From Drew Magary's weekly mailbag: There are hundreds of similar discussions and arguments like this one- Superman or Batman? Gorilla vs. Landshark? Steak or Bacon? Most of these debates have a clear divide which force people to choose a side and hold on for dear life. This is the thread for these debates. Focus: What are your favorite nerdy debates, and on which side of the fence do you put yourself on? Be thorough in your arguments, because I can promise you, chances are that someone here will disagree with your take on things with a passion just as strong if not stronger than your own.
James Caan didn't fuck any aliens in Alien Nation, he told her he was a bigot and left and it's sad that I remember that. Focus - Indiana Jones. Remember Raiders of the Lost Ark? He was swimming in hot young ass. Students painting I Love You on their eyelids, the line to get into his office, you know he was flinging his dick into all kinds of random student trim. Then when he goes adventuring he's banging Kate Capshaw, hot Nazis and 80's Karen Allen. Solo turned down all kinds of ass to be monogamous with Leia, slave bikini be damned she's still just one princess.
Focus: Mac or PC. Oh, my bad. This isn't a debate that nerds have, because all nerds are in agreement that using a Mac is like shaving with a bowling pin.
Was JK Rowling, Peter Jackson, or just Saruman,,,,,,,, sexist? I present my, ahem, I mean somebody else's argument: Where the fuck were all the Orc and Uruk-Hai women in Lord of the Rings? Had they all been systematically decimated because they weren't warriors? The Riders of Rohan had E'owyn, who we all know not only killed the Gothmog, but King Angmar! Girlzzzz Power!!!! But there are no Orc or Uruk-Hai chicks. We're there none of them left because Orcs eat raw food and don't need their shit cooked? How sexist is that? "We don't need our food cooked, or our tattered clothes ironed, so there's no need for you. You can't swing an axe, so you have no value to our society?" There was a scene in one of the Rings movies where Saruman was hatching Uruk-Hai men from eggs like they were tadpoles in a murky swamp. Nary did I see a single women getting hatched. Did they breed them like the dinosaurs of Jurassic Park... But in reverse? All dudes? What? Was there a queen Uruk-Hai chick that laid the fucking eggs, and if so, wouldn't she be the "Queen Bee" of the group? I would think so, but Nooooo. Saruman deals directly with Shagrat, and apparently has utmost confidence in him as he places his hand on his face leaving the white imprint. As if to say: You're my leader into battle, you're my nigga, go kick some Riddermark ass! There is of course could be a simplistic answer, but I doubt it is correct. Remember when Gimli son of Gloin was explaining to E'owyn that the reason no one ever saw a dwarf woman, was because dwarf women looked like dwarf men. While I have no problem believing that Uruk-Hai and Orc women looked similar to Uruk-Hai and Orc men, the difference is that unlike the Dwarves, the Uruk-Hai and Orcs didn't have as much body hair,,, or clothing. Surely we would have seen some Orc tits then? Uruk-Hai hairy muff exposed? Nope. This is either a correct assumption, and or, the Uruk-Hai and Orcs were all post op trannies.
My Personal favourite: Are Atheism and Agnosticism the same thing? I say yes, most definitely. Atheism is just not believing in a God, Agnostics don't believe in a God either, so they are atheists. As are babies, mice and rocks. Agnosticism is a retarded word and fuck you if you use it.
You know what is even more retarded? Coming into a thread that is supposed to be a nerd debate, and trying to throw thelogic debate in, when you don't even know the definition of one of the things you are debating. This is like wondering who would win a fight, a predator or Darth Vader, without having seen star wars. Speaking of that, who wins...A predator or Darth Vader?
Atheist, Agnostic--in hell, they both burn at the same temperature.* Focus: Casablanca: "It's a great movie." "No, it isn't." See "Pop Culture Board" for more in-depth example. *Disclaimer: Levity, Leviticus, levity.
Vader of course. Predators fancy gun will simply bouce off his hands and then he force chokes him.....ooh ooh but the predator is invisible!!!111!!!. Yea, he'll just force choke him anyways. If Luke can find a little remote blind, I think Vader is gonna fins a cloked pred.
Vader feels the Predator get out of bed this morning and with the force knows the consistency of his morning glory. He waits for him to attempt an ambush, force grips him and rapes him with his light saber without breaking a sweat. Back home in time to watch the pod races on Intergalactic ESPN. Advantage: Vader edit: DAMNIT. Beat to the punch
I remember this from the old board... You toss four retarded children into the bilge of an oil tanker with a 6 foot Burmese Python for the long voyage back to Burma. A.) How many of the children, if any, survive. Does the snake survive? B.) Does the python eat them all at once or does he savor each one during the course of the voyage? C.) What's the spoilage rate on retarded children anyways?
-Beatles vs. any band any one else likes These debates were entertaining five years ago but I'm getting sick of them now. There is no way the Beatles will lose in any debate amongst friends or on a forum because some asshole will chime in that the Beatles practically invented pop music and any other band is just ripping them off. -How many 3rd graders would you be able to fend off before they killed you? The details change sometimes: Are the children bloodthirsty or just high off of sugar? Any of them fat? Are you allowed weapons or blunt objects? Are they allowed weapons or blunt objects? Are you at risk to be arrested? etc. -Gorilla vs. Lion Lion wins, the Gorilla-folk are retarded. -What pro sport requires the most athleticism/technique/elitism? Timeless and frustrating.
This is the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard. A lion beating a gorilla in a fight to the death? Absurd.
I am pretty sure that if they had no weapons, I could fend off an infinite amount of them. A friend of mine once asked how far I thought I could kick a new born child. I surmised about 10 feet if drop kicked. The baby fat would absorb a lot of the shock, and dampen the blow.
I get lost at 12 or so. 12 nine-year-olds scratching, and biting, and clawing and screaming? That's too much. Well not if I had an aluminum baseball bat or a portable chainsaw. But if they had blunt objects, it's a whole other ball game. I'd fend off like two or three, though it'd be funny seeing them wield weapons a bit too heavy for them.
This was an actual conversation one of my friends started with me a few years back. Friend: If you eat a hampster, would you be eating its asshole, too? Me: Uh...What? Friend: Ok, the 'eating a hampster' part aside can you technically eat something that's a hole? Me: No, you can't. You'd be eating the sphincter that creates the hole. Friend: But since a hole is created, aren't you essentially eating that space as well? Me: Even if you opened wide and ate the hampster in one bite, thereby consuming the entire space created by the sphincter, you still wouldn't be eating a hole. You'd be eating the air contained in the space that's created by the muscle there. You're getting tied up in semantics. The word 'hole' is technically incorrect. Friend: But... Me: Listen, go eat as much hampster ass as you want. We're done here. As I walked away shaking my head, he followed me, still attempting to argue that holes can indeed be eaten. To this day if it's brought up, he'll still asert that to be true. Another one (same friend) except I started the conversation. Me: If you're driving in a Ferrari Enzo at 200mph and you hit a moose, what do you think would happen? Friend: You'd lose a million dollars really fucking quick. Moose are huge, the car would be demolished. Me: Damaged, sure. But I don't think demolished. Those cars are so low to the ground and moose are all legs for about 3 feet. At 200mph, the car is traveling a football field per second. I think the body of the moose would never touch the car. It would be like standing a pencil up on a table and running your hand under it really fast. This conversation went on for far too long and ended with both of us maintaining our original predictions.
Han Solo. I don't care what the shitty Star Wars novels may have protrayed as happening after Return of the Jedi, I'm only counting what I saw in the movies, and at the end of the last Star Wars movie Han certainly wasn't married to Leia. I simply presume that after RotJ he eventually got bored with her and resumed his roguish ways and used his status as hero of the rebellion to get more pussy than ever before. Focus: Here are my opinions on some of the classic nerd arguments: Batman vs. Superman: Batman wins because he'd use kryptonite without hesitation. Superman is too honorable for his own good, which would be his downfall. Lion vs. Gorilla: Lion. Considering lions have been known to kill things bigger and meaner than a gorilla, I don't think it's much of a contest. Knight vs. Samurai: Depends; if the knight's wearing full plate armor he wins. Otherwise the samurai wins. Pirate vs. Ninja: Still undecided. Ginger or Mary Ann: This is really before my time and I've never even seen a single episode of the show, but based on how they looked at their best I choose Ginger.
That is one pansy-ass bear. When is a cable network going to realize that if/when they start an Animal Kingdom UFC they will make ridiculous amounts of money?
Baddest Chick on Movies-- Ripley from Aliens or Sarah Connor from the Terminator? Bonus points-- who would you rather have as back-up-- Kyle Reese or Corporal Hicks? Bonus Bonus points-- Which is the better line-- or Wow, I need a life
Which was worse, combat on the Western Front in the Great War or in the jungles of Vietnam? Favorite college argument in my dorm (history nerds). While both were terrible, the trench-foot, poison gas, dodgy medicine, and utter pointlessness* of WWI for me are convincing arguments. * Thought experiment: Try to come up with a worse outcome for WWI: America disgusted and isolationist, England and France bled white, the Middle East and Balkans fragmented into their current quarrels, Russia delivered to a band of psychopaths, Japan bitter and insulted, and Germany bitter and thirsting for a rematch.