Whenever I hear about some idiot acting this way, I white-knuckle. WHY do women still look out for their friends and force themselves to hang up their night and baby-sit when they behave in such a disgusting manner such as this story? I don't know if it's motherly instinct or one of the other things that us guys are born without, but if that was ME with a drunk asshole friend I would be filling his pockets with condoms and then dumping him off at the gay bar during karaoke hour. People that act like that to friends that are looking out for them need to be taught a harsh lesson in life.
I was in New Orleans for the Sugar Bowl. I got a late start but ended up killing an entire bottle of Canadian Mist and bumped some Adderall before heading out around 9. I brought a bunch of beers along since it's open container down there. Most of the night was a blur and my friends cute sister later said I was barking like a dog most of the night imitating one of the colorful residents we had a run in with earlier that day. Now the worst part of the night I am even hesitant to relay to anyone out of the knowledge that Ill be mocked endlessly. But here it goes, I dropped my phone in a fucking port-a-potty and with lighting quick drunk fucked up reaction I fished it out before it could reach the bottom. But I still had my hand wrist deep in fucking the blue piss filled nastyness, and my phone is ruined. I also managed to rip my jeans half way up my leg on the stumble back to the hotel after losing my friends and not being able to contact them around 3 am. Tim Tebow and the Gators fucking CLOWNED us the following day. But despite all of it, it was a fun ass trip.
I'm still recovering from NYE. I didn't have much in the way of plans until right before I got out of work when I got a call from a friend that had an extra ticket to Paul Van Dyk's NYE show in New York. I'm not much of a dancer, but 5 hours of PvD, some (apparently shitty) E, and God knows how many shots led to me dancing my fucking ass off and having one of the best times I've had in a long time. The past couple days have been recovering from everything, but it was well worth it.
Pretty much my entire social life is at college, and I'm at home. My new years eve consisted of playing on my xbox from the wee hours of 3 PM, when I woke up, to my dad running down the stairs at some point swearing as he made his way to the kitchen. Apparently at some point the sky had gone dark, and apparently the reason he had come down was to collect champagne and glasses in preparation for the big moment, and apparently the reason he was swearing was because as he made his way down the stairs to the kitchen the time was 12:01 We woke up my mom, who struggles to stay awake past 9 PM, drank, and they went straight to bed while I continued playing on the Xbox until 5 AM. Yeah... I really can't wait to go back up to college and have an actual life again.
We went and saw my new horse in the a.m, then went down to the beach for lunch. It was blowing a gale, there was sand flying around and huge breakers crashing on the rocks. The sky was big and blue, and we sat eating seafood amongst a motley crew of random Europeans, one of whom looked very like Peter Fonda in 'Easy Rider' I fed prawns to a tiny wild kitten, and it was altogether great! Went on the roof to see fireworks at mid-night, and there were only 2 little fizzers, just out of sight, but the moon was full and I was kissing someone I love, so good times. Went back in (cos it was fucking freezing) and 20 mins later the real fireworks began. Spanish time bows to no man!
I was in San Francisco with a few of my friends. We ended up going to this party in someone's basement, and we ended up leaving soon after because it was full of guys in backwards baseball caps playing beer pong. We looked very out of place. When we walked out, some creepy guy asked us where we were going, and tried to get us to stay. He promised it would get better and we'd have fun. We tried to think of an excuse, and came up with "Uh, we have to go pick up a guy." At that moment, someone we didn't know came around the corner and said "I'm a guy." We offered to take The Guy with us, and then realized we actually had to pick someone up and wouldn't have enough room for The Guy. (this matters later in the story) At one point, we were walking down the street and a red dot from a laser pointer kept appearing right in front of us. We couldn't figure out where it was coming from, but we saw two people fucking through a window. Later, we were at someone's house, and some loud strangers walked past the gate to the front yard. One of my friends and I told them to go away in some very creative ways. Me - "Go away! Scram!" Friend - "Beat it!" Me - "Take a hike!" Friend - "Make like a tree and branch!" Me - "Make like a tree.. and fuck off!" About a minute later, we noticed they were still there, having a conversation. I tried to join in, and one of the girls said "you guys aren't funny." I replied, "well you're a fucking bitch." I expected them to pound on the front door or something, but I guess they weren't that offended. Another one of my friends showed up, and he had noticed an ambulance outside, a few houses down. We asked some stranger what happened, and he said there was some sort of head injury. As I was standing outside talking with a few people, someone familiar walked by. The Guy we saw walking down the street at that lame party, really far away, just happened to walk by the apartment. Friend - "HEY! You're that GUY!" Guy - "What? Oh hey, what have you guys been doing?" Me - "We've been drinking at this house!" Guy - "Can I have a beer?" We gave our beloved Guy a beer, and decided it was time to leave. The most sober of my friends drove my car around the corner, where we noticed a cop shining his flashlight at The Guy. He was walking around with the beer we just gave him, and he just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Poor Guy. I wish I knew who he was so I could apologize for getting him in trouble.