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Life's Mysteries

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by DrFrylock, Jun 20, 2011.

  1. DrFrylock

    DrFrylock
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    The White

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    Driving on the freeway on Friday somebody drove right up behind me flashing his (or her) lights at me and shit. I got all flustered because it was heavy traffic and moving just too fast to maneuver. I finally got over and the person passed me honking. I did not recognize the car. I pulled off the road to see if a tail light was out or if I were dragging a dead animal: nothing. It is a mystery.

    FOCUS: Tell us about the little unsolved mysteries in your life.
     
  2. dubyu tee eff

    dubyu tee eff
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    Thinks he has a chance with Christina Hendricks...

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    What the fuck are those two little black dots that are everywhere I look, but when I try to get a look at them, they quickly dart away?!?!?!
     
  3. AlmostGaunt

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    The blur is the result of debris from the vitreous casting a shadow on the retina. The spot is the image formed by a deposit of protein drifting about in the vitreous, the clear jelly-like substance that fills the middle of the eye.

    Yeah, it's a slow day at work...
     
  4. Blue Dog

    Blue Dog
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    Absentee Mod

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    I'll never for the life of me be able to figure out why melted ice tastes so much better than just regular water. Whats that? You say they taste the same? HORSESHIT. Go and make yourself a glass of ice water, and drink it down. Then, set the glass aside and drink it later when the ice is halfway melted.

    It tastes different, doesn't it? And I don't know why, but I love that shit.
     
  5. Juice

    Juice
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    Moderately Gender Fluid

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    -Why did my parents tell me that not wearing enough clothing would cause pneumonia? Do they not know how that works?

    -Who the fuck is Lomax and why does he keep calling me in the middle of the night?

    -Where did my dear Mutsy go when I lost him as a boy?

    [​IMG]
     
  6. Wadget

    Wadget
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    Didn't we do this before?
     
    #6 Wadget, Jun 20, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  7. Seeker

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    Disturbed

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    Just to get it out of the way: you're clearly not as bright and capable as you think, since you ended up where you did. Occam's Razor ftw.

    Focus: Why does a dog that just had stomach surgery insist on trying to lick her giant still-healing incision?
     
  8. walt

    walt
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    Where were these women when I was single ?
     
  9. kuhjäger

    kuhjäger
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    Why is is that occasionally when I have a do or die shit, I can manage to hold it, and then hours later, I don't have to shit any more?

    My theory:

    There are shits that teleport from person to person, intestine to intestine looking for an exit, and if you don't release the shit, it moves on to the next person, trying to find an escape.

    Ever been midway through a normal shit, and suddenly your asshole opens up and unleashes hell, and is then back to normal? You happened to be on the toilet at the right time for a teleport shit.
     
  10. effinshenanigans

    effinshenanigans
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    Where were these hot, horny teachers when I was in high school?
     
  11. audreymonroe

    audreymonroe
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    The most powerful cervix... in the world...

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    I don't think this qualifies as a "little" mystery, but I am convinced that my friend and I were sucked into an alternate dimension in New Jersey when we were in high school. We got lost and had no idea how and called our dads and neither of them could find anything about the town we were in or any of the roads we could see on the internet or maps or anything. We eventually made it back to New York, but to this day I wonder where the hell we were and how we got there.
     
  12. Now Slappy

    Now Slappy
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    Here ya go Audrey http://www.weirdnj.com/, this may expain some things for you...or maybe not, but interesting none the less.
     
  13. Frank

    Frank
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    Why do I always wake up dehydrated no matter how much beer I drink?
     
  14. Juice

    Juice
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    Why did my cat take a shit right next to his litter box last night?

    Why does the German version of Santa Claus put the bad children in a sack and beat them with a stick instead of giving them coal?

    Why does my female neighbor not shave her armpits?
     
  15. lust4life

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  16. Dmix3

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  17. lostalldoubt86

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    Where did all my clothes from high school go? I've searched all over my parents house and they are not there. My mom did not give them away. My sister did not steal them. All I know is, I went to college and they all disappeared.
     
  18. bewildered

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    Where did my razor go?

    It stays in the bathroom. The bathroom is clean and uncluttered. It has vanished and I am using razor heads with no handle.
     
  19. PIMPTRESS

    PIMPTRESS
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    Why do people think it's acceptable to type in their ebonic-like gibberish?
     
  20. JC62

    JC62
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    #20 JC62, Jun 20, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015