Adult Content Warning

This community may contain adult content that is not suitable for minors. By closing this dialog box or continuing to navigate this site, you certify that you are 18 years of age and consent to view adult content.

My own Ludovico Technique

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Crown Royal, Aug 9, 2012.

  1. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
    Expand Collapse
    Just call me Topher

    Reputation:
    946
    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2009
    Messages:
    22,659
    Location:
    London, Ontario
    In Stanley Kubrick's classic filmization of A Clockwork Orange, the film's anti-hero Alex undergoes an experimental treatment in prison called "The Ludovico Technique"which is a shock treatment where they pry his eyes open and force him to watch senselessly repellant films of rape and violence, while giving him drugs that make him sick at the sight of the films in order to cure his own violent tendencies. It seems like torture, and it is.

    I have a more simple method for torture: prying someone's eyes open and making them watch something theyabsolutely hate. I guess if they wanted to torture me, about five minutes of this show and I would be begging for perpetual waterboarding done with a battery acid solution:

    A Canadian show about douchebag PUAs bringing down judgement on inexperienced douchebag PUAs. It's like somebody conjured up a living, breathing entity of all that I despise and put it into a nightmarish half hour.

    Focus: If somebody were to torture you with a show or movie, what would they force you to watch to absolutely break you?
     
    #1 Crown Royal, Aug 9, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  2. katokoch

    katokoch
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    477
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,631
    Location:
    Minneapolis
    Anything from the steaming cesspool of programming known as TLC would be cruel, sick punishment for me. I would gouge my eyes out with sticks before I watch a minute of baby shows or Honey Doo-Doo Bear or whatever the name is for the show about the diabetic pageant girl.
     
  3. Misanthropic

    Misanthropic
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    408
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    3,215
    Anything with the word "Real" in the title in particular "The Real Housewives of ________" and of course "The Real World", the shitty MTV show that was at the forefront of the reality TV trend. I want my "Real" MTV back.
     
  4. subgeniuschick

    subgeniuschick
    Expand Collapse
    Experienced Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    Messages:
    165
    Location:
    Canada eh!
    I watched Honey Ding Dong as a self imposed punishment for overindulging in Tequila. Well, in all honesty the remote was at the other end of the couch and didn't think that I couldn't get to it without projectile vomiting (again). Oddly enough, 15 minutes in, I mustered the will to calm my stomach and was able to reach it. About the only thing worse than TLC programming would be being forced to listen to Justin Beiberhop on a never ending loop.
     
  5. Improper

    Improper
    Expand Collapse
    Disturbed

    Reputation:
    129
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    Messages:
    464

    Are you sure they didn't prop open his gluzzies and put on a bit of the old Ludwig van?? Reading that the first time was interesting, to say the least....took me a little bit to automatically translate all of the slang.


    On focus, though, what Katokoch said.
     
  6. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
    Expand Collapse
    Just call me Topher

    Reputation:
    946
    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2009
    Messages:
    22,659
    Location:
    London, Ontario
    I doubt she's diabetic (yet) she probably just eats what the rest of her family eats. I'm guessing a steady and respectably healthy diet of Tang, Pop-Tarts and Moutain Dew. Maybe throw in some strawberry ice cream because y'know, fruit is good for you.
     
  7. downndirty

    downndirty
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    477
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    4,348
    Fox News.

    Seriously.
     
  8. bewildered

    bewildered
    Expand Collapse
    Deeply satisfied pooper

    Reputation:
    1,184
    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2009
    Messages:
    10,910
    Sons of Anarchy.

    It is like a trashy soap opera for men.
     
  9. dewercs

    dewercs
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    170
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    1,262
    Location:
    phoenix, arizona
    I hate Buffy the Vampire Slayer, my wife watches and records it over and over and I delete it over and over, I refuse to be in the same room that piece of shit show is on.
    I am angry just typing about it.
     
  10. mav_ian

    mav_ian
    Expand Collapse
    Experienced Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    216
    Location:
    Victoria, Australia
    Home & Away
    An Aussie soap the ladygirl watches. 7pm each weeknight I GTFO of the lounge room. Apparently once, for some reason it didn't air when she was 8 months pregnant, though I don't remember this day; I've blocked it out of memory...
    It might not mean much to you guys, but among others, but recent Alumni include Chris Hemsworth and Ryan Kwanten.
     
  11. lust4life

    lust4life
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    2,562
    Location:
    Deepinthehearta, TX
    SACRILEGE!!!

    Regis Philbin. Considering he had a TV career that spanned over 50 years, there's enough material to kill me 1000 times over. Regis interviewing Bob Costas or vice versa? Instant death from a massive CVA.
     
  12. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Make me watch anything involving hippies and white people in dreadlocks. I'd kill myself. TV Show wise? Will and Grace, 99% of anything on VH1, especially Jersey Shore.
     
  13. toytoy88

    toytoy88
    Expand Collapse
    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

    Reputation:
    1,264
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    Messages:
    8,763
    Location:
    The fucking desert. I hate the fucking desert.
    Joe Morgan & Tim McCarver broadcasting a baseball game together.

    Between Joe's every third reference being "When I played for The Big Red Machine..." and McCarver's inane prattle I would repeatedly stab myself in the ear with a stick by the second inning.

    Actual Joe Morgan quote: "The only way you're going to beat this team is to score more runs then them."

    As for alternative ways to win a baseball game, Joe didn't provide us with the answer.

    Probable Tim McCarver quote: "See, it's 60 feet 6 inches from the pitcher's rubber to homeplate and 90 feet between each base. Now, when you factor in wind direction, crowd noise and ambient air temperature divided by the surface area of the ball you'll understand why the left fielder is urinating on the fabled ivy here at Wrigley. When I was a rookie in 1961 we were playing in Houston..."

    Of course Joe would interrupt him at this point to say "Hey Tim, I broke in with Houston and then I was traded to The Big Red Machine."
     
  14. Bogan

    Bogan
    Expand Collapse
    Average Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2009
    Messages:
    65
    +1. My mother had their round the clock no spin factor war on terror fucking vitriolic diarrhea on non-stop in the months following 9/11 - and we're in Australia. I would have been 15 or 16 at the time and even then could see throught their bullshit.

    That, or morning TV here. Take your pick of ignorant anchors spouting filth as news, the promotion of useless products, overly flamboyant 'Hollywood correspondents' discussing the finer points of who's fucking who or the plethora of insurance ads for those about to keel over - likely due to elevated blood pressure induce by the sheer mind-numbing idiocy of the programming - and you have my hell.

    Honourable mention to Ghost Whisperer.
     
  15. iczorro

    iczorro
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    107
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    3,541
    Location:
    The Island
    Any show about people's weird habits. Snorting baby powder, having sex with their car, collecting dead raccoons, To Catch a Predator, eating toilet paper, swapping wives for a week, pageants, witchcraft, running a pawn shop, having way too many kids, cleaning out old storage lockers and getting antiques evaluated, and FUCKING REALITY GAMESHOWS.
     
  16. uzisuicide

    uzisuicide
    Expand Collapse
    Disturbed

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    287
    It's already been mentioned, but Will & Grace. The premise of the show is: how many gay/dick jokes can we make in a half hour? Not funny.

    Law & Order-Snooze!

    Also, The Big Bang Theory. A couple of friends, who are actually smart and I value their opinions, told me to give the show a chance. I gave two episodes a good watch. I never even cracked a smile. The show is simply unfunny tripe.
     
  17. effinshenanigans

    effinshenanigans
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    145
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    1,950
    Location:
    CT
    Old Billy Mays infomercials.

    That man couldn't be more obnoxious if he woke me up in the middle of the night with a bullhorn as he drilled through my mattress with his retarded Awesome Auger.
     
  18. subgeniuschick

    subgeniuschick
    Expand Collapse
    Experienced Idiot

    Reputation:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    Messages:
    165
    Location:
    Canada eh!
    A friend wants to have "Movie" night this Friday. They have presented to me, "The Happening" and "Splice".

    Each one alone may not be considered bad enough for aversion therapy, but back to back?



    I feel a summer cold coming on.
     

    Attached Files:

  19. FreeCorps

    FreeCorps
    Expand Collapse
    #1 Internet Boo

    Reputation:
    1
    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2010
    Messages:
    1,785
    Location:
    Boca Raton, FL
    If this is a guy friend you realize he's making the movies bad enough so that you won't want to finish them and will look for something else to do, right?

    I can't stand NCIS. A couple of friends enjoy the show but it makes me feel like scooping out my eyeballs.
     
  20. McSmallstuff

    McSmallstuff
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    2
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Messages:
    1,504
    Seinfeld would do me in within the first three episodes.

    Anything on TLC.

    The grating voice of Rosanne Barr should already be considered torture. God I hated her show.

    And pretty much the entire line up on MTV.

    Anyone of these things could make me kill myself.