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Naked Picture Etiquette

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Dcc001, Apr 20, 2012.

  1. Popped Cherries

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    I've never been tempted to send a picture of my cock to far away places. Can someone explain, in as little graphic detail as possible, the mechanics of how this works? Do you just flop it onto the coffee table and whip out your cell phone? Are these whole body shots in a mirror that people are just naked in? And the clincher, people really send pictures right as they're getting off?

    I understand the partial reverse of this. I like seeing women in lingerie, so a girl sending me a picture of herself dressed up is never frowned upon. However, if she just sent a closeup of her left nipple, I really don't see the appeal.

    This whole thread is mind boggling.
     
  2. Nom Chompsky

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    I'll help you, by explaining in as much graphic detail as possible, my PERSONAL preferred method for sending sexy pictures. Remember, this is what I actually do, so please keep that image in your mind as you read this post. However, it obviously also doubles as what I think of as best practices, so feel free to go nuts.

    It's important to know three things off the bat -- whether the person wants pictures in the first place, what they like to see, and what you've got to show. We're assuming that the answer is yes to the first question, otherwise, reset your game until you draw an opponent who wants to see the goods.

    You wouldn't flop your cock out in the beginning of a date, would you? Fine, you non-Charles Johnson people wouldn't flop your cock out during the appetizers, would you? I didn't think so. Start by sending a picture of the visible bits that best fit the paradigm "what you have and what they want." Maybe you've got a strong, defined chin with stubble that would feel so hot grazing an inner thigh. Maybe you've got a piercing set of bedroom eyes that hint at the mischief behind them. Maybe you've got lips so soft and full that she want to curl up in them and never wake up, but you've probably got something, so get to using it.

    Escalate. Maybe your shirt is more unbuttoned. Maybe there's just a hint of light glinting off of your collarbone, or the bulging muscles in your arm are straining through your flimsy t-shirt. Get creative.

    Innovate. Do you know how many people have the same mirror picture of themselves shirtless? Too many. Try using your camera or cell phone's self-timer, and taking a picture of your taut thighs, glistening with the dew of a hard workout. Or your sculpted calves, sliding all the way up to your shelf of an ass. Professional photographers throw out most of their pictures, so don't be afraid to take a bad one. Play around.

    Tease. Even when you're ready to get into the good stuff, subtlety is the soul of flirtation. Instead of flopping it onto the table, take a picture that hints at what's to come. Let her see how hard your boxer briefs are working to contain the insistent bulge underneath. Finally, after you've created the proper mood...

    Reveal. By this point, it should almost be natural that you'd be sending a picture of your hard cock, and if you're in the right kind of dynamic, she's probably sending you a picture of her licking her juices off of her fingers. Where you go from there is up to you -- I personally find it unwieldy to photograph and masturbate at the same time, but this is a pretty sparse example of a basic picture session.

    I should also point out, that you can do all of this with a fairly terrible cell phone camera and a little imagination.

    I hope that was graphic enough?
     
  3. JProctor

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    I strongly agree with this. On a site like aff, I'm quite inclined to give the guy the benefit of the doubt that he was acting appropriately.

    I've dated some people from the precursor to this site. One of them sent me photos, to which my verbatim response was "yeah, I'll bang you." And I did. In another instance, I propositioned one for a threesome without ever having met or even spoken on the phone. And we did. Would that fly on ok cupid? It never occurred to me to try, because of the high chance that the woman would be offended.

    You see, women aren't saying that on aff, any more than women are saying "don't approach me at all" as they walk down the street. Some aff users don't want nude pics, but is the custom in that subgroup not to send them? From what I recall, users have private albums with all kinds of pics, including nudes. After a message or two, they allow you to view private images. There's a major difference - on other dating sites, if "private images" included nude shots I'd think the girl was a little off.

    You may fail to recognize this distinction, in which case we'll have to agree to disagree. Or, you can acknowledge the distinction, but maintain that women can still decide on appropriate rules, at their whim, on the fly, because in sexually charged situations they should have that power - that's the nasty sort of feminism without empathy that concerns me.


    It's apples and oranges. This board has collectively decided that boys' peepees are icky, and collectively decided that there's nothing cooler than being outraged.
     
  4. Racer-X

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    All this dick pic talk gives me a business idea. A line of ultra-realistic model male hands made at 3/4 scale (or smaller) that you can use to hold your dick in your pics to make it look huge. For a higher price, send a picture of your hand and we'll make a reduced size model of it for added realism.

    I call copyright. note: I might not know how copyrights work.
     
  5. Pinkcup

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    Yeah, this isn't at all what we're actually talking about. If I'm invited to view a collection of pictures on AFF, I can safely assume that they won't be pictures of my smiling potential sex partner wearing khakis and a polo, surrounded by friends and family at a church barbeque. But in clicking on the link to view someone else's photos, I'm leaving my inbox (my space) and venturing into someone else's territory (not my space). Invitations can be accepted...or declined. But it gives me a choice. The rules change, then. Obviously.

    This isn't the debate. The debate is whether I "deserve" to have my inbox (my space) flooded with genitals in the text portion of the message solely because I've signed up for a website that specializes in fostering casual sex relationships. It baffles me that anyone can think that's okay.

    You must've meant this for another board, because nothing like that has ever been said or "collectively decided" on this board. As far as outrage goes--most women generally react to unsolicited dick pictures with exasperation. Nothing else. Possibly disgust, if it's a particularly gross one with warts and stuff. But I think it's been well established that nothing gets my hackles up quicker than sexist assumptions and bullshit like "she was asking for it." And, as far as I know, it still ain't "cool" to be an angry feminist. Not by a long shot.

    Project your shit elsewhere.
     
  6. D26

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    I think we're over thinking the whole "Why would a guy send dick pics" thing. I think it is simple projection.

    "I would like to see this woman's boobs/ass/vag, and would love it if she sent pictures of said body parts to me. Therefore, she will love it if I send pictures of my cock to her!"

    Basically, a guy wants to see a woman's naughty bits, so he assumes that she wants to see his naughty bits.

    Sure, the logic is flawed at its core, in that the vast majority of women require more than a cock shot to hook up with a dude, but I just think guys are fairly dumb like that. We all project and make assumptions based on our own wants and experiences, it is basic human psychology.
     
  7. shegirl

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    No one has anything to bitch about unless they were "surprised" by a youtube link to a giant gross hairy beast, high on God knows what, starring at his dick with the dairy cow stare while stroking off.

    YOU CANNOT UNSEE THAT SHIT.

    I'm sorry boys but you are built so much differently than we are, utilitarian-like, generally I don't find the male form all that hotty hot hot.
     
  8. JProctor

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    Yeah, I'm not so sure that the bright line rule between your inbox and someone's album is quite as bright as you suggest, especially if that inbox is within the adult site itself. Maybe you sign up for match.com and don't feel you deserve to have your inbox flooded with messages saying "wassup" from overweight fifty-somethings. I'll ask you for the second time: if you've spent some time on aff, and there's a rule or common understanding that unsolicited genital shots are out of bounds, please enlighten me. I don't condone behavior undertaken with the intent to offend or intimidate, but to scorn the photo-senders without first establishing the ground rules of the subgroup is like saying "ready, fire, aim."

    This is argumentative for the sake of being argumentative, and pretty ironic that you accused me of projection. It's so disconnected with my response to the question of why penis pics are unwelcome in the WDT that it doesn't merit a response.
     
  9. BeCoolBitch_BeCool

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    I don't think I've ever taken a picture of my penis out of sincerity. Usually just for a "good luck on your finals" text or my Christian-mingle dating profile.

    As far as discretion, sharing pictures someone sends you is in bad taste. However, I might occasionally forget that I have it set as my wallpaper when I let my friend borrow my phone. Same goes for pictures of my penis.
     
  10. Aetius

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    This logic is why I send women unsolicited pictures of my tongue.
     
  11. Pinkcup

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    Line-by-line analysis of where this poster has made serious errors? Sure! Why not?
    If you really can't see the clearly defined line between my inbox and your photo album, I really don't think anyone can help you. Having the choice to view an album on someone else's profile that may or may not contain genitals is a big, huge, massive, enormous difference from opening what seems to be a text-only message in my inbox and having no choice but to look at genitals. Again, if the difference isn't abundantly clear to you then I don't know what nuances you can contribute to this dialogue.

    Maybe you like to make inaccurate assumptions about my online dating experiences? Projecting, possibly? Just spitballing here.

    I haven't spent time on AFF other than signing up this afternoon to see if I can arrange a threesome (thanks for the tip, board members!), but from what I can tell it is NOT the norm to send unsolicited genital pictures.

    Also, I doubt most dick pic senders do so with the intention of offending or intimidating. This is why the earlier discussion about intent and motivation was so important. I am still convinced that the thrill of sending, for some exhibitionists, is more important than the wishes of the recipient. Just to be clear, that mindset is Fucked Up. If you have evidence or opinions to the contrary, I'd be more than willing to discuss that!

    But yes, scorning people who send unsolicited genital pictures is just like firing a gun at them.

    Which is why you responded, wasn't it?

    But seriously-- I don't present counterpoints because I enjoy the process of debate and it invigorates me to engage in antagonistic dialogue. Quite the opposite, actually. However, I don't think this discussion should be one-sided. You presented your case, I disagreed, and I'm continuing to engage in dialogue about the focus. Please elaborate on where I'm being argumentative for the sake of arguing and where, precisely, I've been projecting.
     
  12. KIMaster

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    Alt Focus- While I have these photos floating around in an inbox or folder, I don't particularly value them. In fact, I rarely look at them once the relationship, whether purely sexual or not, is over.

    I think that sharing them with others is a scumbag move. Even in those photos where the girl has wisely excluded her face and focused on the naked parts below, these are meant for my eyes only, not those of a random stranger. I think that guys who share these pictures are generally insecure, and want to feel cool and accepted by others by sharing naked pictures of a girl they were with.

    Because honestly, what other reason is there to share naked photos? So some other guy, whether a stranger or a friend, can get his jollies off? No, it's a way to brag.
     
  13. MoreCowbell

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    Most parties I've been to haven't had an explicit "Do not stick your dick in the mashed potatoes" line in the invitation. But nonetheless I generally assume that unless it is indicated that such a thing would be welcome, I probably should avoid creaming up the taters.

    pinkcup is suggesting that sending unsolicited dick shots is the equivalent of tater dick: some rules are just assumed wherever you are, unless otherwise stated. There are things you just don't do.
     
  14. Crown Royal

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    Here's the skinny: guys who send shots of their flesh crank to women on the hopes it will turn them on are cackling morons. What did people not learn from Brett Favre? He was a world-famous celebrity and he sent his pictures to a useless, no-talent ex FSU football slut with bolt-on tits. And by doing that, became a walking joke.

    I said it once, I will say it a billion times: NO WOMAN THAT HAS EVER LIVED WANTS TO LOOK AT A PENIS. Sure, women have private parts too (dozens of them, actually) but their private parts are a lot more private, stored safely away in the secret cavern of the blessed female form. Ours, on the other hand are just plain out there like some hideous prolapsed practical joke and they are not attractive on a scientifically proven-level.
     
  15. Trakiel

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    I think what you mean to say is that no woman that has ever lived wants to look at just a penis. If you go to the Tibette thread and offered to replace all of the pictures posted of the guys they drool over with pictures of those same guys in those (mostly) same poses except completely naked I really doubt anyone would say no. Dick shots, even if contextually not inappropriate, are frankly boring and unimaginitive.

    And I hate that whole "male bodies/genitalia are inherently unattractive" sentiment. Whenever I hear that from someone who isn't a hardcore lesbian my Insecurity Senses start tingling. I just want to pat the guy (and it's always a guy) on the back and reassure him that he doesn't have to try so hard to assert that he's 100% heterosexual and that accepting that the male form has its own aesthetic qualities won't make him gay.
     
  16. MoreCowbell

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    It's pretty much guaranteed that any statement beginning with "No woman ever..." is going to be correct. And that one certainly so.

    We've all seen that episode of Seinfeld. We get it, the dick is "utilitarian."

    While probably not a majority, there are any number of women who do actually enjoy looking at dicks in an aesthetic sense. I know this from having heard them say it themselves, but if you don't believe me, go on tumblr and see how many sex blogs there are both 1) run by women and 2) full of pictures of dick. They may not getting constantly running around saying "COCKS OR GTFO!!!" but these women are out there.
     
  17. scootah

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    Just not true. I call your attention to every bachelorette party to ever hire a stripper. The reaction of the audience when g-strings come off at every male strip review, and the unedited response of every woman the first time she sees a clean, well groomed and exceptionally but not freakishly sized penis belonging to a guy who she is otherwise attracted too, in a non creepy situation.

    Women might not be as tunnel visioned about cock as guys are about tits doesn't change the fact that lots of women like looking at them. It just means that where most guys will enjoy 90% of tits attached to 90% of women regardless of all other factors. Women are slightly more discerning and MUCH more prone to losing interest based on other factors. But plenty of, I'd even say a majority of heterosexual women like looking at cocks, when the cock is worth looking at, and the cock owner doesn't fuck it up.
     
  18. Nicole

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    Mmhm. Pardon the weird analogy, but it's like a restaurant....great food, amazing service. And you go to the bathroom...maybe not every time, but at least once, you'll have to go to the bathroom. If it's ok, you still love the restaurant. If it's a wonderfully clean, cool designed bathroom, you REALLY love the restaurant. If it's a yucky, dirty gross bathroom, you never want to go to the restaurant again, or maybe reluctantly so, despite the good food and great service. And if it's a restaurant you actually haven't been to, and someone sends you photos of the bathroom, you'll look, because you're curious, and because it gives you insight into how good the restaurant is, in case you want to go there sometime.

    It's like that.
     
  19. scootah

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    Great food, great service, and the staff wash their hands somewhere other than the gross bathroom? I don't give a fuck about how feral the bathroom is. I think almost every guy has (or at some point before the local hygiene inspector shut them down, had) a rib or wings place he loves with a feral bathroom that he doesn't give a fuck about.

    I approach tits in much the same way. If they're great in every way except owned by a revolting bush pig/horrible person? Whatever, I'll just appreciate the tits and never go any further. The rampant success of strip bars suggests that many guys have similar feelings on this point. My observation is that girls don't do that shit. Where a female stripper can be terrible in every way, except for amazing tits, and still succeed, male strippers need to be at least acceptable in every way that will be observed by the audience, and no amount of having a giant cock will make up for having bad teeth.
     
  20. Nicole

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    That's the converse theory of my argument...a bad bathroom will ruin the restaurant, no matter how great it is, but a great bathroom won't make up for a lousy restaurant. My analogy is from the female perspective, btw, clearly. Men don't really care about the bathroom's state of affairs, as you mention, at least not enough to avoid the restaurant.

    And again, on point, we (women) are curious what the bathroom looks like...