As soon as you begin to feel sick take 4 tylenol, 2 litres of orange juice and go to sleep. You'll wake up good as new. Edit: some can drink more than others. Just drink a fuck ton of OJ.
A drug expiry date simply means that 90% of the active ingredients still remain in the pills, whether it's over the counter or prescription. And for that matter they run the tests at high temperatures and then extrapolate down to room temperature. And even then, since lawyers rule the world, use a conservative figure. Considering people tend to keep meds in the bathroom, which usually has a fair amount of heat and moisture from showers and which hastens the decay of the drugs, this probably has something to do with the rather conservative figures. Oh, and a conspiracy to keep people buying drugs when the bottles aren't empty. Me, I like saline nasal sprays, salt gargles and warm honey / lemon juice mixtures when my throat is sore. Also, pseudoephedrine. That shit is so fucking useful: keeps your nose from running, keeps you going when you're sleep deprived, and can be turned into crystal meth if you're in a pinch and have a few buckets worth of pills lying around. Want to hear a random remedy? Tonic water can be used to treat restless leg syndrome. Oh, and Dr. Frylock, Zinc does have some physiological effect. Zinc nasal sprays have been known to cause irreversible loss of smell in some cases. How's that for a physiological effect.
Volo reminded me of my own cure all for hiccups. I fucking hate hiccups with a white hot passion. And I can't stand it when someone around me has them. The cure is to eat a spoonful or two of peanut butter. It has worked every single time I have tried it or had someone else do it.
At the moment, I've got pneumonia. Honest to goodness pneumonia. It started out as the flu, that turned into a run of the mill virus, which changed into an upper respiratory infection, and then finally developed into pneumonia over the course of a month. I don't have real health insurance because I'm a graduate student, so I typically try to bolster my immune system by adding a clove of garlic to any dish which will allow it. I also liberally use hot sauce on damn near anything. I've also been drinking Rooibois tea mixed with honey and lemon, but it's not been doing much. In the last two weeks I've taken to drinking Delsym straight out of the bottle while the course of antibiotics I'm on works on the bacterial infection. I'm starting to improve. Yesterday I felt pretty great. I woke up today coughing up green phlegm and barely able to talk. The only positive from this situation is that I've convinced a woman from my program to come play nurse.
I have no idea why, but this stuff cures every symptom of a hangover I have ever had. It tastes like watered-down bubble-gum flavored orange soda and I'm pretty sure it has no real nutritional value, but I feel 100x better after drinking it.
God invented bourbon not only to enjoy and drunken, but to clear out any upper body cold or flu. Neat Bourbon (no ice, no mixers) cauterizes a sore throat, numbs it as it passes by, and generally numbs the body as more and more medicine is imbibed. Fine bourbon is nice, but average bourbon is what is really needed to drink in quantity to achieve the necessary medicinal goals.
I have a go to that I swear by for colds, inspired by evolutionary medicine. The common cold is a viral infection of the mucous membrane, this is why you get a runny nose and the sneezing; your body is ejecting the mucous membrane. The problem is the virus keeps infecting the new mucous membranes so you stay ill until your body gets the right antibodies ready for battle. From what I've read, zinc lozenges have the effect of stopping the virus from infecting new layers of the mucous membrane, this is why they say they reduce the length of the cold. The new layers are far less infected than before. Thus, if you start taking it at the first sign of a cold, your cold will be less severe and shorter in duration. Combine this with a little green tea with ginger and OJ to boost the immune system and colds are more or less a non issue outside for maybe one actual bad day. When I get sick, it is always gone in 2 days max. There are several things that I know do not work. One is taking excess amounts of vitamin C via supplements. Any vitamin C taken beyond what your body requires is not used and just has the result of making your piss yellower. Also, most common cold medicines target cold symptoms. However, since they stop runny noses and sneezing, this also means that your body is not expelling the infected mucous membrane and it may lead you to remaining sick longer. Of course, if you have something important going on and need to get through a day, it makes sense to take these as you can deal with the cold at a later date. [/semi-informed opinion]
Sore throat? I swear by gargling salt water, and gargling dissolvable aspirin. Drink the aspirin, not the salt water. My brother reckons the best remedy is to take a bottle of vodka, empty some out and pack it with hot chillis. Let it steep for 6 months. When you get sick, take a shot. If it doesn't kill you, you're cured. I have yet to see any evidence of this even existing, let alone working. For hayfever, mix a couple of teaspoons of salt into some tepid water (body temperature). Inhale it through your nose and out your mouth. Sounds gross and hard to do, but it's only the ick factor that gets you. The big thing is to get the temperature as close to your body temperature as possible. If you don't know why, snort ice water and see what happens.
NyQuil Jager Bombs Whenever I'm sick with a head cold/aches/flu symptons I just make a few of these in the evening. I started to realize that NyQuil tastes a lot like Jager anyway so I just mix equal parts NyQuil & Jager and drop them into a small glass of Red Bull. Not sure if it makes me kick the sick any faster, but I sure as shit feel better after a couple of those.
For sore throats, gargle with salt water. If it is bacterial at all, the high salt content fucks with the bacteria. Why? Because they are halophobic. That's why. Allergies/Sinus issues: NETI POT. I cannot spout highly enough the praises of the Neti pot. Sure, the end looks like a penis, so it looks like a dick up your nose, but it works wonders.
Taking the amino acid Arginine ( as a powder mixed with water or milk ) is great for giving a guy strong erections.