Rave: Been hanging out with this cute, cool chick that I met the first day in my new town for a couple days now. Rant: Tonight she brought out her girlfriend. D'OH! Rave: At least now I have a solid in to this small town life. We're going wine tasting tomorrow, and I KNOW she has cute single friends.
I am bored out of my fucking mind. I got too drunk last night to do anything today short of lay around and touch myself. Rant: I stopped eating fastfood a few months ago in the interest of making some aspect of my life semi healthy. I left one loophole in this rule. I can have taco bell once every two weeks. Well today was my day to eat taco bell. Today was also the day I learned that the taco bell down the road has closed it's doors. I just wanted a god damn chalupa. I'm watching reruns of Saturday Night Live (Season 1) eating carrot sticks. This blows more than accidentally downloading a gay porn. Rave: I got drunk last night because I was celebrating. After a year and a half of what can only be described as hell on earth (my job) I got a promotion, and a 15% raise. Listen kids, hard work does pay off sometimes! After two weeks, i will no longer have mandatory over time. I get to go home at 4 and do whatever in the fuck I want! I'm not sure how I will handle all this freedom. One thing is for sure, the clubs are coming back out of the closet.
Rant: I just got Verizon FiOS TV and internet. This would be a rave, but the installers didn't get here until 5 PM. I had spent the previous night getting to know a woman better but I had to leave before things could get going. I had to leave so I could be awake in time for these assclowns to show up. Why was this a problem? The time window I was given was 8 AM to noon. I had to wake up at 8 AM on a fucking Saturday for nothing. When they finally did show up, my TV went down until they got everything installed. I missed the Seahawks defense treat Brett Favre like a Vietcong POW. Rantier: My internet is now down after working for all of an hour. I've attempted to restart everything multiple times. I'm posting this after tethering my cell phone to my laptop. Rantiest: Verizon's 24/7 tech support telephone voice software suffered a fatal error (it actually fucking said that to me) after failing to remotely fix the issue. Now, I have to wait until tomorrow to call the installer and have them come back out and figure out what the fuck is wrong with my connection. tl;dr. Fuck Verizon.
Rave: today is my father's 52nd birthday, and I wish him at least 40 more. He is awesome, as well as my mother. They have gone an unbelievable distance to make sure my brother and I were successful, and I will be forever grateful to them. In all honesty, I do not think better parents exist. Rave: I've been drinking many a black label/7 up. I start a new job on the 30th, and I move into a much nicer (yet cheaper) apartment on the 31st. Rant: Everything below this will be horribly negative Rant: I broke up with my girlfriend of over a year. The biggest issue is that I don't feel bad about it. The most disturbing thing is that she said, in what I feel was a last ditch effort, that she has never loved anyone like she had me. I am 23. She is 29. That's weird. Or maybe I'm an immature asshole. I'm not trying to glorify that in any way, I just can't wrap my head around that statement, which leads me to... Rant: I learned today that my parents have more than 2x left to pay on their house than I had thought. They just refinanced their mortgage to get some cash back to help me and my brother out with our student loans. I wish they had more security in their lives. Despite the whole "heartbreak" bullshit, the thing I feel worst about is that tonight, I've dedicated more time to my parents than I have in several years, and it was only for a couple hours. I absolutely feel like an ungrateful pile of shit. Maybe it's with age that I realize how much they have sacrificed, because this is definitely something new. The thing is though, is that they are perfectly content and happy, and I am glad they are. Rant: Rereading the previous rant has really made me realize how little I care about my extremely recent break up, this is kind of sad. I do hope that these events will lead me to re-prioritize my life. Rant: fucked up thing is that my mom wants grand kids. She will have better luck with my brother procreating in the near future. Rant: I've reread this post half a dozen times, and with each time, it makes me sadder. I've seriously been pecking away at this for half an hour, and it's even more depressing because this is my main outlet right now. My brother isn't picking up because it's late as fuck in his time zone, and that same excuse goes for everyone else that I would want to talk to about this even in this state. Rant: Fuck.
Rant: My ex-girlfriend who all year was on TV 24/7 because of an ad she did is now all over the city's newspaper. Haunting me. Rave: Current girlfriend is hotter. Rant: Current girlfriend is jealous of ex-girlfriend.
Rant: My grandmother broke her hip and was in traction until the surgery yesterday. Rave: There weren't any complications, and she's recuperating but doing well. She's 85, and there was of course the fear that she wouldn't survive the surgery. Rave: Dad managed to not bring Glenn Beck into the conversation when he called to give me the news.
RANT: So one of my sons was in the hospital the other day. (The intensive fucking care unit to be precise.) The Slag Whore ex wife of mine, chose not to tell me about this. I found out while at work through a friend of my girlfriends telling her about a status update she found by my kids' aunt. (Yeah reading through the sentence it's convoluted as hell but I am to annoyed to simplify. Suffice it to say I found out in a very roundabout through the grapevine manner.) Anyway, I call the Slag Whore at the hospital to find out what was going on with my boy. First fucking words out of her mouth?!?! "How did you find out?" HOW THE FUCK DID YOU FIND OUT?!?! My son is in the fucking ICU, and his bitch of a mother is wondering how I found out about it!!!! God fucking damn, why can't she be one of the stripper whores who winds up dead in the back of some rapist/torturers car!!!! Oh, and for the obnoxious bitch win, she is being very quick to hit my dad up for money to help "pay for your grandchild's medicine." I didn't know my two year old had glaucoma! Fuck I hate that bitch!
Rant: Running your own fantasy football league is a pain in the ass. Had 4 people on skype and was best available drafting for 3 others in a 12 team league. I'd much rather just participate. Rave: Draft is done and I'm sitting with my pooch drinking a couple of dark and stormies while enjoying a delicious cigar. Life is good. Rant: I'm on the cusp of getting drunk but I have so much to do tomorrow and will regret it in the AM. I know it's going to be bad news but the tide is pulling me along.
Rave: Finally got the bikes out to the ranch. I have two: one mountain bike, one road bike (not the kinds with motors, the kinds with pedals). I'm going to absolutely destroy my legs riding the mountain bike around the ranch, and I can't wait to get back going for 60-80 miles rides on the Trek roady. Rant: Unfortunately, the above rave means I have to start shaving my legs again. That's about the most un-manly thing any guy can do, but the inevitable road rash + hairy legs = worse results than any perceived gay act can out-weigh. Bikes back, YAAAAA!!!! But FUCK!
???: I think my life is heading into a completely different phase. This weekend I got drunk at a 1 year old's birthday party.
Rant: Fuck I cannot fall asleep when I need to wake up by a certain time. And I am gunning for a 4.0 this semester. Too much stress, fuck fuck fuck. Rave?: An excuse to watch The Wire, smoke cigarettes and eat pizza. Meh.
Rave- Just got back to the land of the living after a rather painful, general anesthesia (elective) surgery on Tuesday to repair a hernia, among other things. Rant- I've had a few minor surgeries before, but this was the first time I ever had to use the pain medication they offered me, and a number of times at that. Rave- Took my last pain medication on Friday, three days after the surgery. Most people with the same surgery continue to take them before bed 2-3 weeks later. Pussies, all of them! Rant- I've had several distinct dreams after the surgery. Two were about eating delicious meat and one was about working out. (Swear to God) I can't lift weights for four weeks and have an altered, limited diet for 6 weeks after surgery. I have already lost some weight and will drop more. Rant- Went six whole days without eating meat AND ejaculating, both records for my adult life. Rave- Both streaks snapped today. Rant- Learned a few hours ago that master director Satoshi Kon died on Tuesday at the age of 46. Very tragic.
RAVE: Went down to the Jeet Kune Do camp in NSW over the weekend to assist Sifu who was there as a guest presenter. We did a couple of seminars, including one on mobile kicking. I was sick and my joints are stuffed, but I was helping a small group get their footwork and weight transfer right so I put a half pace kick into the bag one guy was holding. His eyes goggled after and I thought something was wrong. Then he told me that was the hardest kick he'd ever felt. It made my weekend that even though sick, tired, sore and running at half pace, I've still got it. RANT: I was also crash dummy for Sifu. Hitting a takedown, he's rammed my shoulder into my ear and I have this huge lump on the back of my jaw that's making life a little uncomfortable. At least, I think that's what caused it....
Rave: Went up to Laramie and went out drinking with my cousins and some old friends. Rant: Some asshole pushed me while I was holding a flaming shot used for the "Danny Tanner" (the local specialty in which the shot is set aflame and dropped into beer and oj) which spilled on my hand which is now burnt and blistered. Rave: Bartender thought we were awesome and that seeing my hand on fire warranted a round of free Danny Tanners.
Long-winded rant that I posted elsewhere: So I've planned a big old trip, my triumphant return to the US, to a friend's wedding in October followed by several NBA games, and I asked buddy if he'd be keen to come. This guy has never been to the US, but is an NBA fan so I figured he'd be down. One of our other mates, an Aussie that lives in Sweden and who hasn't seen either of us in awhile, decides he'll meet us in New York City then come to Vegas with us, and asks if one of his friends can come. Buddy 1 says to me "fuck no, that other guy's probably a dick, let's keep it as just an awesome week in Vegas with the three of us". Precedent is now set - this is important later. So we organise this sweet trip, including what was to be a "guys week" in Vegas, catching up and getting fucked up with guys who used to be really tight-knit a couple of years ago. I'm fucking pumped about spending a couple weeks with two of my best mates and enjoying the single life again (and exploiting my sexy Australian accent in American bars again). A week later, Buddy 1 asks if he can bring a girl to Vegas. Not his girlfriend, or wife, or a friend we all know - a girl he knew for two weeks on a European tour in early 2009 who lives in San Diego. We told him he "set the precedent for the guys week in Vegas, so our vote is 'no'." Disregarding this, he organised for her to come anyway, and stay in the spare bed in the two rooms we booked at Flamingo. When this finally comes out six weeks later, he laughs off our idea that the Vegas portion of the trip was set to be the ultimate in buddies catching up after having not seen each other for ages. "It just doesn't mean that much to me," were his exact words. So now he's ditched us for a girl he barely knows - who has a boyfriend might I add, so he won't be getting any - and said he won't see us for the whole week in Vegas. Rave: In response, we've cancelled Flamingo, got a bigger and better room at MGM and plan to have a fucking off-the-hook week without him anyway. General rave: New York City, Vegas, San Francisco, Portland, San Diego in October/November! Fuck I can't wait to get back on US soil, wreak some havoc and pound some PBR. I also missed your bar food, and women, but not in that order.
Rave: Passed the last piece of my kidney stone today!!!!!!!!!!! WOO-HOO!!!!!!!!!!! Rant: Left my urine strainer at home, because today just didn't feel like a "passing a kiwi seed through my pee hole" kind of day. Rave: But it was!!! Let me be clear here: I no longer have any sharp rocks in my urinary tract. It's all golden from here on out (pun intended)!!!! Rant:Tried to fish it out of a piss-filled public toilet (for lab analyzation) and failed. It slipped away from me and all I got for my efforts was urine up to my elbow. Le sigh.