People enjoy all sorts of different things. Everybody should have hobbies, they can help make life worth living. Occasionally, however, you'll run into somebody who is really into something, as more than just a hobby. They're doing it because it helps define who they are, and they love talking about it because they really want to impress you with how awesome they are because they are into that thing. It's gone beyond a hobby and into a lifestyle of sorts. Often, the implication is that if you are NOT into that thing, then maybe there is something wrong with you. You, on the other hand, have a severe case of "don't-get-it-itis." In fact, you may actually think LESS of the person for being so involved, because it seems like they're compensating for something. Some potential examples, off the top of my head: Tattoos or body modifications. Guns/shooting. Membership in a fraternity/sorority. The Society for Creative Anachronism. FOCUS: What are people you know really, really into, but that you just don't get at all? How do you deal with their incessant braggart-ry about it? What do you think is the REAL reason they're into it? What do you whisper about these people behind their backs? ALTERNATE FOCUS: Are you one of these people, and self-aware enough to share it with us? If so, what's your "thing?"
ALT FOCUS: My martial arts, which is a kung fu based freestyle (mixed martial arts if you like - kung fu, muay thai, boxing, judo, ju jitsu). There's people who train, and it forms a large part of their life. For me, I've become a traditional student of a style. That means I'm expected to be an embodiment of the values and morals of that style. As well as the typical physical stuff most people would expect, we have history, philosophy, personal development, anatomy and physiology. I'm expected to be a representative of the style at all times, whether people know it or not. And I'm expected to ultimately learn everything we have. Perhaps the easiest way to explain it is that in a lot of martial arts people act one way on the mat, and go back to their "normal" selves off the mat. I act the same way on or off the mat. For me it's easy as the values and morals of our system are more or less complementary with my own anyway.
Well around here particularly it is everyone's god damn obsession with how manly they are because they only partake in the highest quality scotches, NEAT ONLY GOD DAMNIT! My mom's boyfriend once tried to introduce me to the whole culture of drinking fine scotches/whiskeys. He told me how to sample a fine Irish scotch (or whiskey or whisky, or what ever deviation you like to prattle on about) my Aunt and Uncle had gotten him one of their travels to Ireland. It tasted like alcohol that had been soaked in wood. I'd say a quality piece of wood but wood none the less. Maybe it was the barreled aging that infused the flavor but it wasn't something I thought was so damn awesome I needed to take it up as a hobby I could brag about how sophisticated I am for doing it. I usually just make snarky comments about it and compare it to other just as boring pseudosophisticated activities like wine tastings and micro breweries. Like the other activities it really seems like the main reason they do it is to brag about how sophisticated they are with an added weight of lame machismo on top of it. They think having a tumbler of Johnny Walker Gold Reserve is going to make them a suave Don Draper or James Bond with the ladies. Iv'e never really correlated drinking alcohol with anything except the end result of getting drunk. So finding the finest scotch to sip neat or the best wine paring never meant anything to me.
Not to spark a debate, but people who are overly religious. If you believe in God or whatever, that's cool, just not my thing. I just don't get the people who go to church every Sunday, always insist on praying before eating, etc. I definitely associate uber-religious types as being not so smart.
Texas Hold 'em. Jesus, I just don't get it. Nobody realized that this game even existed until a few years ago when they were told that they as society must now love it, and therefore it is the coolest thing ever. It's cards. It's what old people play because it hurts too much to stand up. Instead, we have this shit clogging up all the sports channels for the last six years because watching a bunch of douchebags wearing sunglasses and goofy cowboy hats that say two words to each other every 45 minutes somehow qualifies as a "sport". I look at this the same way I look at the so-called "Latin Music Craze" from 10 years ago. Living la vida overrated. People who turn their houses (where other people live) into their collectable museum. Collecting shit is fine (I myself collect old Coca-Cola merch) and there's nothing wrong with donating a corner of your place to house your wares, but when your entire house is filled with dragons or unicorns or fucking holstein cows then you simply look completely insane and you had better get somebody to slap you soon or there's no hope for you. Psychics, energy healing, faith healing, jewel therapy, etc. all of it in one way or the other is bullshit. These people are con artists apt and doing exactly what you want them to do, and that's the ONLY thing they do. People cannot see the future and cure your arthritis by waving hands over your head.
People who have recently discovered exercise and have become some version of Tony Little. Listen, I'm happy for your healthier lifestyle change/choice. Exercise is good. Exercise is great. You've bettered yourself more than you'll know. Now shut the fuck up. I've been living a healthy active lifestyle that incorporates daily exercise for over 12 years. There's nothing you picked up from "your trainer" that will change my life. Do not comment on the calories in the beer I'm about to drink when we're out. I know how many are in it, that's why I run and lift every day. I don't care about your lifts, "massive gains", or how ripped you'll be in 2 weeks. If you stick with it for more than a year then we can sit down and compare notes.
I took this about 10 steps too far in my early 20's and thought anyone that didn't practice a traditional martial art (including elite football players) was athletically inferior. It took about 3 months of getting the shit kicked out of me by a 40 year old BJJ purple belt to wise up, broaden my horizons, start watching UFC an pick up strength training.
On this note, I have a cousin who converted to Mormonism. To understand why I don't get it, you have to know a few things about her first. This was a girl who could drink like a champ, swore like sailor, enjoyed sex, smoked pot every day, and couldn't get through the day without caffeine. Now, she goes to church for three hours sermons, moved into an apartment complex where every other tenant goes to her temple, has given a Mormon bible to every member of our family, and tells me it's OK if I don't convert, because she's just going to convert me by proxy when I die.
People with excessive school pride. I'm looking at you, Aggies. They have dozens of traditions and go on incessantly about how their school is the "best in the land". It's obnoxious. Nobody's arguing with you because nobody else gives a shit. You are the only person in this "debate". Everyone from my high school who went there for school entered as a normal, moderate 18 year old. They came out an overly-religious, right-winged, narrow-minded Aggie with a mechanical engineering degree, a truck, and a husband at the ripe age of 22. Kids are brainwashed at Texas A&M. Even worse, I dated a guy whose parents had a room decked out in UGa gear. Nobody in the family went there or had any sort of connection to that school other than living in Georgia. Lame.
This. Have your religion, do what you like. I'm not interested, but thanks for asking.... every time we cross paths. No, really, I'm not interested. I run out of words to express how arrogant, overbearing, ignorant and just plain fucked up this practice is. It's not the act itself, as it has zero effect. It's the audacity of the person, whether they know me or not, to feel it is their right to completely invalidate my free choice. There's things I let slide, but this is not one of them.
Focus: I've got a few examples. Car Guy. Don't get me wrong - I love a sweet ride. But I know a handful of people that simply do not shut-up about their cars. When two of my friends start talking about their cars, I will NEVER contribute to the conversation, for my lack of car knowledge would only embarrass me. The thing I hate about 'Car Guy' is that he is always right. No car is better, faster, and more well maintained than his car. Any arguments to the contrary will be greeted with scorn and disdain. House Reno Guy We all know somebody who is a self-proclaimed, Mr. Fix-It. They never shut up about the renovations their making to their home. Facebook is the worst, because every handy-man feels the need to brag incessantly about 'dry-walling their basement' or 'putting new flooring in their bathroom.' Fantasy Sports Guy Anybody who plays fantasy sports knows full-well who I'm talking about. The guy who is in five different fantasy football leagues. The guy who sits on his ass all day during his days off (and often while on the clock) doing mock drafts, reading fantasy magazines and criticizing others for their draft selections. You know the guy who'll tell the fantasy football rookie, "Oh my God, you're a fucking idiot! I can't believe you picked Joe Flacco in the fourth round. My fantasy magazine had him going in Round 7!" It gets even worse during March Madness. Fantasy Sports Guy will ridicule the cute secretary who did her best to fill out a bracket simply to participate in a little bit of office fun. "Seriously Sarah, you're bracket is a joke! How could you pick Iowa to beat Kansas! A #1 seed NEVER loses in the Sweet 16. Why would you even bother? You should have let me pick your bracket for you. When you won, I'd only ask for half of your winnings."
In my late twenties and early thirties before I bought the bar I got a little to "into" the whole biker scene. My primary source of transportation was my Harley and I regularly rode with local MC's in the area. I'd got to events, ride in the poker runs, hang around the local club houses getting shithoused(albeit still being respectful of their club), and generally lived the life being just this side of being in one of the clubs. Then my wife got pregnant and something inside me clicked. I had to live and provide for someone else now as it wasn't just my wife and I anymore. Don't get me wrong, I didn't give up riding but I started to distance myself from some of the more unsavory types I was hanging around. I still rode with a local club until just recently(traded my bike for a '67 Bronco) and remain friends with them, but now with two little girls my priorities are in a different place.
Holy shit car guys suck. There was an entire clique in my high school of kids who loved their cars/talking about their cars/fantasizing about running away to marry their cars in Mexico, where I assume it is legal. They weren't even the mechanically skilled guys who worked in car shops and shit, because where I lived they were all rich, so it was just toys from daddy. The funny part was if you even jokingly said their car was bad or you could beat them in a race they became seriously irate.
First person who mentions LOST gets an excruciating skull fucking, fair warning. Band/Group Huggers - The people who love nothing more than some indie band with no hope of ever succeeding as musicians because they are edgy and soooo not mainstream. Look fucktard I've got news for you, if that band could get paid seven figures to imitate Justin Beiber tracks, they would. They aren't hip, edgy, or anti-establishment, they just plain fucking suck, and the only thing that sucks worse is your retarded argument about how great they are and your snobbery towards others regarding them or how they "don't get the band".
If I could make money off of everytime I've heard the phrase "they're a pretty small, obscure band. You probably haven't heard of them...", I would own the entire internet; I would just buy the entire fucking thing. Focus: Camera geeks: Okay, we get that you just dropped five grand on a camera and lens. Yeah, you can take the most crisp, colorful pictures known to mankind. Oh, what's that? All of your pictures suck and then you run them through photoshop with a bunch of crappy filters? Yeah, go suck a tailpipe for a while. Audiophiles: Jesus fucking shitass. Audiophiles are easily the most stuck up, narcissistic, snobby dolts ever. Sitting there, denouncing digital because the vinyl record they found at that store sounds so much warmer with it's analog output. Nice work, dropping eight grand on a speaker system that sounds about the same as my five hundred buck set.
Militant non-drinkers: Yes, very good. You don't drink. You've also made it a hobby of lecturing people on the evils of drinking, citing numerous cherry-picked scientific studies you read about in Seventeen magazine or whatever. Your car has a "Something Against Drunk Driving" sticker, or maybe a "High on Life" sticker. However, your personality is that of a prune and your preaching about me having a beer at a party is getting on my nerves. I'm not bugging you, why are you bugging me? To (mis?) use the words of Winston Churchill: "You are very ugly. I’ll be sober in the morning."
The people that are addicted to Lost....whatta bunch of freaks. They can't seem to face the fact that it's over. GAWD. I have some friends that are freaks about Dave Matthews. They go see him every year, back before kid they'd go more than once a year. The rest of us just don't get it. We make constant fun of them. Seriously, how many times can you see the same band sing the same shit? They've been into it for almost 10 years now. I have nothing against the band or music really but, twirling around in circles all hopped up on X just isn't my idea of a concert. Perhaps it's too hippyesque for my taste. Yeah that very well may be it.
How about if your car has any fucking sticker? I hate bumper stickers--always have. I see the same van from time to time that's covered in them. More sticker than actual paint. A few of my friends collect them and display them proudly. "OBX, man. Look!" Nothing makes me want to run a car off the road more than when I see "proud parent of an honor student" or a giant peace sign across a picture of the Earth. What's that? "Baby on Board" huh? Well that just makes me want to swerve in front of you and toss molotov cocktails out the window. You know what's "on board" in my car? My nuts. They're immeasurably important and I love them, but I don't have stickers on the outside of my car asking other drivers to be mindful of the space around me because of them.
I was at my friend's place this past weekend for dinner and her cousin and cousin's wife were there along with her parents. A couple that I didn't know but that they were all familiar with came up in conversation. The woman's husband was planning on moving to a new city to practice medicine, but his wife would not let him even consider our city (where he has friends, family, and connections) because we do not have a professional level league for Disc Golf. Somebody needs to get their priories in order!
Anti-focus: If it isn't obvious, I'm a gun person. I am not an in-your-face NRA fanatic who believes every single "quality citizen" should have a gun on them (I typically walk away from those discussions/arguments), but more like a very frequent target shooter and hunter. I'm one of those guys that has known how to aim a gun since they were knee high and had firearms safety hammered into them at that very young age. I am especially interested and involved with making and designing firearms and components because I have been working on my own guns for awhile and last May I started my own business making stocks- the wood part of the gun. I try and make rifles as accurate as mechanically possible, so I do very precise and detail-oriented work. With that being said, it makes a lot more sense for me to be constantly thinking up ideas and solving problems related to my gun projects. If I am doodling in the middle of class, I am drawing up bedding blocks and special lamination operations. I am pretty quiet about it in public (telling girls I make guns in my basement is a terrible pick-up line) but I share a lot of information online, mainly because I do some pretty unique projects and I work on target rifles, so my guns can do things that a lot of guns can't. People like photos of fancy guns with pretty wood anyways and I do take a great deal of pride in my work because I do as much as possible by hand- my chisels and rasps are extensions of my hands and I have callouses from how I hold sandpaper. I know it does turn a lot of people off because A. there is a widespread negative stigma surrounding virtually all firearms and B. I'm 21. Most people just can't name any other people my age with the same interest in accurate rifles, so sometimes it gets awkward. A lot of people think of 21 year old guys as the type that buy surplus military arms and ammunition in bulk quantities for the sake of blowing shit up and making noise with their buddies, and I am the opposite of that. I try to approach all firearms with intelligence and safety and not be perceived as your average jackass with a gun. My business clientele is often up to 3x older than me and the guys are nationally recognized as the best at what they do, so I absolutely have to be professional and knowledgeable at all times (credibility and performance are king). You wouldn't be able to identify me as one if you randomly saw me in public, but I am definitely a gun person.