Screw you and your stupid team!

If you get to the point where you're physically assaulting somebody at a sporting event, whether it be attacking a girl outside of Fenway or whipping batteries at J.D. Drew, something has gone terribly wrong. By all means, be as ridiculous as you want on your own time, but the standards of non-asshole society do not evaporate because your team lost, or won, or tied.

It's funny, I hear a lot of people hate on sports, as, "a bunch of men running around to catch a ball", which does sound truly ridiculous. Of course, anything sounds ridiculous when you boil it down to its core elements without any sort of context. Sports afford viewers the rare opportunity to witness people in peak physical condition (and make no mistake, athletes are in the same strata of physical talent as professional dancers or singers) do things that nobody else in the world can do. Add in a continuing storyline of non-scripted drama and regional competitiveness and I don't understand how anybody could miss the appeal. It's like ballet + reality television + the Olympics.

AND people can do it on their own, at a lower level. When was the last time you had a pick up game of Swan Lake?

 

I will say this, I find it hilarious how glorified playing baseball/basketball/football is and how demonized something like LARPing is, they're both an act of physical competition with a completely random set of rules and goals.

I suppose the people who LARP don't really help the perception.

And for the record, I'm not some nerdy sports hater, I played football for eight years among other sports.

 

Yeah, VT has a lame set of both Yankees and Red Sox fans, they're just in such close proximity that they always end up arguing publicly.

I'm with Nom, anyone that gets physical at or because of a sporting event is retarded. I'm consistently amazed when I hear of parents at little league games beating the piss out of each other. Really!? Your little Timmy shouldn't have been walked because of little Johnny's lack of skill? So you whoop his dads ass, or better yet, you hit the kid. What. The. Fuck.

I guess I get the sense of belonging to a group, but referring to a teams chance at winning or standing as, "we're going all the way this year," as if you're a member of the team baffles me also. Especially the people that just got into the sport, and live no where near "their" team.

 

The answer is simple: Sports are a regulated game that requires contant practice just to be average at, meanwhile LARPing is a bunch of grown (mostly) virgin adults playing Cops 'n' Robbers, "pretending" their arm is wounded when they are hit while dressing up in ridiculously cumbersome costumes that restrict their movement. They use plastic and foam "weapons" to "kill" each other.

That's little kid shit. Maybe I just never got it, but let's face the facts: Not everyone can do sports, but ANY idiot can play in that silly LARP crap. Most people choose not to because they don't want to be made fun of for the rest of their lives.

And collectively, Yankees fans are the biggest assholes. It's a scientific fact they hold 80% of the world's known supply of Smug.

 

But like sports, practice and athleticism make you better at the 'combat' in LARPing. And anyone can play baseball or any other sport, they just might suck at it.

Don't get me wrong, baseball and other mainstream sports are a better indicator of athleticism and should be regarded as such, I just find the HUGE difference in perception a little weird.

To be clear though, I'm not talking about LARPs with lightning bolts and that shit, just fake weapons.

 

See? They're PUSSIES. Fake weapons and shit. You want to know if you hit somebody in the arm? That's what blood is for!

 

You know how to find the biggest asshole in your immediate area? Scream O---H and see who answers I----O. Its like vegans, they'll let you know sooner than later.
I know what you're saying,,,, "What kind of asshole screams O-H" in a crowded bar",,, In which I would answer...... "Ohio State fans that's who" I'm just the jackass who is having fun at their expense. And if you don't think that this happens at everyday places in the midwest, you're out of your fucking mind.

Now don't get me wrong, I sorta get it. Why wouldn't you root for the Buckeyes when your other options were the Cleveland Indians, Cinncinati Reds (who are actually gonna win the central this year), or the Caveliers and Browns?
Ohio State is the only consistent source of winning that someone from Ohio is exposed to.

But here is the thing..... I can tolerate all of those people... but what makes me want to punch people is all those assholes who (previous posters have mentioned this) are band wagon jumpers. Really? You're a Yankees fan? Who hits 6th for them?

Spot on.
My favorite game is to try to guess why they like the Yankees? 1) They lived in NY (never NYC proper, some place like Schenectady, or Albany)for a couple years when they were in grade school(which makes them even more of a cunt because you'll never find Met fan who lived in Buffalo for two years when they were 9 years old) 2)They had an uncle who lived in Besonhurst, and he was their favorite 3) Its who their Dad liked. (which makes it bred into their DNA that they're an asshole)
And I don't mean to just single out Yankee fans. Every motherfucker who bought a Red Sox hat after 2004 is a jack off. I can't believe we let these people infiltrate our everyday lives without calling them out on their bullshit. Now, I'm not saying that you can't be a Yankee or Philly, or Cubs, or Red Sock fan if you don't live in the geographic vicinity,,,, I'm just saying that if I've seen you around for while and then all of a sudden after the Giants win the World Series and your sporting a Kung Fu Panda tattoo, and a fresh new hat with the sticker on it..... You should be called what you truly are. A cunt.
What they're doing is tantamount to twilight fans. We sort of give them a pass because they're 12 years old girls, and they don't understand that they're retarded...... But grown adults should know better. Am I being a little harsh? Answer this question: If you had a good buddy, one that you've known for the better part of their life, and they all of a sudden he starting wearing cowboy hats, denim jeans, cowboy boots, going to country western bars, out there on the dance floor doing the electric slide, thinking that Pure Country is a great movie, and generally, all of a sudden like, becoming infatuated with this lifestyle...... You'd think he was fucking nuts right? Its no different.

My question for anyone that is a newly found Cub fan. Why? Why would you submit yourself to this? What are you, some sort of fucking sadist? I've been a Cubs fan (if you can call me that, I don't think anyone hates this team more than I do) since 1983. If there was one thing that I could change it would be to travel back in time and punch myself in my little 7 year old face.

And the OP is spot on. White Sox and Cubs fans do not mix. Which is why I hate John Cusak. No one in the history of living in Chicago has liked both the White Sox and the Cubs. Cannot be done. Pick a side fag.

 

And a quarter of the World Series titles since 1900.

I know I'm not helping perceptions.

 

Your username and display picture isn't helping you any either.

 

I find it odd/interesting that geographic location during childhood is taken to be a legitimate reason for team preference by default (and, to some, the only one), whereas choosing based on players, coaches, or family bonding experience is often seen as capricious or illegitimate.

 

Here's a better comparison: Playing pen & paper RPGs or MMORPGs vs. playing fantasy sports. A hardcore gamer might spend hours studying books, websites, messageboards, etc., trying to make their character as powerful as it can be. Someone who plays fantasy sports might spend hours studying magazines, websites, messageboards, etc., in an effort to draft the best team they can. Fundamentally, there's pretty much zero difference between the two, except if I say I play fantasy sports people nod without a second thought but if I say I play World of Warcraft I get put in the catagory of nerdy loser to avoid.

 

I had heard that all NASCAR fans are dumber-than-dirt redneck guys. This is not true. When I went to Texas Motor Speedway, I met not 1, but 2 NASCAR fans who both still had all of their teeth, used polysyllabic words and never heard of Waffle House. Granted, they were married, but what's between two women is their own business.

 

Clearly you have never tried explaining fantasy sports to a woman or someone over 45. They will look at you with an expression that I previously thought was reserved for public masturbators.

 

The worst in the world is probably the Glasgow Ranger/Glasgow Celtic rivalry. The Rangers have Protestant fans, The Celtic represent the Catholics. In Scotland. The fans have been known to throw DARTS into the opposing fans' bleachers (they keep them separated in the stdiums with a entrance gap) and they fucking HATE EACH OTHER to no end.

 

You completely missed the ball on this one. You were clearly referring to Italy soccer fans, especially when they are third or fourth generation American citizens. But eyyyyyy, they watch the sopranos and have an Italian sounding name. Buffon 4 prez.

Chicago White Sox: You all pretty much suck. You're either white trash, ghetto, or a combination of the two. You know nothing about baseball and embraced AJ Pierzynski's gayer than AIDS bleach blonde hair. Trying to explain situational baseball to you is like trying to teach an infant calculus. Rot in hell.

 

Steelers fans in Pittsburgh- Really nice people that enjoy having conversations about all things football.

Steelers fans everywhere else- They seem to believe Ben Rothlisberger should rape you for not being a fan of the steelers. Many have fake tans, and often pretend to have mafia connections. Most commonly found in welfare lines, or country lockups.

 

Ohio State fans are incredibly obnoxious. I mentioned this when I repped you, but it was a funny story. My wife and I are Purdue Alumni, and every year we go to a couple of football games (one with my parents, one with her parents). Well, we went to the Purdue/Ohio State game in 2009, when Purdue was 1-5 and Ohio State was ranked 7th in the country. The stadium was easily half-full with Ohio State fans who traveled to the game, so naturally there were those obnoxious "O-H!" "I-O!" chants going from the moment we got on campus.

When the game was decided, however, with about 2 minutes left, shit changed. Most Ohio State fans began running (literally running) for the exits, while the stadium started a loud "O-H!" "OH-NO!" chant. As we were leaving, Ohio State fans were still trying to talk shit, but they knew they were defeated. The "O-H!" "OH-NO!" chants continued to be incredibly loud around anyone wearing red.

The reality is that the best way to take the piss out of obnoxious fans is to be there when their team loses, or be more witty.

One jackass at US Cellular, in 2006, asked me "where the ivy was." I responded that the stadium wasn't decorated with Ivy, just "2005 World Series Champion" banners. He quickly shut the fuck up.

Bite me. Funny thing about sports: you can't tell me who to root for. You're the epitome of a sulking, pity-me Cubs fan. "I hate this team! I hate them! Hate Hate Hate them! Please shower me with pity! Oh, they signed Lou Pinella to manage? THIS IS THEIR YEAR! I won't hear otherwise! Fuck the White Sox! I love this team! Until they lose two games in a row, then I'll hate them again!"

I don't root for the Cubs because I love them. I don't. I root for the Cubs because my parents, my grandma, and all my brothers are Cubs fans, while I was the lone Sox fan in the family (I was a bit of a black sheep in that regard, what can I say). I became this when my dad took me to a White Sox game at the old Comiskey park when I was a kid, and I was at the perfect age for the experience to just stick with me (he had gotten free tickets from his job). However, bickering aside, I know that the Cubs winning would mean the world to my Grandma, who until this year traveled to spring training with my grandpa every year. She didn't this year because my grandpa just passed away. So yes, while I am a White Sox fan, I still root for the Cubs unless they are actually playing AGAINST the White Sox, in which case, fuck 'em. Not because I love the Cubs, but more because I know a lot of non-douchey Cubs fans that I'd like to see rewarded for their loyalty.

Oh, and Boston fans are far and away the worst. I'd rather sit in the middle of Wrigley wearing a White Sox jersey with "Cubs suck" written on the back than spend 5 minutes sitting in Fenway listening to them bitch about how the Yankees are buying titles (cognitive dissonance anyone?) all the other dumb-fuckery that comes from sitting amongst the Massholes.

One of my best friends is a Boston fan (he grew up in Indiana, so I have no fucking idea why) and becomes nearly intolerable when the subject of baseball comes up, so after we almost got into a fist fight because he wouldn't shut the fuck up about the Red Sox being the greatest franchise in the history of sports, I told him we shouldn't discuss baseball anymore. Oddly enough, he is a Red Sox fan and a Colts fan. I think that is more egregious than being a White Sox and a Cubs fan.

Oh, and I just saw Kratos' post. Yes, many White Sox fans are fucking idiots (i.e. anyone that runs on the field to attack a first base coach), but damned of Ozzie Guillen and AJ Pierzynski aren't incredibly entertaining. I'd hate them too if they weren't on the team I like.

 

It can't possibly be more awkward than trying to explain tabletop RPGs to someone.

Focus:

From another thread, but is relevent to the discussion:

 

Personally. around here I think Red Wings fans drive me crazy the most. We are exactly half way between Detroit and Toronto, so we have big mix of the fans (I myself am a Sabres fan, which there are none of) and Red Wings fans drive me NUTS. To look me dead in the eye and say with a straight face that Steve Yzerman is a better player than Wayne Gretzky....just...fuck. Are you off your goddamn meds or something? I know a lot of people think Gretzky is a pussy because he didn't fight and whutnot and Stevie Y is a great player but he is a pale shadow to Gretzky, just like practically every other hockey player that's ever existed. Gretzky is the best hockey player of all time. NOBODY is in second place.