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I can be your hero, baby...!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by D26, Mar 21, 2011.

  1. Psychodyne

    Psychodyne
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    Yep, you're missing having been bullied, and how that would make you feel. You don't react with anger, because you've never been that scared little kid that didn't know what to do or how to react to a situation that he, as best as he can figure, did not bring upon himself in any way. That's the problem. You don't see it for what it really is, because you've never seen it at all. The fact that so many people are all riled up about it should be an indicator.

    I was bullied a little in Jr. high. Nothing too over the top. I actually became pretty decent friends with one of the guys a year after he stopped, and I asked him "so why were you such an asshole to me last year?" He said he was really sorry about that, and I learned how bad his home life had been during that time and other things. The other few eventually stopped as I stood up to them. After all, it's not satisfying to bully someone who's going to fight back.

    I think backpack kid got what he deserved. And hopefully pudgy kid will gain a little self confidence from this and be a bit more defiant to any other bullies he might come across in life.
     
  2. Crown Royal

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    All you need to do is have eyes to see what's going on in the video. The little kid was taunting, doing that faggy little two-step cocky dicks do in fights, swinging at a kid with his arms down and taunting again. The other kid took a punch and warned him AGAIN to back off.

    Justice was served.
     
  3. Nom Chompsky

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    There was another elementary school in the building that housed mine. One kid from the other school decided, apparently at random, that he didn't much care for me. He'd constantly menace me, but because I was quick (and smart), I never engaged him physically.

    He did have one advantage: one year his classroom was right across from the only bathroom I could use. I can't count the number of days I squirmed uncomfortably on the schoolbus home because my little bladder was stretched tight with fear and urine. I managed to get out of the school without incident, and went to a middle school a few miles away. In a different district.

    First day, walked into my home room, and who was sitting there but this kid. This earring-ed tormentor of my excretory system. Confused as to what to do, I just focused on the teacher until it came time to break up into partnerships for some sort of early project. Still looking forward, I felt him next to me:

    "So do you want to be partner or what."

    Luckily, this wasn't prison lingo, and we actually wound up something as friends. All without a single punch thrown. I'm not really sure why or how this happened, though I suspect that adolescence is tough enough as it is, and even having some sense of continuity is worth ignoring a nonsensical grudge. It might have also been a racial/class thing. Who knows?

    I was only at that school for a year (as planned), though I later heard he was expelled for bringing a razor to school. Kids.
     
  4. Frank

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    So am I the only one that wants to smack D26's dick with a flyswatter for getting Enrique Iglesias stuck in their head?
     
  5. PIMPTRESS

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    I find it interesting that you want it out at all.
     
  6. Frank

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    I didn't say the song didn't turn me on.
     
  7. Crazy Wolf

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    I'm never touching your flyswatter again.




    I wasn't directly bullied too often, due to sorta being in the periphery of any of my school's various social circles. Any fights I got into, I got into trouble for, as I was always taller than my classmates and the opponent had more people to agree with his side of the story. I consistently was punished for altercations by my schools and parents, and even with supposed "zero-tolerance" policies the smaller, instigating brats went without official punishment. The last time I was punched was about 5 years ago or so, I was walking by some completely random shrimp who apparently felt that punching the face of someone a foot taller than him was a good idea. It evidently was, as, being outnumbered and carrying a somewhat fragile computer that I didn't want to be damaged, I decided to keep on walking, despite wanting to break his face in.

    This kid suplexing his bully is a vicarious payback for all of those times that I wanted to fight back but couldn't, for those times I've been punished for defending myself, for those times where having video evidence would have proven me right. I have a hunch that this is how many others feel.
     
  8. toddus

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    So both kids have now made $40k EACH from interviews. So I guess bullying does pay.
     
  9. Frank

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    How does this work? Did they both get agents to work for them right after the video was posted? Does the news network always give a cut of ad revenue to interviewees?
     
  10. toddus

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    My understanding is they are competing tabloid shows who regularly pay for stories. One signed the fat kid first to an exclusive interview. Not wanting to be done for ratings the other signed the little kid. Both deals were reported at $40k AUD, which is basically $40k US.
     
  11. $100T2

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    Last year when my daughter was in first grade, there was a little shit that kept harassing her. Calling her names on the bus, grabbing her, taking her stuff. I figured he had some sort of crush on her, but she really didn't like it and it was making her uncomfortable.

    We did the responsible thing: We told her to ignore him. Didn't stop. We told her to tell the teacher. Didn't stop. Then, she told us that he goes to the Principal's Office almost every day for some sort of behavior issues. Then we found out his Dad is in jail, so yeah, he's got some issues.

    We had also started karate as a family around this time. I told her that if he touched her again, tell him to stop. If he doesn't stop, tell the teacher. If he still doesn't stop, drop him.

    She told me that the teachers said, "If he keeps touching you, ask him to stop. You can't hit him back. You'll get in trouble."

    I'll be damned if my little girl is going to learn that if a boy keeps touching you and you don't like it, you can't retaliate. Great life skills for when she's older, huh?

    I said, "Honey, I promise you: You will NOT get in trouble. If you ask him to stop, tell the teachers, and then have to end it yourself and they take you to the office, tell them to call Daddy."

    So, about a week later, she comes off the bus all smiles. "Daddy, I did what you said. He kept hitting me, and I told him to stop. Then, I told the teacher. He came up at recess and pulled my hair, so I kicked him between the legs and punched him 5 times. He cried on the ground like this [curls up in a ball]. But then he left me alone." She didn't get in any trouble at all.

    We had no trouble with him for the rest of the year.
     
  12. Dcc001

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    This. This is 100% the correct response on everyone's part. When you tell kids to "go and find a teacher and tattle," or admonish them to "not fight back because any violence is wrong," you are sending the wrong message. Children don't have sophisticated coping mechanisms, and when you remove the ability to fight back you are robbing the child of one of the only ways to effectively defend themselves.

    I remember being bullied briefly in school, and my father's response was the same as the above. I did what he told me to do, and it worked like a charm. Not only were the people who saw the hit (and the bully who got hit) leery of fucking with me again, but I think taking action like that builds self confidence in a child. You start behaving with more swagger - for lack of a better term - and more and more kids are less likely to fuck with you.

    I'm not an advocate of violence, but as a defense it's often the only think that works against bullies.
     
  13. roy jones

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    Depsite playing offensive and defensive tackle my entire life, I was constantly picked on by younger kids. This was particularly odd as I had the football team at my back (less one kid which I'll get to).

    In eighth grade, a sixth grader on my bus decided that I was the weak link. He constantly harassed me. I don't even know if this kid had hit puberty yet, and I don't think he weighed more than 80 pounds. After a particular day, he started in on me and I had enough.

    I warned him to stop, or I was going to deck him.

    He did not, and so I decked him.

    Unfortunately, it wasn't even a true punch. I thought about my actions midswing, and attempted to stop. I opened my hand, and the punch became a slap.

    Fortunate enough for me (as, looking back, this could have just fueled the fire), the slap stung and made him cry.

    The bus driver saw the whole thing and told the principal. I got a lecture, but no punishment as the driver recounted his bullying and the fact that I had warned him. I also know how to act remourseful.

    The following year, a different younger kid moved into our neighborhood and saw himself as a badass. I, again, was the target.

    It culminated when he opened my bookbag, took out a sweater I had worn in the morning, and hung it out the window of the bus. When I opened the window, he hit my hand so that I would immediately drop it out the window. I made the driver stop the bus, got my sweater, and walked back and decked him (True punch.) Again, he cried. Again, I was drug in front of the principal (now high school), lectured, and let go due the driver's testimony.

    I had a paper route at the time, and a week later, he attempted to confront me at his house. He grabbed my bag, and tried to pull it away while I walked away. I turned, and in one swift motion, threw him up against the wall. I held him there, and walked away after threatening him.

    He looked like a scared puppy.

    I was bullied successfully by a teammate one year, and it did contribute to me quitting football. I had played first team all summer, and the night before our first game sophomore year, I was replaced by the bully. I had to leave practice early that day, and they plugged him in and (according to the coach) "filled in so well we want to give him a chance".

    I was devastated, but took my medicine. Unfortunately, this kid had a locker across from me in the locker room. He bragged, and when that lost its luster, he began flicking my ears hard. He'd toss my clothes in the trash when I wasn't looking. One time, he pushed me into my locker when I was crouched down getting something off the bottom.

    We were about the same size, and I probably should have fought back. I was worried to fight with a teammate (especially after being demoted to him), and instead retreated into a shell. I never told my parents or coaches because I was embarrassed. The other players that saw this were either friends of this kid, or were victims of abuse by him (and the others in the vicinity).
     
  14. PIMPTRESS

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    I have been asked what I did to end my bullying and it was the same as above.

    The girl had her friends watch the door in class when the teacher was out and came after me. I finally realized that pain wasn't so bad and wasn't afraid. She swung, I grabbed her fist and shoved her on her ass.

    She was on her back, in shock, and I stood over her. The class was ready to burst with held breaths.

    I considered kicking her, but suddenly felt it would be wrong. So I walked out silently.

    It was big news, that damn white girl threw down, haha. No one fucked with me again. The experience taught me that, for the most part, people will only do to you what you allow them to do. I have not taken shit from anyone since.
     
  15. Disgustipated

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    I was bullied through most of high school. Until the age of 15, I was the quiet, spectacled, smart kid. That didn't go down well in my school, which was one of the oldest in the area and smack in the middle of a tough, working class area. I was the only one from my primary school to go there, so I knew no one and was immediately on the outer of most social groups. Over the time I was there, I'd been threatened, spat on, had my locker broken into, publicly taunted, king hit... the lot.

    Being smart worked massively against me too, as this was eons before anything even remotely nerdy gained any sort of credibility. From casual observation, the only two things that were cool at my school were smoking and mullets.

    Somehow I managed to make pretty good friends with a bunch of seniors in my first year. Amongst them was a guy called Shane who a bogan and a troublemaker, but in no way a bully. His younger brother Callan was in my year, and an evil son of a bitch. For some reason he hated me for being friends with Shane.

    Callan tried to corner me for three years before finally catching me at the end of grade 10. He kept wanting to fight me, and every time I refused he just got madder. I'd filled out by this stage, and he was still a wiry little weed. Even though I'd done a few years of martial arts by this stage, I didn't want to get into a fight. For one I was a fair bit of a pacifist back then, but the main reason was there was no such thing as one on one at our school. The usual was a fight worked was one guy stood in front of you, and two or three guys stood behind you with lumps of wood or rocks. And of the few friends I had, there were none that were game to back me up.

    I remember clearly the day Callan cornered me. He was leaving at the end of grade 10 and it was the last day, or nearly the last day, so I think he was forcing the issue to make sure he got me before he left. I was outside the library and someone told me he was coming to get me. Maybe I was tired of running, because I didn't leave. He arrived with a fair group of hangers-on a few minutes later, and a crowd quickly formed. There were no teachers to be seen anywhere.

    Over and over he kept challenging me to a fight, telling me to take my glasses off and fight him. I kept refusing, saying I didn't want to fight. Plus I knew that if I took my glasses off I wouldn't be able to see anything. After a few minutes, someone managed to bat them off my face and someone else scooped them up. Callan took that as his opportunity to get in. I definitely remember thinking that I do some damage to him if I wanted to, but that I'd end up the worse for it overall. And there wasn't much else I could do. So, I stood there and took his punch.

    I didn't put my hands up. He squared up and let this looping haymaker fly at my head. His fist hit me square on the side of the jaw, hard. Despite being weedy, he was a scrapper and had been in a lot of fights. It hurt like a motherfucker and my head was ringing, but I just stood there and looked at him without giving any indication that he'd just hit me.

    Maybe that was all he wanted. Maybe he realised that he'd hit me with a solid punch and it did nothing. Maybe he was in shock I wasn't lying on the ground crying. I don't know. Either way, he said some crap and walked off and everyone dispersed. I don't remember ever seeing him again. And while I still got hassled for the rest of my school life, no one ever tried to hit me again. That was the last "fight" I was in that didn't occur in a ring.
     
  16. $100T2

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    Hate to bump this up because it's old, but we've got another situation with a little shit at my kids' school.

    A little boy has been harassing my daughter (2nd graders). He bugs the shit out of her, and up until today, it was 90% harmless shit. Today I get a call from the school that he was talking to her about her private parts. She told him to leave her alone, and another kid ran and got the teacher. He got dragged to the Principal's office and sent home. I told them to give my phone number to his parents so they can explain themselves. Of course, they haven't called.

    I informed the school that, like last year (look up a few posts), we're not going to tolerate this type of behavior and that I've instructed my daughter to "drop him" if he messes with her again. Got out the focus mitts and kicking pad today, and taught her how to hit with the elbow first, then follow up with punch combos. My son, who is 1.5 years younger, says that if he sees this kid messing with her at recess, "I'm gonna put an end to it." They both do karate, and proceeded to demonstrate their best kicks and punches. Adorable, huh?

    Here's the thing: I can find out easily enough where this kid lives. Do I go over there and scare the living piss out of him and his parents, or do I just let the school handle it?

    EDIT: Oh, and there's been a huge focus in the schools about anti-bullying and all that for the past year or two. All talk and very little (or no) action.
     
  17. Nettdata

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    I'd say call the cops, tell them you'd like to report a sexual assault.

    That way you don't get hauled off in cuffs, the incident gets officially noted and documented, the school gets put on notice you're not fucking around (a paranoid school admin is a good thing in this case), and, if the cops are good, the other parents will get a visit by them which should do wonders for their level of giving a shit.

    If the cops won't get involved, then call the local TV station and see if they'd be interested in running a story; this is prime MSM fodder, and nobody likes airing their shit out in public.

    If none of those work, then go and have a conversation with the kid's parents.

    Whatever you do, do NOT talk to the kid directly yourself, or you then become the evil pedo.

    Failing THAT, put a saddle on Tonka and have him earn his keep.
     
  18. $100T2

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    I need Whatsinanames dog Teufel to come over and pin the kid to the floor. That would be awesome.

    Tonka is too much of a pansy.

    Luckily, school is out in 2 weeks, and we can at least demand she's not in class with him next year. My daughter is actually ready to throw down if he messes with her again, and my son wants a piece of him, too.
     
  19. theillest

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    I'm no parent, so take this with a grain of salt, but I'd say arrange to meet with the parents through the school if possible. If the school has a counselor have them mediate a meeting wherein you can air all this shit out. I think calling the cops or the news will just add undue attention to the issue. If it's remembered on the playground that your daughter will get the cops after you, it may end up causing more harm than good.
     
  20. Nettdata

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    I agree that my recommendation is a last resort, but I'm assuming that he already has talked to the school and they haven't done anything.

    He's already asked for a phone call with the other parents, and that hasn't happened.

    If they're unwilling to have even basic communication about it, what other options are there?

    Now, admittedly I'm no parent, and have no experience with this kind of situation, so it might not be at all the right thing to do.