Am I the only one who has cringe-worthy words in their vocabulary? A word that, if you use when speaking to me, I will interrupt you and ask you to never use it again. Examples: Yum/Yummy WOW, this is the worst one. It manages to be both childish and creepy at the same time. The amount of people who use it in written form for somewhat serious applications blows me away. If you're writing a recipe or reviewing a restaurant, this word shouldn't even cross your mind, nevermind actually make it to the final cut of the article. Moist This almost needs no explanation. Any other word in the English language that is even tangentially associated with something wet is a better choice than this word. Um/Like/Basically I don't mind these used in proper context, but when people have them as verbal ticks when they talk it's distracting and the longer it continues the less intelligent you seem. Using "For" instead of "Because" This is mostly in print. If you substitute "because" with the word "for" (i.e. "You shouldn't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow is another day,") it sounds pretentious and for some reason it always feels like lazy grammar. Focus: What words do you hate? Alt focus: Any words that you overuse/love?
Kismet. Samwich. Pivot (most misused word ever). Optics (again, misuse). 'Boots on the Ground' - misuse again. Ignorant - misuse again. Retard. Ass Clown. Clown Ass. SAP - 'Suck Ass Pussy.' Cunt. Pussy. Penis with ears. The list goes on.
Here's another one I just thought of: Lil'. As in, instead of typing out "Little." I don't know why that bugs me but it does. I have friends on Facebook who refer to their children as Lil' Man or something, and I resist the urge to type, "It's LITTLE."
I detest the word panties. Anything literally anything including lacy twat and taint napkin is better.
Systems Applications and Processes will never be the same to me. I was an SAP developer for close to ten years and never heard that. I will now remember it forever
Focus: Hubby. If you're old enough to be married you shouldn't use the word hubby. Bestie also annoys me when I hear people out of high school using it. In text form, I loathe when people use "u" instead of you. Do those two extra keystrokes really save you that much time? Really any shorthand drives me insane. Anti-focus: I freaking love saying the word moist because it makes everyone uncomfortable.
Anti-focus: Innards. I use it whenever possible, to describe the current state of my own innards, speculate on the conditions of other people's innards. When diagnosing mechanical or electrical things its innards need to be examined. Innards.
Focus: If you use the word synergy or some related version (i.e. synergies), you are a terrible person. It represents the worst of business-world jargon to me. Alt-focus: Clusterfuck is a good one. I just love the nicknames "trash pandas" for raccoons, "sky carp" for geese, and "shit tickets" for toilet paper too. I think my favorite of all time was the way my grandpa used to say son of a bitch and how it came out as this two syllable suhn-bitch. It was definitely his favorite word too, he could apply it in about any sentence (and did).
Panties makes me think of a little old lady named Penelope who has never seen a hard dick in her entire life. "Panties" sucks. I overuse "shit show". Unfortunately it's my mostly used term at work behind closed doors. I don't exaggerate...I just use it when "mess" or "CF" would suffice.
Nosh. I don't even know why but that words bugs the fuck out of me. I had a client come in last week who is recently divorced. She proceeded to tell me all about her boyfriend she'd met on some football website. They had yet to meet, it was happening the following day. She whipped out her cell to show me a topless selfie of this 50 yr old man he'd taken in his bathroom. Carlos looked like a felon. She, however, used the word "yummy" to describe him in upwards of 3-5 times. You're a 50 something year old woman. Yummy shouldn't be ANYWHERE in your vocabulary. I overuse absolutely.
Being in "startup land", it's not so much words as phrases that make me want to break things. The phrase that I currently hate the most, and therefore seem to hear the most, is "what does good look like". It's the new "synergy".
Or 'Ur'. Fucking spell it out, no one should be that lazy. Focus: 'Honey'. If it is not a kid you are talking to or part of some sort of Leave it to Beaver-like sexy-talk, don't ever use that word. I have seen far too many adults refer to their elders, who are still in their right minds, as "honey". It just seems like you are spitting on them verbally; they've seen too much of life to hear childish descriptors of themselves. For another, 'dank', at least how some of the younger generations use it. 'Dank' used to mean in a sentence; "Billy's basement is really dank and moldy, he needs to get somebody to look into that, maybe insulate it better." but now it means good, especially when used for describing marijuana and now it can be used for food and parties and whatever. Sure language changes, but when I hear 'dank' I think of some bat guano laced cave with bugs crawling through the ammonia-reeking shit and the scent of mold spores hitting the upper palate like sin or an abandoned root cellar. 'Amazing' is another; it is far overused for pettier things. Something amazing should be ACTUALLY amazing. Alternative Focus: 'Shitwaffles', 'fucknuts'.
I hate "yaaaassssssss", "slay", and the phrase "connect with...." Because of hair school. I've also developed an aversion to vocal fry and that speaking from the back of the throat where it sounds like you're talking around a loogie that women do. I overuse (and love) "unfuck". "Unfuck yourself, before I do it for you" type thing.
FUUUUUUUUCK YOU, DCC. Also, you abbreviated it incorrectly. My son will always be Li'l Bandit (on here, anyway. He has a real name in real life.). Just to stay on topic, anyone who says or types "bae" needs to have their lungs ripped out through their asshole.
Agreed. This should only be used in conjunction with the word boy. Had a bad day: today used me as its pivot boy. Or alternately if your subordinate fucks up at work: well done, pivot boy.
When do you see it? Pivot I only ever hear in the Muay Thai gym for moving on the balls of one of your feet to counter an oncoming opponent's attack. Focus: It's only because my wife overuses them but creamy and refreshing. I'm buying her a thesaurus for Christmas superglued so that only these two pages open
Lots of the words listed so far bug me, but the only thing that really gets to me, every time, is when someone says they "could care less" about something they clearly don't care about, instead of correctly saying they couldn't care less, since they have no amount of care for said thing. I think it's because it's not just lazy, like 'ur' and all the rest, it's actively wrong, like they had a stroke and don't know what words mean. Only they didn't. Alt: I really like saying 'Praise Christ' in the sarcastic way like Cartman on the Faith +1 episode, when something mundane happens, like a buddy texts me that he's on his way over. Same goes for 'Capital!', like Mr. Burns, for when my roommate texts to say we do have garbage bags left, after all.
If someone says they 'seen' something, I immediately assume they never finished high school. Alt Focus: I get a lot of flack for saying 'retard'. I would never call someone who is mentally disabled a retard, but there are a lot of people who aren't who are fucking stupid even though they don't have to be. 'Retard' is the best way I've found to describe them. If someone has a better suggestion, I'll gladly use it instead.