I was quite surprised with the rave reviews that District 9 received. I really, REALLY hated that movie. The main reasons of my hatred were the plot holes throughout the movie, centered around the aliens. Why in the fuck did they exchange their weapons for cat food? Why did they never retaliate? How is it possible that an advanced species ran out of fuel and let humans herd them into a camp? There are others that I am forgetting, but I found this film unbearable to watch.
You're, of course, entitled to your opinion. But go back and watch the fucking movie. They specifically state that they think all the refugees are worker class who aren't capable of organising themselves and relegated to a caste system. The smart ones, by extension, are hiding amongst the dumbasses because they don't have the numbers.
I was telling Wife™ about this thread and she suggested that I mention Eyes Wide Shut. I'd completely forgotten about that piece of garbage. Slow, uninteresting and ultimately boring. Yes, it's Kubrick's last film. So? Why should I accept mediocrity because the man died after he directed it? If people are going to fellate Stanley Kubrick, do so because of 2001 or A Clockwork Orange. And the score. That goddamn piano. Made me want to mute the TV and get by on subtitles.
I'll say it before, I'll say it forever: Armageddon. Fuck you once again, Michael Bay. Two and a half hours of poorly acted over-produced rah-rah horseshit. This movie couldn't suck worse if it tried, and was the number one draw at the box office that year. Big fucking surprise.
Dude that movie was awesome. It's everything you could ask for in a mindless action-adventure movie. USA USA USA!!
I can't tell if that's sarcasm or not, but you know what? Almost every male I know, be he genius or moron, knows the movie by heart. Nobody actually thinks it's good. It just...needs to be watched. It's like The Notebook for men. They hand you a copy when they issue you a dick.
I watched it once. I will not watch it again, even on threat of death. I'll choose death. Between the non-stop mindless noise and Liv Tyler's teary-eyed suckerfish looks, it's just a migraine of a film for me. Like I said before, it's a 2.5 hour long movie trailer/Aerosmith video. At least they killed off Owen Wilson early in it, they would have done us a huge favour if it was ditto for Affleck. Peter Stormare is the one and ONLY saving grace (like he is in every single thing he appears in). Does anybody besides me think he has a slight resemblence to Bruce Willis? Ever since I saw Fargo I thought that. Speaking of Aerosmith, that fucking song they made for this movie also licks sweaty taint. I can't believe with their catalogue of awesome rock tunes that sappy ear-splitting ballad in their only #1 hit.
You hate The Big Lebowski. Clearly, sir, you are an outlier. Also, the first person to list The Shawshank Redemption just to be a contrarian is going to get a midnight visit and a punch to their babyjuice eggs. That aggression will not stand, man.
The first 20-30 minutes of Armageddon are moderately entertaining. There is some humor and light-hearted fun. The last 90 minutes are overwrought, junior high emotional melisma mixed with constant idiocy, and a lack of sense or even basic continuity. In fact, this review sums it up quite well.
I mean, the minute a plot description includes the sentence, "And then they land the space shuttles on the asteroid and prepare to bury the nuclear warhead..." you really have to throw out whatever hopes you had for a film grounded in anything resembling an acceptable reality. At that point, you just need to sit back, enjoy it, and when something stupid happens, chuckle to yourself and think, "Oh yeah, it's Michael Bay." After that, the rest is cream cheese. We really could do a whole thread on Armageddon alone. It's that discussable. EDIT: Fuck it, I'm starting it.
FOCUS: Now is your chance, sound off on the films that everyone talks and raves about yet they leave you empty. The Road. What a horrible movie. It's ultra slow paced, no climax, and just boring. Everything revolves around gloom and suicide as the only option for adversity. I never felt there was even any character build-up. It's just, oh no, we're in trouble lets hide like wusses and if we are close to getting caught we'll just off ourselves. It's generally gotten good reviews, a few film nominations and a few of my friends liked it but I just cannot see what's good about it.
What you've stated as negatives are pretty much the point of it. The characters aren't called "man" and "boy" for no reason. The lack of character build-up isn't there for no reason. They're everyman and everyboy. It's about their interaction, not who they are. Just my opinion of course, but it's a story about ultimate futility and how we conduct ourselves in the face of impending entropy... with a possible upbeat turning at the end to stave off a few suicides by the more impressionable literatis. Don't hate on a movie by citing a proclaimed lack of something as technical fault when the very lack of that thing is an integral part of the story.
I PMed this, but as a historian with a love of cinema I will dispel many myths right here. (Anything more I will reply to tomorrow) I was going to write this as a neg rep, but it was too long. "I have given out few reds in the history of the board. Very few. But this post reminds me of a girl I dated I showed Casablanca. She bitched" This movie is full of cliches" Unfortunately so few people realize, the cliches we know were spawned from this movie. Detach yourself from modern cinema and realise that the movie inspired more than you know, any you will love this movie" The concept of the love story in hollywood came from this movie. I hate sappy movies, because of the plot holes. But this one rings true. While they were filming this movie there was a military push to capture the city in Morocco. They had to try their best to figure out what was going to happen in the most confusing days of the war, and had no idea how to end it until the last bit of filming. This movie's last scenes were filmed as the Germans were marching into the real Casablanca, so the ending would ring true with the audience of the WWII era. The "beautiful relationship" they had started meant they understood that they were walking into a firing squad. The gun running american and the corrupt French cop who wasn't working for the Vichy french knew that they were going to be executed. . There was no place to run and hide. The fog they walked into was the ether of the other plain of existance. They accepted their fate because they knew they were each doing what was right for the greater good of the WWII effort. Saving Laslo, and getting him to America to inspire other rebellion movements. . Casablanca is a movie that you have to watch detaching yourself from modern film, and understanding the underlying themes that are so god damn subtle in the movie that they are hard to catch. But for the audience of 1942, it really made it much more powerful.
Really, this isn't the topic for having in-depth discussions, as the focus is for people to give certain choices, a reason, and leave it at that. Granted, I did this a bit myself earlier in the topic, but that was because I was stupid and had this confused for the "Old Movie Review Thread". Mods do as you wish, but here was my response (I was a little annoyed, since I hate long-ass private messages in response to posts the person didn't even read); Firstly, it's clear you didn't bother reading my complete review. However, do yourself a favor and read this brilliant article by Umberto Eco about the film, one of the greatest writers of the 20th century. He addresses many of the things you bring up more neatly than I ever could. Secondly, historical revisionism aside, what you wrote above is false. In fact, there are many cliches in Casablanca which a viewer in 1942 would instantly recognize, but which are largely unnoticed by modern audiences. For instance, the trusty black piano player, the police superintendent with the pointy mustache, or the French whore proudly singing La Marseillaise. (the latter noted by Eco) Again, this is wrong, and something I mentioned in my review. Watch "Gone with the Wind", "It Happened one night", or even something like "The Philadelphia Story" (which I don't even like overall), all of which predated Casablanca, were equally/more successful, and were much better depictions of a love story. They're not just plot holes, which would be partially forgivable. They're plot holes without which the plot wouldn't progress, and there would be no movie. If Rick stays true to his established personality and doesn't accept the dangerous visas (the guy who "doesn't stick out his neck for no one") from a small-time criminal he despises, there is no "Casablanca". Period. What part rang true to you? The one where characters violate their established personalities on the whims of a plot? The one where a German commander drives completely alone to an abandoned airstrip? And once he is killed, his close collaborator and buddy protects a man he clearly dislikes? Oh, and none of the Germans there get the bright idea that with two men surrounding a dead body on an abandoned field, one of them is the murder? Don't even get me started on the idiocy of the central love story, the German colonel's alternating hands off/hands on policy towards Viktor Lazlo, also based on what the plot needs to have occur. I could go on all day. Just curious, but did you really like Titanic, too? That one is actually better in many ways. I'm glad you romanticized it that way in your head. However, it has absolutely nothing to do with the quality of the film. Especially considering the "walking into firing squad" motif would have been far more easily established with Rick being executed for his crime at the end, the logical and natural conclusion to the story. That's nonsense. Casablanca is about as subtle as a hammer blow to the face. And I have seen lots of excellent classic films from both the 30s and 40s that in no way require any sort of "detachment". I don't mind you disagreeing with me, but at least read my review before banging out a PM, or mentioning a red dot, as if I gave a shit. Oh, and tell that ex-girlfriend who disliked Casablanca, from me, that she has good taste and is realistic and rational.
I hesitated in entering this thread, cause I knew some of my favorite movies would be shat upon. Eh, but each to his own I guess. Focus THE CROW Hooooly shit this was bad. I mean hilariously bad. I was expecting a epic masterpiece only to get another cheesy hit and miss action film. I was laughing at almost every scene. Shaky camera work, unnecessary actions and slow mo shots. If Brandon Lee didn't die this movie wouldn't nearly be as famous. If you're looking for a few laughs look no further
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: I don't watch karate movies because I want to see the nuanced performances of Asian actors. I go to karate movies because I want to see butterheads beat the shit out of each other. Nothing against butterheads, I'm married to one, but still, this movie sucks. This movie does have its kick ass moments where butterheads beat the fuck out of other butterheads, but what I hate about this movie is that it introduced the pretentious art house crowd to karate films, and they saw this movie as being "revolutionary" because butterheads were flying on wires and shit. Thing is, BUTTERHEADS HAVE BEEN FUCKING FLYING ON WIRES FOR YEARS AND YEARS. But no, throw in Ang Lee and suddenly it's the darling of the art house indie circuit, and all my pretentious friends are like "it's so beautiful, like a haiku poem." I'm all like: "I hate you because you never saw Iron Monkey or Drunken Master and you believe Ang Lee invented flying butterheads." Fuck this movie.
Donnie Darko. Another movie that felt like a chore to sit through. I'm tired of people going on and on about hidden messages and how deep the movie is. It's not. It's fucked up for the sake of being fucked up and it's overrated and boring.
Jesus christ, if you are gonna use a slang, derogatory, racist term, at least pick one that accurately describes the race you're talking about. Butterhead is slang for black people, jackass. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=butterhead
I fully agree, this movies has to be one of the worst. I cannot stand what a pussy the guy is. Come on, how desperate is he. And her. You nailed it, whiny bitch. All i can say is every chick flick is the same, girls nails someone else, everyone feels bad for her. IE How to Make an American Quilt (bunch of women telling an engaged chick, cheating is ok) bridges of madison county (Dad takes kids to baseball game, wife bangs painter)
At first, I thought this movie was above-average funny. A few weeks later, after listening to everyone I talked to or saw on TV, trump it up as "the funniest movie I've ever seen", I began to resent it. That movie is The Hangover. This was not a bad movie, but everytime I mentioned something about, arguably, the funniest movie ever (Step Brothers), some asshole chimes in with "I've never seen that, but I bets it's not as funny as The Hangover!" Fuck you! It is funnier! Honestly, if Zach Galifinakis wasn't in The Hangover, it would have been less than mediocre. Let the red dots fly, fuckers!