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I dub him Jermajesty

Discussion in 'All-Star Threads' started by effinshenanigans, Dec 9, 2009.

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  1. effinshenanigans

    effinshenanigans
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    I always thought Pepper would be a cool name. Though, he'd probably have to be a star athlete for the name to really reach its full potential. "He's at the 20....15...10...He breaks a tackle...TOUCHDOWN PEPPER JOHNSON!"

    The name would be a waste if he ended up selling insurance or something.
     
  2. OBY

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    This reminds me of the movie Waiting with Ryan Reynolds. Two customers were talking:

    Male Customer #1: It's too bad Chlamydia has to be a venereal disease. It's such a pleasant-sounding word.
    Male Customer #2: Chlamydia?
    Male Customer #1: Chlamydia.
    Male Customer #2: Chlamydia. I think I might name my daughter Chlamydia.

    I always joke to my friends that I would name my daughter chlamydia
     
  3. Esian

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    My girlfriend was partially on board with me when I suggested the name 'Macon' as a possible future baby name. Until she found out I intended for the middle name to be Whoopie.

    I'm hoping giving birth takes the fight out of her.
     
  4. Blue Dog

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    I think I posted this on the old board, but it would be a shame to deny yall my nephew's "real" name that was bestowed upon him the day he was born.

    I mean, you can't help but be the cool kid in school if your name is "SuperQuik Lazerbeam Chesthair Danger <Last Name>", am I right? Sometimes, we just call him "El Diablo" for short, though.
     
  5. Dmix3

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    Drink

    But that's only applicable if he or she becomes a bartender, then his or her name would be Drink Mixon, full of win.
     
  6. dixiebandit69

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    One time I got a call from my credit card company, and the fillipino operator was named Apple. I asked her if she had a sister named orange or a brother named banana.
    She didn't think it was funny.
    Giving a boy an androgenous name would be great for raising a future serial killer.
    -Lindsey (Lindsey Buckingham, from Fleetwood Mac)
    -Stacy
    -Shannon

    Or give a black/afro-american/ebonic name to a child of any other ethnicity. Imagine a jewish Shante, or a back woods hick named LeBron.
     
  7. Nick

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    For the win.

    This is not a joke. I've actually spoken to this guy before. Several years ago, my company used a search firm called Glo-cap, and he was one of the Managing Partners we occasionally worked with.
     
  8. rei

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    Control, alt, and delete, so if anything goes wrong I can just smack them twice and hope for the best*

    Or maybe Optimus and Megatron so I can tell them to stop fighting.

    From xkcd, there's "Bobby 'DROP_DATABASE; Roberts" and "Help I'm Stuck In A Drivers License Factory Eileen Roberts"


    *Not my joke, forgot where I heard it first.
     
  9. The Village Idiot

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    I'm not naming my kids shit. Fuck that. I just got done arguing with my wife for three days over what were naming a dog. A DOG! You think I'm having this fight? Fuck. That.

    She can name our kids Fuckface 1 and Fuckface 2, Back for More Fucking for all I care.

    Jermajesty? Hahahahaha. Holy mother of God, I really want to hate Jermaine, but I just end up feeling bad for him. Like Down's kids.
     
  10. kuhjäger

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    Is this the thread where someone says something along the lines of:

    "I know someone who works in the inner-city, and they have a client who named their kid Le-a, and when they pronounced it Leia, the mother said, no, her name is Le *dash* a"?


    A friend of mine went to a High School where the principal was named Richard Wiener.

    He could have gone by Rich, or Richard, but no, he decided that his name was Dick Wiener, and he stood by it, even in a high school full of giggling adolescents.
     
  11. MrPrime

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    Every person here should name the kid Seven, ala Seinfeld
     
  12. ilanbg

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    Last year I had a professor named Rector. I emailed him once with the subject line, "Rector? Damn near killed her!" and an innocuous question about an assignment.

    He did not reply.
     
  13. McDermott

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    I'm naming my kid Mug. That's original. Or Ketchup... it's a beautiful name for a girl.
     
  14. Benzilla

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    A friend and I used to make up names like this all the time, my favorite was Doods Bandolier. I always thought Aristotle would be a cool name too, it would force the kid to be born with a full beard to stroke while he pondered the true meaning of his mashed peas.
     
  15. Robbie Clark

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    I know a guy whose hippie parents named him Sevon. His last name is Moore.
     
  16. Now Slappy

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    This is a little tamer than the ones above, but I had a good friend(Peter) who I worked with during the summers growing up. After he finished college he got married, settled down, and started a family. His first child was a boy, and wanting to honor the family tradition he would be named after his grandfather "Jack".

    Now Peter's best friend growing up was Daniel, and Peter decided that this would be a great middle name. (See where I'm going with this?) Now the humor of pairing the two was not lost on Peter, but his wife never put two and two together. The baby was born, and the birth certificate was signed. It was only when other family members started questioning Peter's wife as to what she was thinking when naming her child did she finally see the err of her, (well, mostly her husbands), ways. Little Jack Daniel _______ only stayed named that for a few weeks until they could legally change his name.

    Little Jack is now seven years old, and when the subject of his naming occasionally comes up we all still get a chuckle...Peter's wife? Not so much.
     
  17. Slambrarian

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    My neice's middle name is Pepper. Although, if she was a boy her middle name was going to be Danger. My godson's name is Maverick. He is awesome and so is his name (yes, I did pick it out & his parents loved it). For a brief period of time I wanted to name my son Sockeye Hell Diver (after a beer at the Sockeye Brewery in Boise) - it might have been the hormones. He has a pretty normal name now.

    My GF actually had 2 students on class fight over who was going to name their baby "Inertia." She then suggested "Equilibrium" and they thought that was so pretty too, so the fight ended with all parties satisfied.

    There is currently a student at her old school named "Handsome." So, if we have a boy next, look for lil' Handsome Robinson playing for VA Tech in about 18 years.
     
  18. kuhjäger

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    I knew a guy in college whose last name was Pepper, and re refused to be called by his first name. Only Pepper.

    He was a massive douchebag.
     
  19. shegirl

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    I insure an Alegra, a Trink and a Babbette. Babbette was married to a Babbitt, making her for the duration of the marriage Babbette Babbitt. No wonder they split.

    Edit: I went to school with a Harrison Harrison.
     
  20. Gramercy

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    I'm going to name my kid something awesome, like D'Brickashaw or Treyshawn so he can be the coolest kid in synagogue.
     
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