MTV's Jersey Shore (was "Jersey without my hair gel")

This episode was great if only for the fact that Vinnie hooked up with Fugly McAnnoying Ab's sister. Awesome watching him go from "Vinnie's got no game and will never do anything with my sister" to "...sonofabitch."

 

Little kids reenact Jersey Shore

This is fucking hilarious. I'm speechless, words cannot fully describe this clip. Watch, NOW!

 

Kubla: as promised. Official Jersey Shore merchandise. Break out the AMX:





...It's raining blood!! Hellelujah!!!

 

Pauly D is spinning at a bar up the street from me on the east side, I'm planning on stopping by. I'm not sure if it will be all yuppies, all guidos, or a combination. I'm definitely bringing my camera.

 

Yeah, because who wouldn't want to hunt her fine ass down?

 

...I would, for one, if she did was she was supposed to do namely: shut that idiot sewer of a mouth of hers the fuck up, and never again speak for the rest of her life (although her bolt-on's also speak for themselves).

...I think that message on her ass is supposed to be taken seriously, though. With her mileage she probably wouldn't know that answer to that question on most occasions.

 

I need a bet settled. I have told a friend countless times that Sammi is a manipulative whore of the worst kind. He maintains that she is simply whiny and immature and nothing she has done makes her seem manipulative.

What's the verdict? Complete manipulative bitch who will ultimately ruin Ronnie's life or whiny girl who is just as much the victim as Ronnie is?

 

As we first reported, MTV offered each cast member a $10,000 signing bonus and $5,000 per episode. We're told the cast rejected the offer and made it clear they would all stand together and hold out for their price, though they didn't say what it was. MTV made a new offer of $10,000 an episode -- there are 12 episodes in the new season -- but so far the cast hasn't responded. We're told MTV already has replacements if Snooki, Pauly D, The Situation and the others don't accept the offer on Monday. But, we're told, MTV is happy to mix and match if some of the cast accepts the offer and other don't. As for who's being the most hard-headed in the negotiations -- The Situation and Pauly D."

This is from TMZ.com.

10k does not seem like a big deal for how incredibly and notoriously popular they are right now. The idiots on the Hills get paid way more than that,

I'm not sure I will even watch this show next year, I absolutely will NOT watch it if it's a new cast. The one thing that I credit MTV with is actually showing the cast as people, I actually was able to look past Pauly D's ridiculous douche bag blowout and say "he might not be such a bad guy." If they replace them with even douchier looking guy's I'm out.

 

Like any cheap, primitive circus act, they're easy to replace, despite their popularity. 5k an episode is insultingly low considering how much they make for the network, but if they have effective replacements, they might just have to swallow the 10k offer.

I haven't watched the show at all this season besides Youtube clips of the fights, and reading this topic, but honestly, what the fuck difference if it's the same 7 clowns as before, or a pack of new ones?

 

Bill Simmons did a whole podcast dedicated to recapping the whole series, it's on espn.com and I assume iTunes (for free). It's hilarious. He also did one about the first week of the series right after that one came out.

 

I saw that a couple of days ago, but couldn't get more than 8 minutes into it before closing the window, as his guest annoyed the shit out of me. Does it get better and funnier after that? Is the pain worth the entertainment at the end of tunnel?

 

The first 7 minutes of it was them talking about Sundance which I had no interest in, so I would say it gets way better. It's not as hilarious as their first podcast but they talk about the characters, how they think it will evolve if they do another season, etc.

 

You have to keep Pauly D if you keep the Situation. They played off each other too well and Pauly had some of the most geniunely ridiculous lines, whereas you could see the Situation conciously trying to put something together. I think a good start to Season 2 would be tossing Sammie from a bridge onto the Jersey Turnpike on the way to the Shore.

 

Yeah, I'm sure that it's hard to find eight identical dipshits in that state. Like trying to find a needle in a needle stack. Wouldn't it be better to just suffer though some new blood that are even bigger twats than the ding-dongs from season one? Even 5k an episode will get you a lot of pommade and Sea-Doo fuel, and I'm sure they'll have plenty of takers.

...I have no idea what you're talking about...

 

I expected a new cast for season 2, but I will genuinely be upset when Pauly D is not in it.

 

The only thing I'm curious about is how the whole show dynamic will work if everyone knows each other. The reason these types of shows work out is because it's all awkward and everyone tests out each other's limits all season, until the very end when everyone pretends they're "solid." Now that the Jersey Shore cast is all pretend-BFF, will we get a whole season of throwing people under the bus?

I just hope they come back for a second season so JWoww can finally give Sammi the beatdown she deserves.

 

One of the things Simmons mentioned on his podcast I had to agree with was the unfamiliarity of the whole thing for the outsiders watching. They just saw TV cameras rolling, but didn't know what for. Now, should they go back to the Shore, whether with the original cast or a new one, every Gorilla Juicehead and Queen of the Guidettes is going to know what's going on and find someway to get on the show, or knock one of the motherfuckers out. Just how like now, the Real World cast is always getting harassed -- ok, mostly the tool bag dipshits from Austin and whatnot -- but it will still most likely end up the same scenario, in my opinion.

One of the ideas they tossed around in the podcast (I am pretty sure it was Simmons' guest) was of taking these "fish out of their water" and putting them somewhere else; Aspen, Beverly Hills, etc and seeing them in action there. I think that would be far more hilarious than trying to basically recreate this years show on the shore.

 

FUCK YES. JWoww seems like she has a soft heart (remember her lying to Snickers and saying that the bitch at the bar had called all of them fat?) but I would love to see Sammi try to pull her princess routine on JWoww and get supremely disrespected. Also, on the reunion show it seemed like Sammi has some insecurities about JWoww's extreme fuckability--and now that Ron-Ron is single, I know he's going to try to fuck JWoww in order to make Sammi feel like shit. AWESOME. Please please please, God....I want to watch her cry and shake her clip-on hair in Ronnie's face as JWoww smokes a cigarette and doesn't give a fuck.

As far as the "original cast" goes, though--why not just 86 that Angelina chick and replace her with Mike's sister?