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I'd Fuck Me

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Angel_1756, Sep 27, 2013.

  1. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Fuck Marry Kill: TiB Edition.

    The rules are simple - who, from TiB would you fuck, who would you marry, who would you kill? One selection per category and all categories must be covered. Justifications are welcome but not required.
     
  2. shegirl

    shegirl
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    Redemption Seeking Whore

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    It's been a while so why not. I bend easily.
     
  3. mya

    mya
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    I feel like Angel needs to go first
     
  4. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    As in answer first, or you'd kill me first?

    Fuck: Pimptress.
    Marry: Noland.
    Kill: Dixie.
     
  5. Juice

    Juice
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    I'd kill Milly then Id fuck him.
     
  6. mya

    mya
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    As in answer, no way that you'd be in the kill column. I'd have to carefully consider which of the other options would be better....on the one hand you are a successful asian with an eye for detail, musical talent, and a tiger mom who taught you how to clean, cook, and iron. On the other, boobies and kink!
     
  7. Noland

    Noland
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    Fuck: shegirl (I have to know.)
    Marry: Angel (Fair is fair)
    Kill: Durbanite (Sorry, Dude, you gotta go.)
     
  8. MoreCowbell

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    If none of you fuck me, I'll kill you all.
     
  9. lhprop1

    lhprop1
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    C'mon, Ballsack. Take one for the team.
     
  10. Rush-O-Matic

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    I'd just like to say that I love that three women are the first to participate in this thread, and Juice chose to both break the rule stated in the focus and choose a random internet dude for the game.

    How does the game work, though? Are you assuming that you don't also get to fuck whom you marry? Or in Juice's case, fuck who you kill? And, does it have to be that order? Or, can I marry Nom first and then still get to fuck Chater and kill Google Adsense [Bot]?
     
  11. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

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    I will fuck you to death.

    Not metaphorically. I mean I will repeatedly jam my cock into your hungry asshole until your entire being explodes into a fine fuck mist.

    Then I'm going to wipe it up with a paper towel, wrap that towel around some delicious prosciutto, then mail that entire package to your closest aunt.

    Then maybe a nap.
     
  12. MoreCowbell

    MoreCowbell
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    [​IMG]
     
  13. VanillaGorilla

    VanillaGorilla
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    Fuck- Pussy Galore. She's southern and has always been friendly so I feel a lot less like a mouth breathing weirdo to say so.

    Marry- DeltaBelle. Anybody remember her? We've been dating IRL for damn near six years, so yeah.

    Kill- Crown. In the most hyperbole filled way I could think of. Like, a horse would literally fist him to death while a pack of rabid zombie Marmots ate his face. It would be a LITERAL homage to his contributions to the board. And I'd make sure it happened in Canada so I could be all like "Why's your country so violent and filled with rapey fist horses and rabid zombie Marmots? This is totally a reflection of Canada as a whole."
     
  14. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    Fuck - Angel. Crazy drunk. The end.

    Marry - TweetyBird or whatever her name is. I was mentally running through the names of females and she's the first relatively sane one I came across.

    Kill - Dixie. I was mentally running through the names of people who should be locked up and he's the first name I came up with.
     
  15. VanillaGorilla

    VanillaGorilla
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    Oh, and in all fairness, DCC most likely did all three to Nett Daddy.
     
  16. Puffman

    Puffman
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    Fuck: Queen Bee. I am too old to be going after you youngsters. I need to go after someone who could challenge me. Or give me CPR.

    Marry: Annabanna. She has always intrigued me.

    Kill: Lust 4 Life. Sorry dude you are the nearest direct competitor to me. Besides with our health issues, it just might be a mercy killing.
     
  17. tweetybird

    tweetybird
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    Experienced Idiot

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    You rang?

    This is actually the first time anyone has named me for one of these name-a-member polls in my 7 combined years of timewasting aka TMMB/RMMB/TiB membership. I would be lying like a rug if I didn't admit I'm preening ever so slightly.

    On to business:

    Fuck: katokoch. He and his girlfriend seem very happy, but perhaps she would let me borrow him.

    Marry: MoreCowbell. Cause he kind of reminds me of my actual husband, including the not quite inappropriately younger than me part.

    Kill: the only person who has ever been truly out of line to me in all those 7 years is KIMaster, but I fear he doesn't count. OH. Stealth. Hands down. Creepy fuck.
     
  18. iczorro

    iczorro
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    Fuck: Roxanne. Her Catwoman costume made me feel funny in my no-no parts.

    Marry: Shimmered. She puts forth the "mostly together but still edgy" vibe that I dig. Plus, that booty is solid gold.

    Kill: Ballsack. I'm coming to realize that the overblown racist stereotypes he spouts aren't actually a joke, and it would be more of a mercy killing than anything.
     
  19. Parker

    Parker
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    Fuck: Mindy. She was hot, asian, and posted pics on the board. I also have no information to anything as to what her personality is like, because she didn't talk much.

    Marry: Roxanne, just so the fuck isn't a one time thing. I think we all know why. Bartending skills, catsuit, amazing body, Persian so she tans wonderfully.

    Kill:
    Ballsack - Repeats himself too much and the racism isn't funny.
    Durbanite: No one gives a shit about South Africa.
    Crown: He's 100 years old and hates everything new/fancy.
    Stealth: Posts terrible porn links and thinks advertising is trying to kill him.
     
  20. lust4life

    lust4life
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    Fuck: Roxanne.
    Marry: Bewildered.
    Kill: Dixie (I'd sacrifice my sobriety, get drunk and run him over).

    And if Puffman got to me, I'd come back and haunt Crown, but only when he's stoned.