I have a friend who is a lesbian. We'll call her V. V's most recent girlfriend was a real neanderthal, but she can't quit the crazy because I am pretty sure the caveman sex has her hypnotized. V was briefly "talking" to a new girl who was very sweet, endearing, affectionate, and just an all around cool person. But she won't date her because she is used to being the "boy" in the relationship and it makes her very uncomfortable to have someone attempt to woo her, pay for her, take care of her in any way. So instead of pursuing this new relationship, V has gone back to the old girlfriend. Cue another few weeks of crying at work, pissed off texting marathons in the hallway, lots of time spent in the bathroom. But hey, it's okay that the girlfriend is abusive, a pathological liar, and just generally a shitty person, because V gets to wear the strap-on. Focus: What is your role in your relationship(s)? Is this inflexible? Maybe you wear the pants during the day but slip on a dress at night. Alt Focus: Strap-ons.