Pauly Shore: I think 2 hours of "Hey Buuuuuuuuuuuuuddy" as he hangs upside down is just what the franchise needs. Ellen Degeneres: She could easily pass for a young boy with minimal make-up, perhaps a different hair color. She could also do a stupid dance after every criminal was caught. Even the cops could join in! Alvin [the chipmunk]: Two words: In 3D!
DJ Qualls, you may know him from Road Trip or any number of other roles he's played, he's got gangly down to a science
The-the-the-the spider bite yeh // can only make me stronger // I throw web shit in your face now // so yo cant steal much longer
Maybe I'm alone here, but I think Michael Cera would be a very good Spiderman. I remember reading the original series sometime in the mid-late 70's, actually probably late 70's and early 80's, and I think the idea behind Spiderman is that Peter Parker was basically a gigantic nerd that had this event happen to him and part of the appeal is how a 'normal' everyday nerd dealt with being somewhat superhuman. The movies, as well as subsequent incarnations of Spider Man, definitely toughened the character up. I'm not saying I don't enjoy the newer take on him, but I think it's like "The Dark Knight" - which is a vast departure from the original character - who is more like the Michael Keaton version. Maybe I'm remembering it wrong, but frankly Michael Cera strikes me a whole lot more as Spiderman than Tobey Macguire, though I thought he did a great job. The other ones on the list are way too 'boy band pretty' for the character as I remember it.
Cera would work if he was unknown - his typecast role is pretty much exactly what Spiderman was.. at the beginning. But now he's too known as the shy awkward teenager, whats the point of adding another role that wont stand out at all for what Cera plays.
Alt. Focus: Who would be hilarious to see cast as Spiderman? Even though the above 'serious' list takes most of our jabs from us.. Pauly Shore would nail it!
Huh? Isn't that exactly what you would expect to see for Spiderman? Looking kind of like a bitch is kind of a pre-requisite. They have to be believable as Parker. Didn't know 6 of the nine actors, so I have a hard time making fun of them. Most of them looked either too effeminate to be a superhero, or too much of a Hollywood pretty boy or macho man to be Peter Parker. It's sort of a tough balance. On looks alone, the first and third guys might be able to pull it off. Efron is too pretty to sell as Peter Parker, Cera couldn't be believable as the Spiderman half of the role (he would nail Parker though. It's right up his alley). Radcliffe might be able to pull it off, but I think he's too...British. Parker needs to be a pure American whitebread type. I nominate Paul Dano of Little Miss Sunshine and There Will Be Blood. He could be perfect for this role. Emile Hirsch (Girl Next Door, Into Thin Air) would be another good choice. Patrick Fugit (Almost Famous) seems to have fallen off the face of the Earth. What about him? He's too old now, but Darko-era Jake Gyllenhall would have fit the mold.
On a bit of a derailing note, Has anyone else noticed that Cancer Man from the Xfiles looks like a decrepit Michael Cera:
They are both Canadian. I feel fucking ancient too. Other than Cera and Harry Potter, I only somewhat recognize Efron and that's by name only. I'm a former comic book nerd and yes, Parker was nerdy and awkward in the high school years but I can't see Cera in an action movie. Maybe Kevin Mchale (Artie from Glee) would not be too bad. He can look like a geek but still has an air of normal about him. If you remember the first movie, Peter bulked up a bit once the spider powers took over.
"You know I-uh- actually shoot this really sticky web from my wrists, sometimesIsavepeople like hot girls. It's a good time <sheepish laugh>." Watch Adventureland, this is really the way he talks. Despite that, I like him a lot more than Michael Cera. He was cast as Mark Zuckerberg in a movie about the founding of Facebook. I think he's going to do really well in that role.
Just look at this fucking guy. He looks like he chugs cock for sport. I think Jason Mewes would be the perfect spiderman, as long as he acts exactly like he does when he plays Jay.
Nicholas Cage. He can do anything. Proof: <a class="postlink" href="http://niccageaseveryone.blogspot.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://niccageaseveryone.blogspot.com/</a>
Hey Toby, I'm really happy for you and all, and Imma gonna let you finish, but everyone knows I'd be the best Spiderman.
Am I the only one who thinks Yelchin may be the best choice out of that list ? Yes, that newish Terminator sucked in the poll of public opinion (because there was no Ahhhh-nold - I haven't seen it so I can't comment further on it), but Yelchin CAN act a bit - watch a few episodes of Huff for proof. I think Radcliffe is unsuitable more for his stature - he is NOT tall and gangly. If they're looking at other Harry Potter cast members, Matthew Lewis (Neville) would be a better choice, but is unknown as a lead. I'm pretty sure it won't be Efron - he'll be too expensive.