front of her body. Don't be a gyno. Congratulations, you've found the mythical g-spot.

I like using a circular motion with varying degrees of pressure. Throw in either oral on her clit or use your fingers. I tend to get better g-spot manipulation if I use my fingers on her clit instead. If she doesn't start calling you Jesus, you're doing it wrong.

I can't stress this enough. Every girl is different, so adjust if needed.

Edit: Also, it's amazing to me that the girls I've been have bitched about prior guys they've been with (It's all I can do to not shrinkwrap my dick when this happens.) who didn't know how to read how a girl's body responds. If she starts moaning, grinding against you, etc. etc. KEEP FUCKING DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING. A girl's body is just like a guy's. Be smart about switching positions and acts.

 

I learned this the hard way. This was several years ago with my very first girlfriend. We were doing the deed and she started getting close at which point I had an idea. I would get her really close and then stop. Then do it again. I figured after two or three times she would get so crazy so that when I finally didn't stop the 4th or 5th time, she would have the most mind blowing orgasm ever. Didn't really work out that way. She got really close and I suddenly stopped. She flipped the fuck out. She yelled "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING." She came off the the high point, got off my dick and just hit me in the chest several times while yelling at me. Fuck session over. She was furious at me for so long. I was pretty surprised and decided from then on to never cut a girl off when she is close.

 

This, a million times over. Certain women get this inflated sense of pride about their "superior" pussy eating skills, and it'll suck ignorant ladies in every single time. What actually happens is this: She'll go down....but only to enthusiastically fuck in a way that she herself prefers to be fucked. It may not do anything for you, but she's not paying attention. You'd better be, though, because anything less than a complete reenactment upon reciprocation will net you pissy sighs and testy directions from the vicinity of the headboard.

Also (and I'm considering the possibility that this may just be my experience), trim your pubes. I've found that ladies-who-love-ladies only come in two varieties--bald or full bush. I'm not wild about bald (stubble) but full bush around the clit area is difficult to tolerate. I don't have any visual preference like men do, it's simply a matter of the lengthy hairs tickling the inside of my nostrils and provoking a sneeze before I have time to pull away. I can close my mouth and sneeze, but then it truly sounds like I'm gagging and that ruins the mood for everyone.

For dudes: Trim your fingernails/hangnails. Just because you can't see a small hangnail doesn't mean that my sweet ladyflower won't feel it. The best fingering sessions come from fingers that feel soft, like the penis--you know, no jagged edges to ruin the illusion. Well, callouses are cool but as long as they're hardened. Also, unless you have baby hands, you can touch clit and stuff vagina with the same hand. Learn how, and reap the rewards.

 

In a similar vein that people have different preferences ---- I know one poster mentioned that the balls do nothing for him ---- but for me, it is fucking amazing ---- licking, sucking, stroking, massaging ----- feels amazing on my balls.

In fact, add to my own preference with what I've seen in porn, and I'd say it's safe to assume extensive ball-attention is the norm, not the exception to the rule.


Also---- call me crazy, but isn't there some basic oral etiquette, in that, if someone goes down on you, or vice versa, it's at least common courtesy to return the favor? I'm amazed sometimes at girls who don't get this --- girls who have blown me before, usually, too. You ask me to go down on you, I'll be happy too ---- but at least blow me for 5 minutes afterward.

To date, I have never had a girl who can score above a 3 on a 10 point scale for hand jobs. I don't have unrealistic expectations, either. The two trickiest parts are 1. pressure ---- experiment but we don't want a vice-grip nor a wet-fish grip and 2. a basic misunderstanding where the most sensitive part/ never endings of the penis are. Granted, I'm 22 and have been fucking college girls but honestly --- the underside a little south of where head meets shaft is the sweet spot. Don't expect me to get off when you are vigorously stroking the base and lower shaft of the penis.

 

I completely agree, but this brings me onto another issue that I want input on. My friends and I have discussed and debated this for a while now. When hooking up with a girl that I don't know well (one night stand, friends of friends, etc) I will almost always get a blowjob. It's a natural progression on the way from making out all the way up to sex, so it's understandable. Now I will usually reciprocate by going down on her (or will make the move before she goes down on me), but a lot of my buddies won't eat a girl out unless they know the girl well. So, the guy that just got head from this random girl that he picked up at the bar, now has a problem reciprocating because she is a stranger. Is that hypocritical or is there a real cause for concern, based on the physical female anatomy and by eating her out you put yourself at greater risk at contracting, than she does by blowing you?

 

IAmWillIAm's Guide to Eating Pussy:

Eating pussy isn't just about the pussy, it's a full body experience. I usually start off with plain ol' kissing, then move my way on to the neck and collar area. A minute there and its on to the nips-- I've found that a circular motion followed by some light nibbling drives the ladies wild. Try to hit up as many of the erogenous zones as possible: neck, breasts, inner thigh, and the back of the knees with nibbling and kissing. Finally when she's good and wet, take a nice big lick from the the top of the taint to past her clit. Do that a few times, then finally move in on the clit, and keep licking until your jaw goes numb. Then keep going. Pick a motion and stick with it, but vary the motion between pussy-eating sessions. EX: I'll go with a circular motion one night, side to side another, and up and down another.

That's my technique, ladies, if you have any advice, please let me know.