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Oh baby, that was the best orgasm EVER! You're a rockstar!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by vex, Aug 1, 2011.

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Faked orgasms

  1. I'm a woman, and have faked an orgasm

    17 vote(s)
    11.9%
  2. I'm a woman, and have NEVER faked an orgasm

    7 vote(s)
    4.9%
  3. I'm a man, and have faked an orgasm

    71 vote(s)
    49.7%
  4. I'm a man, and have NEVER faked an orgasm

    43 vote(s)
    30.1%
  5. I'm just here to fuck Chater. I better not have to fake it.

    5 vote(s)
    3.5%
  1. vex

    vex
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    Experienced Idiot

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    Faking an orgasm is counter-productive in my opinion. You're giving me false signals that what we're doing is working for you. I can't imagine how that is going to help us in any way.

    I've never discovered that a partner was faking orgasms. I feel that I would be pretty disappointed. I'm not a fan of lying, manipulation or abuse of trust.
     
  2. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

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    This, pretty much. I faked it exactly once, the first time I got head. Haven't since I reached the age of majority.

    For one thing, it feeds into the idea that orgasms are the "end-all, be all", which is part of the problem in the first place. It can also reinforce bad habits and make people feel lied to. Plus it probably leads to worse sex. I've always asked my partners explicitly not to fake it; does it suck when they don't get there? Sure. But at least I know what's going on rather than questioning.

    All that being said, people suck at faking orgasms, in general. Just like they suck at fake laughing and fake crying. There are people that can do it, for sure, but most people (and by this, I mean women here), aren't nearly as clever as they think. I cringe during that seen in When Harry Met Sally.
     
  3. Dcc001

    Dcc001
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    I think a large majority of girls have faked at some point in their lives. It's an interesting question: if the purpose of sex is to mutually enjoy one another, why would you ever fake enjoyment, thus defeating the purpose?

    Personally, I've faked when it's been a random one-nighter. It's really hard to relax and have good sex the first time with anyone (for me, at least). My mind is typically racing and demanding that I enjoy this or orgasm first or whatever, and obviously that just makes things worse. If it's someone you'll never see again and you want to give them a good impression, that can be reason enough. Again, this is me speaking for myself, not generalizing for all girls.

    I've been doing a lot of reading about sexual addiction and/or disorders. There are tons of case studies where one of the partners in a marriage has faked orgasms the entire time with their spouse. Typically when this kind of chronic faking is occurring it points to deep rooted problems with their sexuality and/or past trauma and abuse. There's a difference, I think, between faking it with some random guy and faking it for six years with your husband.

    Then again, the willingness to fuck someone you'll never see again at the expense of your own pleasure probably also indicates some issues.
     
  4. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    As an unrelated aside, the chronic shroud over the female orgasm is probably part of the reason some guys love squirters so much. Of course, they fake that now too.
     
  5. Noland

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    How? A guy's orgasm is a pretty obvious thing, so unless she had never seen one before and had zero knowledge of male sexuality, I can't figure out how this is possible.
     
  6. Dcc001

    Dcc001
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    Can we add an alt. alt. focus? Guys, can you tell when a girl is actually orgasming? Aside from squirting (which presumably is rare), can you physically feel it?
     
  7. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    She was one of those "don't cum in my mouth" types, so when it came time for me to "finish", I just pretended to turn elsewhere.

    Yes. These things don't ALL always happen, but they usually happen in some combination:

    Quick shallow breaths
    Increased lubrication
    Flushed redness over the upper chest
    Muscle tightening, especially around the pelvis
    Rhythmic vaginal contractions
    Vaginal pulsing, which is different from above, but I can't describe it.

    Note that loudly moaning "oh god I love your cock SO MUCH", isn't anywhere on the list.
     
  8. Devils Advocate

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    On the other hand though, I am sure there are guys out there that wouldn't know the difference between a fake orgasm and real orgasm either. If they could tell the difference then women wouldn't even bother trying to fake it.
     
  9. Dcc001

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    Personally, when I get close I go quiet. So I suppose the ability to yell something to the effect of "Oh baby you fuck me so good!" is in and of itself an indication.

    Want to know if a girl is faking it in porn? Look at her feet. Especially the amateur webcam stuff. If she's moaning and gasping and whatever, but her feet are relaxed? Fake. If her toes are pointed while this is going on? Most probably real.
     
  10. ghettoastronaut

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    Why would I care about that?
     
  11. iczorro

    iczorro
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    Reminds me of an old joke.

    Q: How can you tell when a woman is faking an orgasm?
    A: Who cares?

    I was going down on a girl once and when she got off the taste changed. I think that's the only girl I've ever had that happen with, but I generally notice some sorts of unfakable physical signs (the body flush is a big one). I know I've had a couple fakers on my hands in the past, but I was in my early 20s and figured that if they cared enough to make me feel good about it, or maybe just wanted it to be over, I should give them what they want and blow my load.
     
  12. Kubla Kahn

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    As long as I don't have to fake an orgasm who the fuck cares? My orgasm is tied directly to the physical sensations on my cock. Honestly there isn't a world of difference between a non cumming pussy and a cumming pussy in the feeling on the cock department, outside of the girl that get seriously wet. I've never had a girl who's cumming sent me over the edge. On the other hand if the girl has excellent muscle control and can squeeze down as I thrust you can feel a HUGE different then just pounding your run of the mill vag.

    Question do girls feel guys cumming? Do you feel the pump action of the shaft or the little squirts of jism hitting your insides?
     
  13. Nick

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    Can we also have a thread about faking not having an orgasm? Back in my "premature" days, I used to be so self-conscious about not pleasing my girlfriend, so I would empty the chamber and just keep on keeping on. It was not pleasant for me, but I was terrified about underperformance, so I just muscled through.
     
  14. Trakiel

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    Call me Caitlyn. Got any cake?

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    I've faked orgasms before. If I've got a condom on I'm not gonna cum so there have been a few times when I just faked it because I got bored and wanted to be done with it. I don't think anyone's ever faked it with me but to be perfectly honest I don't really care if they did.
     
  15. Pussy Galore

    Pussy Galore
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    I get quiet, too. I'm not very loud to begin with (unless I'm drunk and therefore have no volume control), and orgasms within a reasonable time span require a good bit of concentration on my part, for some reason. The one time I can remember it being effortless was nearly 9 years ago.

    All the so-called cues - muscle tightening, foot flexing, shallow breathing - are pretty easily faked. I can flex my pelvic floor muscles to the beat of a song; faking a standard, steady rhythm is a breeze.

    Despite that, I do try my best to make it really happen. Whomever it is, one night stand or not, not correcting their actions is entirely unhelpful. I've had a regular booty call for the last 7 years, and for about 5 of those I "suffered" through our hook-ups because 1) I was so enamored with him initially, I didn't want to ruin our arrangement, 2) by the time I figured out the sex was subpar, it'd been a few years and I couldn't bear to tell him, and 3) I eventually stopped caring. I finally sucked it up a couple years ago and told him what to do differently, and I'm happy to report that he now knows what he's doing. To me, at least.
     
  16. rachiii

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    Here's a question for the guys on here: When did it become sexy for a guy to say "cum for me baby, cum now" regardless of how close you may or may not be to orgasming? All this does is put astonishing pressure on the girl, and make it incredibly unlikely I will orgasm. And, at some point, it makes it necessary for me either to a) fake it, which I don't want to do or b) say in the middle of sex "I'm not going to cum right now!" which kind of kills the mood.

    Is this a porn thing? I've slept with a couple of guys who've done this, and let me tell you, not appreciated.

    To the focus, I have never faked an orgasm, but I do have trouble getting off from penetration alone, so I fall in the "this feels good" camp for sex. I'm delighted to have sex, you know, a lot, but it's unlikely a lot of orgasms are going to result from the penetration aspect, so I need guys to understand this and not magically expect orgasms all the time. In the same vein, if what I'm doing to you feels good but it isn't going to happen, I want to know. I'll do my best not to be offended, although I may see it as a challenge.

    As several people have said on this thread, why wouldn't you want to know? Sex is about getting to know your partner's body and providing as much pleasure as possible. If you're faking it, you're undermining this process.
     
  17. Trakiel

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    Call me Caitlyn. Got any cake?

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    I've never seen a porn where a guy said this; most of the time if there's any talking turning the fucking it's the woman who's talking. Sounds more like something teenaged idiots came up with during a bullshitting session to obfuscate how much they weren't getting laid.
     
  18. Dcc001

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    The other side of this is that telling me not to cum when I'm getting close is fantastically hot. Can't speak for everyone, though.

    Sorry if that derailed a bit.
     
  19. shimmered

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    I've never faked it.
    I have laid there completely uninterested, though...and made no secrets that I'd rather have been scrubbing the bathtub or cleaning the refrigerator.

    Now, if I know it's just not happening for the evening, I just take over and make sure he's taken care of...his pleasure is gratifying to me.
     
  20. jordan_paul

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    FOCUS: I don't think anyone has faked orgasm with me. I'm pretty lucky because it's pretty easy to tell when my girlfriend gets off. Her pelvic muscles like, contract and release rapidly? Sort of how Nom C. described it as vaginal pulsing. Also the viscosity of her lubrication changes. It goes from being slightly viscous to being like water. I might have to do a taste test too, to see if iczorro is right.

    ALT FOCUS:I've faked it twice with two different girls. I was wearing a condom with the first girl, it was late, I was kinda drunk, I was pumping away for 30 minutes and I wasnt feeling anything and I just wanted to go to bed, so I gave a couple of good hard pumps then stopped. She bought it, and I hid the condom so she couldnt see it.

    The second time I faked it was during the worst sex I ever had. This girl was good looking, but after the entrance to her vagina, there was nothing. She had no vaginal elasticity whatsoever, to the point I honestly didn't feel any skin against my dick. I knew I couldn't fake it without hurting her feelings because I wasn't wearing a condom this time. I was going for 20 or 30 minutes until I came up with what I though was a pretty win-win idea. I flipped her over, and stared pumping, did the fast hard pumps a few times, pulled out and dribbled spit on her back in a couple of different spots. It worked, I was sure to grab the sheets and clean her up so she would never know.