Rave: Top Shot season premiere is right now. This revolver they're using just made my dick move. Rant: I got free passes to see 30 Minutes or Less tomorrow and can't find anyone to join me. Seriously? No one wants to see a FREE movie with me?
Rave/Rant/Unsure: Had the summer subleaser move out today. Became pretty good friends with her this summer and am actually missing her. Rave: My Naval Academy buddy I don't get to see much has spent the last three weekends hanging out in Chapel Hill with my and my friends. He's such a nice dude, and I've been trying to get him laid to no avail. Girls don't really dig asian guys I guess. Rave: Beach vacations are coming up...I have gotten no color on my skin this summer because of working in a lab. I am going to use this next week to tan for the entire year. Rereading that made me cringe, you know, because I have a penis and all. Rant: Lack of good books in my current possession. I think I'm going to have to make a library trip before hand. Any recommendations? I'll read pretty much anything aside from philosophy. Rave: Shaved my balls for the first time in a while out of sheer lazyness. Feels fucking fantastic and now I don't look like a werewolf when I'm naked.
The Hubs is up north at the Cabin with the boys and all alone, I decide to do a self-pedicure. Those Vietnamese women do NOT charge enough. I'm doing yoga up in here, fighting to get at that pinky toe. Men have it so good...no one cares what your feet look like in open-toed stilettos. I need Hooker or Pimptress to come hang out for a night so we can paint each others toes. And stuff. RAVE: having the house to myself for a hot minute. RANT: knock it off, JLO, you stink. Ok, Selena was ok, but blech. You suck at all the rest.
Rant: I am currently watching Crazy, Stupid Love illegally online and it is making me very very angry that I will (most likely) never sleep with Ryan Gosling. WHY, CRUEL WORLD???
Rave: ex-girlfriends not thinking that what they say will get back to you and the smackdown that occurs when it does. Fuck you bitch I'm free!
Rant: Stubbed my toe getting out of bed, HARD. Rave: Called out of work "sick" because of it. Rant: The girl wants to go to the Mohegan Sun for her bday. Im trying to save for our trip to Italy in September, so this is going to be a pain in the ass. But, she went all out for me for mine last year, so she deserves a great time.
Rant: If you're going to have pets, take them to the vet when their ear has been swollen shut for 3 fucking weeks.
Rave: I'm pretty good at pedicures, I have strong hands... Rant: Mr. P's turtle died yesterday. The day before, our building was being sprayed for bugs. When the bug guy came in, he asked to hold Shiza. Mr. P said sure and the guy grabbed Shiza with his gloves on, the ones drenched in poison. He realized quickly that this wasn't good and tried to wash Shiza immediatly, cleaned the whole tank. Within 24 hours his 3 year old turtle was dead. Bigger Rant: We don't have any fucking bugs in our apartment. It was a "precautionary" spraying. I feel so sad for Mr.P, he feels so guilty. He's had the little guy since he was hatched. We went for a late night bike ride to find a spot to rest Shiza in. There is a spot where the creek we ride on is dammed up by a beaver (we think it's a beaver). I took dried cattails, wove them together and made a badass raft. We rested Shiza on it and set it aflame and pushed it out. Probably the sweetest burial a turtle has ever had. Watching the flames die out, Mr. P remarked that if there is a next time, we need lighter fluid. We still have Beefalo left, if that turtle bites it too, we have a plan. Rave: We rode on to the resevoir and got a bit frisky. Rawr.
Rant: Drinking a bunch of wine with dinner and then switching to scotch on a Tuesday night is fucking stupid. I know this. Even if yesterday was my Monday after a vacation, and Monday's suck even when they're Tuesdays. Yeah, that was from a witty e-mail I sent last night. My head still hurts. Balls.
Rant: She couldn't make it that night because she got in a fight with her husband (not related to this). Now she's not sure she'll do something, as she feels the situation she'd be living would be too hard and she'd have to push for divorce. Rant: Out of options for now, single girls up for threeways aren't called ''unicorns'' for nothing.
RAVE: Moving to Richmond, Virginia on Friday for grad school. Wicked excited. RANT: Moving sucks. RAVE: The Boyfriend will be there for the weekend to help carry the heavy stuff. Yay, muscles!
Rave: I went to the zoo today. I love going to the zoo. Almost all the animals were out and active today too. Only ones who weren't were the bears. Lazy, misanthropic bears. I wound up taking 566 photos, which I then narrowed down to 72 worth uploading.
Rave: Getting stuff done. Have a million things left to do, but getting stuff done Rant: Wait, at a stopping point, can't do anything else until other people do their shit. Fuckery Rant: Work fucked up my pay. Had tonight put aside for groceries and fuck all time free between now and tuesday to do it. Pay fuckup has been fixed, but probably won't get money til tomorrow. Pain in the ass. (Yes I could pull money from savings/elsewhere to cover it, just don't like doing it).
Rant: The Uni I work at has 4 campuses, 736 teaching staff, 430 courses, and 22,274 students. 13,471 of those students are female. And yet, none of them are sleeping with me. What the hell, female students? In other news, I am astonishingly drunk.
Rave: 1 exam away from putting another semester in the win column. Rave: No papers or studying to do this weekend, and the Mrs. cut the lawn last night. Free time! Leisure reading? Sorta. Criminal psychology books to help me in my practicum working with hooligans. "Touch of Evil" and "Magic Trip" on the DVR, too. And I'm going to take the Mrs. out to dinner and then to see "The Help" this weekend. Her surgery is next week and she seems somewhat melancholy.
Rave: The whole family is finally here for their day on the base. Rant: It's only 85 degrees now, but it will be about 98 come noon-ish... Rave: Shouldn't be raining today...knock on wood. Rave: Winging tomorrow!! Soft patch/unofficial winging tonight!!