I can't remember if we've talked abou taking explicit photos and sending them to people before - I'm sure we have - but the Spreadsheet Dating Guy thread brought up an interesting topic. Focus: Do you/have you taken any of "those" pictures? Alt. Focus: What do you do with them? Is it different if it's a FB vs. a girlfriend or long-term SO? What's the appropriate etiquette?
I've shown a couple of half-naked photos to the boys before - it was just a FB and it didn't last long. The ExGF sent me similar sort of pictures (we were together for 3-4 years) but I never showed them to anyone. All photos have since been deleted. I guess if it's a long-term partner that's where I've drawn the line, as opposed to someone I don't really have feelings for. In terms of actually sending copies to anyone, that's a definite no-no for me. There's a difference between showing some friends what your fucking at the time to going onto any sort of website and realising the photos aren't just in your circle of friends.
I think the number one rule for taking "those" pictures is not only to be conscious of the content but also the background. Dirty laundry, cleansers, your cat's kitty litter box, a pile of tampons...I've seen them all (just check the boobie thread). Nothing worse to kill the mood and nothing better for unintentional comedy. Really, I can't believe how some people live. Check out the surroundings of the pics before hitting send. Serioiusly. For the record, sharing is just not cool...ever. Maybe a glimpse to your buddy but to send them around is really really bad. We recently stopped being friends with a guy in our crew because he posted naked pics of his ex on facebook. What a dick.
Focus: I think I posted a few up in the old RMMB threads, and sadly don't have those anymore. But whatever, I am constantly taking them to send to the Boy. I share them with some awesome girlfriends who also have no decency. We're young assholes who like to gawk at each others boobs. We're not hurting anyone. Alt. Focus: Don't be an idiot. Share them with people who fuck you over. Leave your face out of it. Have anonymous accounts on message boards. Try not to leave a trail, show your friends on your own phone, don't send it to them. Also, have fun. Because naked bodies are awesome.
Focus: Yes, but only because I have a sometimes-crippling need for attention and approval, and a modest collection of revealing underwear. Alt-focus: It's like anything else: don't be a dick. Honor the sender's intent. If you get a random ass shot out of the blue from somebody with whom you have no preexisting relationship, show it to whomever you want. If it's somebody who sent it to you with the explicit or implicit caveat that it be kept private, then keep it private. I happen to enjoy receiving racy pictures, and hate that a few assholes ruin it for everyone.
I like the fact that your first thought was about picture taking etiquette and not the second point you listed. Party on. I hardly ever notice the background when titties are in the foreground. When this subject first came up I never thought of the distinction of being shown a buddy's gf/fb/co as a one off and actually having the pics sent to me. I've probably seen two dozen or so but only about a 3rd of them were sent to me and maybe half of of those wasn't from the boyfriend, just obtained by a 3rd party*, the other few were sent post relationship. Out of the ones not sent all of them were just a nudge on the shoulder and a "hey look at this...." Who am I to turn down looking at nudie pics? Of the ones girls have sent me Ive never showed any off and have since lost them to replacing of cell phones and forgetting to save them to new hardware on computers. Ive never taken any shots of my own dong. * This is why I always play it as no matter how private the images are (or should be), treat it as if they'll be public at some point. Phone locks and computer passwords help but beyond that it seems hiding them isn't really ever well thought out. Ive seen some very graphic sex pics a person I know took with his girlfriend that were found when he lent his computer to his roommate over spring break. A simple pic file search turned them up, though they weren't disseminated in any public form. Guy never knew the pics were anything but private. Ow yeah and one of my buddies found a phone left at a bar and turned up some dong shots of the phone's owner. After debating it for a while and drinking some more, he decided to forward the pic to everyone on the phone starting with the number labeled "mom." He can be a dick like that sometimes.
What he said. I am not terribly inhibited, I've been naked a few times for professional shoots and it just doesn't faze me. However, it's still rude to share them unless permission has been granted. Seconded on the background, I have never laughed so hard as when looking at some girl working so hard to show off and all I see is laundry or a filthy bathroom.
Although I agree with you, unfortunetly people don't give a living shit about "permission" if they have no reason to care about you anymore. This is why I would never do this an encourage everyone to do the same. I freaked people out a little while ago on here, but again: if somebody has naked pictures you sent them and you truly scorn them in some way, guess what? Showtime At The Apollo with every friend they have. My friends, DON'T be a fool and think that this is uncommon. It's VERY common because most people are stupid and immature. Some of youse guyz might be more famous than you realize.
I do a fair bit of photography at fetish parties/events and with partners. For the most part I keep all that shit very private and only ever send it out to the people in the photos and let them distribute them as they see fit. From time to time I get permission from someone in the photos to do whatever I want with them (in the case of stuff I've posted in the boobies/booty threads at various times) - but I always make sure to wash any distinguishing features unless the photos are of someone who does professional/semi professional nude photo modelling or something. If I had photos of someone I'd broken up with or something, I'd ask if they objected to me having photos of them - and depending on the photos I'd either just scrub the lot, or if they were photos that I use for art projects / etc - I'd try and negotiate around that point so I could continue using them for that kind of thing. I don't ever expect to get seriously paid for photography - but I've gotten free gig tickets a few times and I've got a gig interstate all expenses paid to shoot an event later in the year. I kind of hope to at least publish a vanity collection or something at some point. So the really great photos, I'd rather not delete if I could avoid it. There are I think naked pictures of me around somewhere from when I was 19 and stupid. I frankly rather hope that the person who had them has long since lost or deleted them and I regret getting drunk in the presence of a camera. Short of a truly miraculous fitness program and some follow up cosmetic surgery - I doubt I'll ever take more. At my absolute best, I'm never going to be a good model for sexy photos - and if they can't be great, I'd rather they just not exist.
Focus: Yes. I was underage/just barely legal (two different sets, same boyfriend) and I sometimes panic about where those things ended up and how many people saw them. Things ended...acrimoniously. I have no doubt that he showed them to some people; I sincerely hope they aren't on the internet somewhere. Alt. Focus: I have a very simple set of rules for this. 1. Did I solicit the pictures? If yes, they stay private. Always. 2. Was I romantically involved with the sender when I received them? If yes, they stay private. Always. 3. Did I agree to keep them private? If yes, they stay private. Always. But woe betide the dude who thinks it's "sexy" or "cute" to send me pics of his cock/semen spurts from various angles when I have a) no warning whatsoever and b) never stated that I desired such a thing. I will forward that shit to everyone (unless they opt out during the pre-dick warning text) and show it at TiB meetups. Weird subfocus: Also, foot fetishists are on my shit list now. I do not want pictures of random feet. Ever. It's kind of funny and not visually jarring like a surprise dick, but it's still creepy and unwanted.
I never got the unsolicited dick pics girls get. I mean are they mainly from dudes your dating/in relations with who decide a dick shot might brighten your day? A guy that you met at the bar and haven't set up the first date with? Is it just a joke because dick jokes are funny? Are they all hung log John Holmes or something? Who's that confident in sending un asked for schlong pics?
I've got plenty of pictures I have received from lovely ladies. They all stay private, because that's what was requested of me. This whole "if it ends poorly, send them around" thing is bullshit. I don't send them around because I gave my word, and I keep my word, regardless of what the other person does or is. I was even tested on that one some time ago when things ended very badly with a girl. We ended up repairing our relationship like a year later and that certainly wouldn't have been possible if I was the type of shithead to send her pictures all around.
Focus: Yes I have and do send pictures of my little buddy and have recieved many pictures as well. I usually only send them by request or if I know they will be well recieved. I have accidentally sent one or two that were well recieved but not intended. Alt Focus: What pretty much everyone is saying, these are meant to be private and under no circumstances should they be sent around. I think it should be understood that at some point someone else may see them (this is how I think about my pics) so its always a good idea to keep your face, identifying marks, out of them. I've kept some of the pictures hidden in an external hard drive under a password but most of them get deleted promptly off of my phone so that I don't have to worry about it. I've never posted them anywhere or sent them to others even if things end badly, to me that's bad form. On the other hand I wouldn't be surprised if my dick pics have been shared. I don't really care as long as they don't get back to my family or close friends.
This. It's amazing how many unsolicited dick pics I get. When I get surprise junk shots they are quickly and viciously critiqued with the girls during work breaks. Between the 4 of us, there's one almost every day. I really don't understand why men do this. They are all exactly the same picture, and your penis is not special. It looks just like all the other cocks we get pictures of, and it is in no way a turn on.
Who are these men in your life and what sort of relationship do you have with them? Because I don't know any guys who would just send random dick pics to a female friend without some sort of pretext. And the fact that it happens so often to you is rather suspect.
I only have received penis pics from men I was sending pictures to, I've had one surprise picture that was unsolicited. It was from a girlfriend who thought it was funny. I'm just lucky I guess.
Being on sites like aff, PoF and fetlife pretty much guarantees a regular stream of surprise pictures in your inbox. It just comes with the territory.
I have to sign on with Crown Royal, a lot of the pics you send out ladies, their friends have seen them quick flashes with their phones at least if this is a relatively new thing, like first 6 months. No one shows stuff once its serious, but I know a ton of naive girls that send pictures thinking the guys NEVER send them. Yeah, good luck there. I don't get the dick pic thing at all. I've sent like a couple in towel topless pictures, because I know girls get off on chests, arms, and abs. I've shown some to friends, but never anything naked, just in underwear ones, and most of the time the face was out of it. I've never kept a file of them anyway, I'm just paranoid of anything getting out and being traced back to me. Pictures don't do much for me so the novelty wears off fast and I delete them.