We've had lots of wonderful advice threads here over the years--TIB tips and tricks, Ask a woman/man--and I feel like I've learned a lot from all you crazy kids. The other day I was at a girl's night talking to my friends about a whole bunch of things when I realized that our knowledge of all things girly basically didn't overlap. I imagine that the wonderful ladies of the TIB might have some clever hacks/tips on how to be better at being a girl, and that our delightful gentlemen might be able to help each other out in much the same way. For instance: I do all my household chores in stripper heels. I have two reasons for this. One, because it's a surprisingly good workout. Two, because if you can do laundry, vacuum, etc. while wearing six inch heels, you can handle anything that the world is going to throw at you in standard high heels. Best way I've found yet to become good at walking in heels. If you have trouble with chapped lips, buy a cheap toothbrush, slather your lips with some kind of balm, and then scrub 'em with the toothbrush for 30 seconds every night before bed. In a couple of days you'll have perfect, kissable lips! Focus Share your tips for being the best man/woman you can be
I have a few tips that have worked for me lately. Hair conditioner is a great shave cream for your legs To keep a bottle of nail polish from sticking, put a little Vaseline inside the lid. Baking soda is one of the greatest inventions of our time. Add it to shampoo to make your hair more manageable and help clean away build-up from other hair products. Mix it with water and it's an acne medication and an exfoliant that won't make your skin red. It relieves sunburn, replaces deodorant when you're in a bind, and keeps your cuticles soft. If you want to stop late-night snacking, brush your teeth.
Wash your penis. If you've been lazy for over a week, use one of those foot files to get the smegma off. Hooded gents pull back skin and then wash/scrape. Seriously, after all the years this place has spent helping us become worse people we're going to try to be better now? If i check will I find it's national "feel guilty week"? On Topic though - Married men. Help out. I do my own laundry, I cook lots, I give the kids baths while my wife makes lunches for kids (or vice versa) I am still shocked at the amount of guys who do piss all at home and wonder why they have no sex life. Really? When you have two kids and you both work and have a shit load of other things to do everyday, if you don't do some of it don't act suprised at the "I'm too tired" response. It doesn't take a lot to get a little. Do this even if she's just a "stay at home mom", trust me, going to work is easier.
OH! I knew I forgot something. Ladies, exfoliate. Exfoliate the shit out of every square inch of your body, especially anywhere you shave/wax. It will do more for preventing ingrown hairs than anything else you've ever tried. Buy some sort of an exfoliating cloth and learn to love it. The 2 or 3 minutes extra this takes in the shower will totally be worth it.
Own a tool box, but there's a catch: you have to have actual tools in it that you actually know how to use. If you go to fix something and the only thought that crosses your mind is to strike the object with great force, tell your girl to kick you in the balls with a cowboy boot. If you feel pain I have no idea why. "I must be using the wrong kind of hammer on this screw!" is something a man should never say.
If you don't know how to do something find out, we have the Internet and its fucking wonderful. also nothing wrong with asking for help. Buying tools: if it's something you can see yourself using a lot, buy something decent. Sure, mastercraft is nice for that once a year thing but use it longer than an hour consecutively, it'll likely break.
Men, learn how to cook 2-3 dishes very well. Like, complete meal type dishes. If you're single, it'll make you healthier and it's cheaper than take out all the time. If you're married, it means the ability to trade off responsibilities every once in a while.
THIS. Can we just have a cleanliness thread? I have seen bathrooms that were so filthy they seemed to crawl and undulate. It's a small room. Invest in a jug of Murphy's Oil Soap, some Clorox terlet cleaner, and clean your fucking toilet, sink, tub once a month. If it takes you more than 20 minutes you did something wrong. You guys wash your balls, so wash your sheets. Half of you are probably sleeping on a yellowed sheet that has a sweat outline of your body resembling the Shroud of Turin made of human grime. Also, if you're not washing your ass and balls, WASH YOUR FUCKING ASS AND BALLS. Don't stand up to wipe, don't wipe back to front, and don't stop wiping until the brown comes off. The French invented the bidet. Are you no better than a stinky surrender monkey? Top it all off by flossing. Most people have breath that could melt steel. - Read. Read voraciously. Expose yourself to the written word, to the beauty of words. Why? Every now and then a written work will elucidate your own feelings in language you may never have known existed, those unnameable, unspeakable feelings in some cases. Improve your mind through books. Form opinions. Learn things others don't, or won't. Read others' opinions, even if you do not agree with them. Immerse yourself in intelligent discourse. To read at first for pleasure, is to come by reading for knowledge later, as if it is the most natural thing. I say the same thing for art. I like finding beauty wherever I can. Though, I can see how art is difficult for people to get into. - Cook. Explained ad nauseum elsewhere. - Buy clothes that fit. This is superficial, but it makes a world of difference. If this was a 3rd world country, I'd say "learn to irrigate." But this is not Haiti. You'd be surprised how much deference a person will get for being dressed appropriately. - Don't blow your money on retarded shit. Do you really need all that shit? (Says the guy with about 2000lbs of books and a stuffed armadillo.) My point is to become a self sufficient, interesting man. Nobody likes a boor. Nobody likes a needy clod either. At the very least, I strive not to sound like a fucking idiot every time I open my mouth.
Seriously. I'm not a tremendously clean person, I fall behind on laundry, my desk at work is cluttered, but I can't stand a dirty bathroom. My old roommate was frighteningly neat and tidy. His room was spotless and he was neurotic about everything. Yet he was a messy bitch in the bathroom and I was the one who kept it clean. It was so confusing... Also, do people seriously not wash their groin area in the shower? What the fuck are you doing in there? I've never had to scrub nasty shit off my penis. FOCUS: Keep in touch with people, especially your close friends. So many people get lazy and just bring in new people as others cycle out of your life for whatever reason or when its harder to hang out. Those "replacement" friends are the ones who disappear as soon as they get married or a new job or a myriad of other reasons. 2 of my closest friends that I talk to all the time, I have probably seen a combined 4 times in the last 12-18 months. Its harder to maintain that friendship than kids I just met that live in Chicago, but I appreciate them all the more and those are likely the people who potentially will be godparents to my children.
Find some kind of physical activity that you enjoy. Whether that's training for tris, playing tennis, rock climbing, whatever, find something that challenges your mind and body. Living a sedentary lifestyle increases the risks for numerous physical and mental diseases.
In a "tips and tricks you might not know for getting through life" thread, I was at first wondering why in the hell not soapin' up the balls wasn't a given. Then I realized where we are.
Every time you flush the toilet, close the toilet lid before you flush. This is because, with every flush the water turbulence/splashing creates a micromist of particles that eject from the bowl onto surrounding surfaces. Including you and your face. If you must, you can check afterwards to see if that log you deposited got flushed away properly.
Take pride in everything you do. Always do it better than last time, whether work or play. Your quality of life will improve.
Honor your commitments. If you say yes to something, do it. It will also help you to think carefully. I know too many people who say yes to everything and then flake. In the same vein... Learn to say no. You can't always make everyone happy, and while you shouldn't be a narcissistic asshole, also don't greatly inconvenience yourself all the time. Volunteer. Doing a good thing goes a long way. Helping in a soup kitchen or animal shelter really puts the fact that your favorite show keeps buffering in perspective. To echo what some have said, read. If you don't like reading, take it slow, but try to read a book a month. Also , maybe pick subjects that you have been interested in but have never really taken the time to learn about in depth.
Be chivalrous. Guys and girls alike. We hired a guy at work about six months ago. I gauged him to be a very young 21 or 22. Nope. He's almost 30. He doesn't have a chivalrous bone in his body. He doesn't hold the door for anyone; he doesn't rush to help you carry a parcel; if you walk anywhere with him, he strides ahead at his own pace oblivious of the rest of the group. I cannot stress enough how much this bothers me. We've had group debates about it at work, where he stands by his ways. Our plant manager, who is old-school Chilean, heard New Guy's views and scoffed, "C'mon, you don't stride ahead of your wife on the street just because she's walking slowly." There was a beat of silence and then I said, "[New Guy] does just that." And Plant Manager was horrified. So, be chivalrous. It's another way of saying be kind. Try to be courteous and help people, and everyone's day just goes much better. Be forgiving. And not just with people who have wronged you. Learn to view yourself with a little bit of compassion and try to forgive yourself for mistakes or transgressions. It makes it easier to move on and learn from them. Own an animal and raise it well. I figure, if you have an animal that is healthy and balanced and at peace, it's a good indication of your essence as a person. EDIT: How the hell could the use of the word 'parcel' every be construed as ironic?
Be honest. Being real with people as rare as unicorn poo these days, so be brutally, soul-scrapingly honest with yourself first and then with others. If you don't feel it, don't say it. This applies to relationships more than anything. Learn how to be useful. Know how to fix anything that your life depends on, if it's an Xbox, a car, or a vibrator. Learn how to be pleasant. It's too easy and common to be a gruff asshole, especially to the people who do the most for you (cook your food, clean your office, care for your kids, do your paperwork). Smile, be a pleasant person to do things for/with and your life suddenly become hassle-free. Admit you are wrong. This is one of the most important skills you can cultivate. Being realistic about things you have fucked up, accepting the blame and moving on is vital to growing as a human being, managing your ego, and keeping yourself sane. Also, manscaping. Seriously, ain't no one trying to have that Wookiee shit.
1. Do what you fucking say you will. It'll teach you to shut your stupid mouth and think before you speak. Show up when you say you're going to show up. Do what you say you're going to do. And be upset, apologetic and genuinely sorry when you can't do something you said you would. Try and make it right. It fucking matters - even if it doesn't matter. I matters because you said it. Telling someone you can't do something you said you'd do should be one of the most humbling acts of your life. 2. Be honest. The more someone matters to you, the more honest you should be. Polite lies are fine for strangers, or people in crisis. But when someone asks you if their ass looks big? If their breath smells? If everyone thinks they're an asshole? Tell them the fucking truth. Be the person your friends come to for the truth. Be the person that your friends trust to not fucking lie to them. Be the person your boss knows will tell him what's actually going on. Brutal honesty is a rare thing - there should be more of it. And remember the difference between being honest no matter what, and being a dick for the sake of being a dick. 3. Think. Figure shit out. Don't rely on what you've learned, figure out what makes sense. And remember that the things you know rely on a premise - that your parents knew what they were talking about. That wikipedia is correct. That whatever you believe or learned but that you haven't proved for yourself should at least make fucking sense, not just be so, because you were told that it's so. When you understand things, instead of just remembering them - you learn new things with vastly more ease.