Halloween is tomorrow. If you have the compulsion to go trick-or-treating as an adult, you might consider getting a cat scan. However one universal truth remains in that the left over candy will be eaten. Whether its from the lack of trick-or-treaters or because you confiscated your kids' candy out of 'safety', it gets pecked away at over the subsequent days. So that leaves the ultimate question... what is unquestionably the best Halloween candy? For me it is and has always been Reeses Peanut Butter Cups. Those things go right into the freezer and I horde them like a vicious troll. Starburst blows hobos for quarters. Focus: Halloween Candy.
The little Snickers bars. Also in the freezer for a day or two so when you eat one you have to gnaw on it like a dog with a chew toy.
Reese's cups for me, as well. I'll eat just about anything chocolate. I'd starve before I ate any gummy or taffy type candies. We're dressing our 3 month old son as a skeleton and parading him in around, just to get us some candy. He even has skull and cross-bone diapers.
Fuck you all. Halloween isn't big in Aus but I destroy packets of Starburst lollies like they're the last thing on earth. I don't buy them anymore because once I open a packet it's gone in five minutes.
God yes. So much delicious. I once pulled a Ghomeshi* on my sister trying to get her last Jersey Milk. *I am totally making this a thing. To "pull a Ghomeshi" is to beat an unwilling someone to the point of tears.
I definitely love Reese's cups the best. (Side note: if you say Reesy cup or Rees eez cups, you're dead to me. The man's name was HB Reese. They're his cups. Thus, Reese's cups. His name was not Mr. Reesie or Reesy or any other retarded version that gets you to that stupid pronunciation besides the possessive of Reese.) But, as a kid, I really enjoyed getting hopped up on Zots. I hardly ever had them during the year, and kinda seemed like just an awesome Halloween special.
We're all in agreement that candy corn is last and people who give it out should be shot on the spot?
Reese Pieces and the smallMars orMilky Ways were my favourites. I come from the Paramoia Era where every stupid parent thought everything was poison and packed with razor blades. So they throw out the only healthy item -- the apple-- and let the kid feast on the pillowcase filled with processed sugar and corn syrup.
I was precocious and liked coconut before any of the other kids realized it was delicious, so I got to trade all of my garbage candy (gum balls, banana laffy taffy, bottle caps, etc) away for my friends' delicious almond joys and mounds bars. Clearly on halloween, anything with chocolate > anything without chocolate. I also love butterfingers, but they're my mom's favorite, so she would always steal them out of my candy stash.
Multiple stashes were/are a necessity. I'll have some mini butterfingers, please, and all the malted milk balls in your house. Love Reese's cups too. I'm not going to be around my apartment for Trick or Treaters but will still buy candy because I'm an adult and I can do what I want.
See, I justify my candy purchases as being "for the kids" when in reality, we get MAYBE 5 trick-or-treaters because we live in the student ghetto in a shitty town and no one in their right mind should let children walk around at night by themselves here. I also buy candy every month to take to the kids on my caseload at home visits, which is heavily influenced by what candy I want to be eating on any given day. This month it was Reese's pumpkins, which were such a big hit with the kiddies that I only had like 2 left for myself, which was disappointing.
I am going to speak out for those of us who aren't in love with chocolate and would rather have PURE UNADULTERED SUGAR. So, yes, I am speaking of Skittles. Anything else pales in comparison. So when I pick up candy to pass out to the kids and don't want to be tempted, it's all Snickers, Paydays, Milky Ways, etc. Completely safe with me.
I would actually prefer that every single piece of candy collected that night should be Reese's Cups. I like Smarties but apparently they are seen as one of the worst Halloween candies?
The only candy that still tastes the same to me as it did 25 years ago. It might even be better now. I could eat a pound of this stuff in a sitting. Not many trick or treaters around here anymore. Mostly newly retired people and gay couples. So that bag of Hershey's miniatures is all mine. Mr. Goodbar, you fell ignominiously from your esteemed place in the candy hierarchy, but I will eat you indiscriminately with Krackle, the bastard Crunch bar. The only problem with these things is one isn't enough. So, you have another, and another. Then half the bag is gone and your big toe is swollen and you can't see properly out of one eye.
Kit-Kat bars and Twix. I essentially aim for chocolate whenever possible. I fucking hate candy corn. It's awful, you put it in your mouth and it feels all ashy and rough, and it just tastes like really fucked-up sugar.
Tonight at 11 - A Special Report on how the gays are ruining Halloween Sponsored by the westboro Baptist Church A coworker has bowl of loose candy corn outside her cubicle so folks can help themselves to a handful. Having witnessed other co-workers walk out of a bathroom stall and out the bathroom door without so much as pausing to glance at the sink, I've chosen to pass on the candy corn. Myself, I prefer chocolate - any variety of Hershey's miniatures, especially the dark chocolate.
I grabbed a bag of mini chewy sweet tarts the other day in the store. Dam things are amazing. I agree about Smarties, under appreciated for sure.
Put your peanut butter on my chocolate I just assumed everybody did that. I had my pumpkin bucket for show and the paper bag under my costume where I kept the good stuff. I vividly remember plopping my bucket on the counter after coming home and having my mom say something like "Gee, you didn't get very much this year. Huhn, and most of it has nuts." Because of course all the good stuff was in the bag in my room. Also, if peanut butter M&M's had been a thing, I would've weighed 700 lbs as a 5th grader. Damn, I would cut a bitch for peanut butter M&M's.